Friday
Aug212009
Two Words, Bakeries:
August 21, 2009 Drug screening.
Seriously. You guys might want to look into it.
You also want to make sure the DTs are over.
"Triangle Man, Triangle Man,
Doing the things a triangle can..."
And just FYI, managers: Drawing a tuxedo-clad "Triangle Man" with webbed feet is not compelling evidence of sobriety. So you probably shouldn't pick that guy to do the window display:
On the other hand, if you ever have an occasion that calls for a clown to run over another clown who's broken in half while stabbing at a third clown - who's drowning - and all three to be surrounded by bucks, bucking broncos, and mysterious brown swirls in the sky... well, then, you should probably seek professional help.Courtney C., Jen C., Kirsten K., & Samantha R., I get by with a little help from my friends.
- Related Wreckage: Back to Basics
Reader Comments (172)
Well at least they didn't draw Particle Man!
The first cake looks like something my kids would put together and the last one looks like the decorator stuck all of the plastic "toys" that no kids wanted on their cakes. What a mess!
mysleepinghusband.com
This is just... wow. I don't even have anything witty to say. My brain hurts looking at the first one.
The landscape alone in that last one is cause for worry. Love those bucks just chillin under the palm trees. You know... like they do.
I think that if Tim Burton was to use those cakes as the basis of his next movie that those sets would easily win the Oscar for "Best Set Design That Makes You Want to Gouge Out Your Eyes While You Listen to Pink Floyd."
Josh
http://thedmt.blogspot.com
woah. do my eyes decieve me, or is there writing on that green cake?
*cleans glasses; leans towards computer screen*
why, yes! there is writing. Happy 4th Birthday Nate.
Ahh, triangle man. My hero.
OMG! I was totally singing "Particle Man" in my head when I first saw that cookie. Maybe it's supposed to be that flounder guy on Spongebob Squarepants!
Oh, poor, poor Nate. His cake looks like silly string gone horribly wrong.
Angie (from over at www.HalfAssedKitchen.com)
OH OH I got it....the first one is a butterfly with graffi, and triangle man is a space rocket, do i get a prize for guessing right please please .......with sprinkles and sugar??????
Hahah the green cake...it's a spastic nightmare. I just imagine the decorator screaming as they were decorating it.
TMBG reference? Jen, your geekdom knows no bounds!!
I think "Triangle Man" is supposed to be a rocket.....but...its terrible.
clowns are creepy as hell and should be out-lawed. period.
Not to mention that the other clown is sinking in quicksand!
#1: “Can’t get this” -- *click-click* -- “dang red airbrush tool” -- *click-click* -- “to wooooork -- YAAAAAAA!! Jane! Stop this crazy thiiiiiiiiing!!!”
#2: “Lettuce and worms! Why, Nate is going to so love this!”
#3: “Dang it, Jane, I told you, don’t put the black frosting next to the white frosting on the KKK cake!”
#4: “Oh, give me a home, where the clowns and cars roam, and the deeeer and the antelope run away…”
^..^
WV: imiscup. Imiscup cake cakes...NOT!!!
Okie Dokie.....
Ummm.. Since when are kitchen scrubbies and silly string appropriate as cake decorations for a four year old?
Can we work on a new anti-drug campaign? These cakes are real good examples of "this is your brain on drugs".
OK, the second one looks like some bad B-movie, "attack of the lettuce patch!".
And yay for the TMBG reference :)
Jen, your comments are so much more cohesive than mine were when my friend Jen sent me this picture -- my comments were more along the lines of "Bucks. and Clowns. and a ... white horse?" Hilarious, thanks for sharing. :D
The words I'm thinking of for the bakeries are "Child Labor Laws." Seriously, these look more like they were done by children, for the most part, as opposed to an acutal drunk or dugged adult.
I think "Triangle Man" is actually a rocket blasting off into space.
Yeah man, that butterfly is totally rad!!
You do not see the avant-garde, Fellini-esque quality of that last cake?? It is a masterpiece!
Those deer seem to longingly looking at me for help. They're lost in a crazy clown world. Too bad that horse isn't a unicorn. Chaaarliee!
My children think I've lost my mind, I'm laughing so hard. The clown cake owns me. Seriously.
I thought maybe the tort was the after effects of a child who'd been given epicac syrup because they swallowed an iPod. And they threw up on roadkill. Maybe.
