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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Entries in Just Funny (614)

Monday
Apr232018

It's Worse Than That, They're Dead, Jen

So Jen wants you to think our national parks are all fun and games and kayaking and snuggling baby otters and stuff. Well, we live in Florida, man! We have the Everglades where literally everything wants to kill and eat you. Or kill you and leave your body for something ELSE to eat you. But definitely with the killing thing.

What, you think I'm exaggerating?

THIS ALLIGATOR WANTS TO EAT YOUR FACE.

That's right, a smashed cake alligator wants to kill you. It's serious down here, guys.

 

And then there's the snakes:

"Help meeeee!"

Which this baker has so helpfully illustrated mid-murder.

 

We've got poison toads:

"I want you to croak."

 

And snakes:

GAAAAAAkeepscrollingkeepscrollingkeepscrolling

 

And giant angry spiders:

Who team up with killer bees...

 

Did I mention the snakes?

BECAUSE WE HAVE A LOT OF SNAKES.

 

Not to mention the armies of squirrel-sized mosquitoes:

They're very friendly. No sense of personal space.

 

Piranhas:

Seriously.

 

And panthers.

NO LION.

Because of course we have panthers. Why wouldn't we have panthers?! I mean, what would a swamp be without FRIGGIN PANTHERS?!?!?!

So.
To sum up, if you come to one of Florida's many beautiful national parks, you're gonna die. Probably. Best not to chance it. Just go to Disney and marvel at the animatronic deer and bunnies, which are super lifelike this time of year.

 

This has been a public service announcement from Cheryl G., Kelly V., Tracey S., Anony M., Sarah G., Andrew W., Ashley M., Kelly R., & Gretchen T.

*****

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And from my other blog, Epbot:

Thursday
Apr192018

Wax Poetic, Wax Off

Because bad poems and bad cakes go together like two things that go together and also rhyme.

 

Long like the trombone
are a giraffe's neck bones
7 bones
Bony bones
But Phil only had one bone.

Sucks to be you, Phil.

*******

 

There once was a baker called Smit
Whose spelling was never a hit
From what I have heard
He botched ev'ry word
Except one: that guy knew his...

...stuff.

****

 

Elsa didn't know
Until blood started flowing
What she'd created

****

 

DO NOT

stand

in
         cake
             case

[whispering] Bakeryyyyy

****

 

Once in a season, very near Fall
From deep in the forest, trees shady and tall

Comes something peculiar, and so seldom seen
Like a leprechaun's gold, or a unicorn's spleen

Look quickly, my brethren, for with any luck
You'll be graced with the majesty of Weenie Buck

*snapsnapsnap*

 

Thanks to Keelan M., Julia C., Jess K., Kia H., & Kristy D. for helping us channel our inner Charlie McKenzie. ("WOMAN! Whoaaaaa-MAN!")

*****

Thank you for using our Amazon links to shop! USA, UK, Canada.

And from my other blog, Epbot: