Hawaiians Weep Tonight
April 24, 2019 OK, everybody! Sing it with me!
We-e-e-e-EE-EE-e-e-e-we-oh-mum-a-weh
We-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-we....
;)
What does
that saaay?
A wimoweh, a wimoweh, a wimoweh, a wimoweh
A wimoweh, a wimoweh, a wimoweh, a wimoweh
A wimoweh, a wimoweh, a wimoweh, a wimoweh
A wimoweh, a wimoweh, a wimoweh, a wimoweh
In the bakery, the mega bakery
;)
Hawaiians weep tonight
In the bakery, the mega bakery
;)
Hawaiians scream in fright.
A-weeee-e-e-e-eeeeee...
;)
... flip-flop dismaaaaay.
A-weee-e-e-e-eeeeee...
;)
... Those. Aren't. Okaaaaay.
Near the village, there's lava spillage
;)
They may not last the night...
Near the village, the gummies pillage
;)
Hawaiians flee their plight.
A-weeee-e-e-e-eeeeee...
;)
... beach disarraaaaaay.
A-weee-e-e-e-eeeeee...
;)
... throw that awaaaaay.
[wailing and instrumental solo]
Hush my darling, don't dare, my darling
;)
That pineapple's not right...
Hush my darling, don't stare, my darling
;)
HAWAIIANS WEEP TONIGHT.
HEP HEP!
Aloha OY! to Anony, Deirdre, Susan K., Melissa V., Lisa & Kate & Rob, Sophie J., Karen H., Alyssa B., Patricia M., Samantha M., And Christy J., for braving their various bakeries to send these to us. It's a jungle out there.
*****
Do you shop Amazon? Then how about clicking through my affiliate link to shop? USA, UK, Canada.
Visiting Amazon through those links will help support the site, and costs you nothing. Thanks, guys!
And from my other blog, Epbot:
Reader Comments (35)
Brilliant! Just... genius. I am not worthy.
You can’t mess with perfection, and this is Perfect in every way. Ahola everyone!
"... throw that awaaaaay." Excellent as always, Sharyn!
Good grief! That last cake gave me a coughing fit. The poor woman is SO flat chested - and pulling her boobs up under her chin doesn't help!
Bravo, Sharyn! That was brilliant!
I knew this was a Sharyn post! Thanks for the smiles this morning and thanks (I think) for the ear worm.
You truly have a gift for song parody and the perfect place to share it. Thx Jen & John for sharing your delightful blog with the world.
I hope I'm not the only one to do a double take at where they apparently took the first piece from on the headless hula girl...
My bad, she's not headless. Still....
That's a whole lotta Rick...
<snerk>
I don't usually need to move my mouth to read posts... but AAAAHHH! Today. And now I have an earworm.
Well done. Brava!
That was better than the lyrics to the original Star Trek theme song: Oo-OOOH-oo-oo-oo-oo-oo-ooohh… (Unfortunately, I just looked those up and discovered that there actually were lyrics to the original Star Trek music, really awful ones, and I'm so bummed out now.)
HEP HEP? more like HELP HELP!
Brilliant.
Awww...My grandma used to say “Ahola.” She also called the state ”Hawaya,” so theorems that.
That is the best rendition ever!
Dying. Here.
Hooray, a singalong post by Sharyn! Ahola, Sharyn!
What on earth is that thing on the ninth cake meant to be? A turkey? A pig? A weird coconut??
I know this is a joke site, but... I guess I'm That Person who feels compelled to point out that this song has nothing to do with Hawaii.
Ahola!
This is hilarious ! Ahola !
Love it!!!! laughed so hard my eyes are watering
I am IN HAWAII as I read this, at the airport, laughing! This one is a keeper. But those cakes aren't.
Mahalo for the ear worm and the nightmare fuel! I kept right on singing the song right through the end credits (because why not) A-weee-e-e-e-eeeeee...
First cake:
The lesson to be learned from this is that when hiring an English/Spanish-bilingual decorator, make sure they're aware that there are also other languages besides English & Spanish!
The Barbie cake:
Well, at least they didn't but red icing dots on the centers of the "coconut shells"...
On the other hand, if they'd have put on just red icing dots & left off the tan "coconuts" they could've sold it as a bachelor party special; because let's face it, who else besides a pack of drunk, horny dudes is going to want a doll with icing on its ta-tas? That's just not going to fly at a family party...
Kid: "Mom! Can I have the Barbie from the cake? I want to lick the icing off!"
Mom: "No."
Kid: "But why?"
Mom: "Because... you shouldn't lick plastic toys, the chemicals in the plastic will stunt your growth."
Kid: "Oh. I'll wipe it off with my finger then."
Mom: "No. I don't want you doing that either."
Kid: "But--"
Mom: "I said no. I'm going to just wash it off."
Dad: "Well there's no need to waste perfectly good icing. Since I'm done growing," *winks at Kid* "I'll lick the icing off Barbie's--"
Mom: "No! Nobody's eating anything off the Barbie...I'm going to wash it off & that's that!" *gives Dad the "you're sleeping on the couch tonight" look*
The real shame is that, aside from the poor decision to clothe Barbie with skin-tone icing, the cake actually looks pretty good,
evenespecially for a doll cake -- we know how wrong those tend to go!Number 9: (number 9, number 9, number 9...)
Ah, yes! The extremely rare Polynesian Quasquibicentennial Poo Blossom. This botanical marvel blooms once every 225 years, & smells like...well...you know...
Last cake:
Looks like a dashboard hula-girl spent a 110° day in the sun... eeesh!
I don't know. Those filled cookies with the palm trees perched on top look pretty tasty. It also helps that I'm colorblind.
Ahola, other Jennifer, you are not the only one who wondered why the first slice taken from the one cake was the, uh, hula skirt area. (REALLY??? THERE???)
You know, if you're going to make a coconut bra out of frosting, at least use coconut-colored icing, not flesh-toned. It looks like Barbie's had some unfortunate work done.
After the previous several cakes, I would totally eat the poo islands. They're the most tolerable.
Scary flotsam island: Oh, goody. We get to play the "What's Edible and What's Not" game!
Is that bacon on the next cake? Or, like, really old and gross communion wafer sheets? And why does it look like the one gummy guy is Photoshopped onto the cake?
...skipping "Throw that away" because...yeah.
Finally, Barbie's got some non-coconut-bra competition, seeing how the last one's top appears to be made out of chocolate chip cookies. You know, us flat girls like at least having the illusion of a chest, decorators.
(Why yes, I was sugared-up before reading this post. It may have sent me over the edge.)
Is that Hawai’i? Or the Poop Atoll (cake(s) #5) inhabited by eyeless elephant like sentient turds? (#9)
I totally sung all of that.
I dunno, that 'gummies pillage' cake looks okay. I mean, I wouldn't EAT it, but it LOOKS okay. :P Also, the song is amazing!!
A-weeeeee...
That huly-huly girl is serving some Frank Sidebottom Realness.
Also, I am LIVING for those animal print birthday candles.
Your Pal,
Storm
Those are flip flops? I thought it was a yellow polka dot bikini wannabe!
What song is this post making fun of, pls?
That green one in the middle looks like fun. I'd have absolutely loved that one for a birthday cake when I was a kid... even now, too!
Great post! Scary cakes! To Carly, the original song is "The Lion Sleeps Tonight" by the Tokens.
You should have seen my husbands face as I sang this out loud lol. Pretty sure the neighbors can still hear our laughter. Mwhahhahahha :D
Is that third cake down anatomically correct? If not, what is that between the two halves of her grass skirt? Maybe a turd? Why in the name of all that's holy would you make something that sad and...wait, is her face a photo someone slapped on top of the head? I wish only to forget this ever happened.
That’s an African spiritual not a Hawaiian song lol. But very horrifying none the less.