Lol :P Triangle man :)
The second one is either Magic Eye or made by Georg Baselitz (but in that case it is upside down).
Swatopluk
Your blog as been recommended to me by several of my friends, and I have to say I get a real kick out of it. But as a cake decorator how does this stuff happen?
Like the cake that looks like silly string was put all over it. Is that what they ordered by the customer? [I've received some odd orders before, but nothing like that ^_~]
Wrecker Man, Wrecker Man. Someone please hit him with a frying pan. Lives his life, thinking he can. Wrecker Man.
Ha! I often wonder looking at your blog if the wreckerators are on drugs. Now there is an entire post about that exact thing. Awesome.
Do you ever think about how horrible it would be to work in the factory that makes those (horrifyingly) ubiquitous plastic clown picks? Not only are the workers unlikely to be making a living wage and are probably exposed to all kinds of health-threatening chemicals, but the nightmares that such work must induce! Now there's a job for OSHA (of China?)
OMG, all I could think on the DT cake was "Poor Nate. He's only 4, and this is his cake???"
The murderous clown cake reminds me of your post from the 1960s book with cakes of pirates murdering comely ladies.
Perhaps we should be grateful that these troubled individuals are taking their aggression out in the form of cakes, vs. actually *doing* something murderous in reality.
Freaking hilarious! I am going to *sing* the "triangle song" all day now! :) And I think the last cake is the one of the top depictions of a "wreck" on my list of faves! I LOVE THIS BLOG!!
I took the photo of the clown cake (you can see my dress pattern reflected in the glass). The bakery is actually a Chinese restaurant... that just happens to also make cakes.
I've never commented before, but I've got to give you kudos for the They Might Be Giants reference!
That song is going to be stuck in my head all day...
What, exactly, is that green on chocolate mess supposed to be? Seems like maybe someone let their 2 year old play with the piping bag.
WV: Ungissei Wreckorator to boss "Ungissei..uuumm...no, I haven't been drinking again."
I think triangle man is supossed to be a rocket ship - those are the blaster things at the bottom, not webbed feet. Ok so it's still stretching the imagination but I'm just saying....
Actually, I think the clown cake is hysterical. I don't get it, but it's hysterical.
Poor Nate.
My eyes! My eyes! What is wrong with the person that thinks that all that GREEN frosting is appetizing? UGH!
i'm going to have nightmares from the green one...
I must now add a ton of TMBG songs to my Grooveshark playlist! "They have a fight, Triangle wins..."
I think "triangle man" is a rocket taking off and his "feet" is the fire that ocomes out the end.
I think I'm about to have a green frosting induced seizure. You have a little warning like they have on video games. I think Nate's cake is dangerous to synapses.
Love the TMBG reference, though.
WV: reecol- the green cake made me reecol in horror.
Major points for the They Might Be Giants reference.
The green cake....thing looks like, what will happen when the baker let his/her three year old daughter alone playing around in the kitchen. "I'll be back soon, honey. Don't touch anything! Especially not this cake there!!"
And the clowns... I understand people who suffer from a phobia of clowns better and better. Maybe they got a birthday cake like this at their third birthday.
How do you get a 4 year old to eat his veggies, like lettuce and broccoli?? Make them out of green icing, of course!!! And is that Triangle Man or Triangle Penguin? "I got so carried away with the buttons and wings, that I forgot to leave room for the head!" explained the wreckorator....
There HAS to be a story behind the road-trip frolicking clowns headed into the wild west----where the deer and the horseys play.
I think Triangle Man is meant to be a Penguin....
I must echo Wild Cakes: you are a geek, refreshing though that is... You should give a shout out to the Giants, though. Taking credit for their funnies...
I think that the last cake is an attempt to help the recipient get over his/her fears. I mean, who isn't afraid of clowns? Or of falling off of a bucking bronco and being trampled? Or bucks...um, maybe they saw that video of a hunter getting attacked by one and got freaked out? And palm trees...*ahem* Well, okay, you have to admit that brown swirly things in the sky would be, at the least, alarming. Of course, now this poor person will also be afraid of birthday cakes.
The butterfly looks like a 3 year old decorated it, and it would be really cute for a 3 year old... but not so much for a professional.
Triangle man isn't a triangle man, it's supposed to be a rocket ship.