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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Monday
Oct062008

Cake Wrecks the Game Show?

Some cakes are like those ink blot tests you saw in grade school: baffling blobs of color open to interpretation. Well, not exactly; cakes are usually supposed to look like something in particular. Sometimes they taste better, too.

Anyway, since I've gotten a few of these "ink blot" type cakes submitted, I thought it'd be fun to add a little suspense to your daily dose of Wreckage. That's right, boys and girls, now it's time to play...

"Guess That Wreck!"

Everyone ready? Ok, clear your mind of all thoughts. Now, scroll down and tell me what you see:

"What's that? Ah, you see the moon cooking on the grill in a paper bag? [scribbling on notepad] Interesting, veeery interesting... [looking over glasses] And tell me, how IS your relationship with your mother?"

Check back tomorrow for the "answer": I'll post a picture of what the cake was supposed to look like. In the mean time, let's see who can come up with the most outrageous explanation. I may even post the top 3 guesses here, so bring on the funny, folks; fame and fortune await!*

Thanks to Dana W. for inspiring a brand new category! Oh, and Dana? Don't go giving away the answer just yet, k?

*By "fame" I mean a shout-out to your posting name, and "fortune" is used more in the "destiny" sense of the word than the "wealth or riches" sense. So in other words, no, you won't be getting any money*. Unless someone sends it to you, of course. But that someone would not be me. So probably not.

* Or begetting any money, either; 'cuz that'd just be weird. And wrong. But mostly weird.

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Reader Comments (575)

it look like cockroaches wearing football helmets carrying a ti-dye couch.

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterCheese

It looks like a cookout at the cannibal family gathering! All the tiny heads, that flesh-toned and grill-marked section looks EITHER like the "breast" section, or a rump roast. And the bottom? Well-done tongue...mmm mmm GOOD!

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterDea

Is it a couch with giant bugs coming out from under it?

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterSuzy Q

Having now seen a picture of the Superdome, I have to agree with the majority of the comments. My goodness, what a hideous cake.

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterRedheaded Mama

Helmets? I think they look like OLIVES. Just what I want with my cake, OLIVES. Why would you put OLIVES all around a cake?

It's how they crush OLIVES to make OLIVE oil...

Did I mention they look like OLIVES???

Patricia

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterPatricia

kinda looks like a little weird crab w/ a fluer de le on it. Guess it could be in reference to the saints since what I took to be legs are in actuality football helmets. I know, a football playing crab?

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered Commentersues2u2

My first thought was the back side of Sponge Bob's square pants & that thing in the middle was his crack. But now it looks like a sofa couch being carried away by a million cockroaches.

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterCece

Clearly this is a comment on the current Canadian election. The fleur de lis (also a symbol of Quebec separatism) is being roasted over an open fire, a bit like the bloc quebecois (well they were a few weeks ago). The footballs represent the anglophones (Quebeckers aren't really into football) watching the spectacle.

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered Commentersunny12

I saw a couch...

www.trialsofahorsegirl.blogspot.com

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterTheHorseGirl

Okay, I tried to post this already and it gave me trouble, so I hope I'm not double posting.

A football team somehow traveled back in time, got miniaturized and turned into stone, and then used to build a fireplace at Versailles. Yes?

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterorianna2000

I see a sofa with an ottoman. Crawling out from underneath this living room furniture, I see numbered beetles. I'm not sure what the fleur-de-lis is doing on the sofa, but perhaps it's actually a sofa and ottoman from Versailles. This is depicting the overthrow of the royal family and the aristocracy during the French Revolution. We must show our new-found patriotism for "Liberty, Fraternity, and Equality" by showing these nasty beetles crawling all over the queen's favorite sofa. (The ottoman's such a horrid color to depict how the people walked all over it to show how these despise Marie Atoinette.)

~P

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered Commentersignedp

It represents the tyrannical Football Fan, who watches football from his giant, fleur-de-lis decorated couch. He is supported on the backs of all the football players, who labor all their lives, doing his bidding and following his every whim.

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterClare K. R. Miller

I was going to say steak and lobster, though why there's a fleur de lis on there is anyone's guess!

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterStephanie

Uhhh Yeah....
Dante's Inferno: Circles of Hell -football style?!?! (He must have loved football more than his wife)

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterHope

Its a memorial cake - somewhere a bunch of football players were hit by a flying, meteor type breadroll?????

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterLiesl Kruger

I'm guessing the Scouts (fleur de lis) Football team (helmets) are having a barbecue (orange things are prawns, brownish thing is... ribs? steak? who knows) at moonrise (white thing on top). Must be a pagan thing.

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterMorgan

I'm saying a Scout campfire, made by an obsessive Scout who insists on numbering all his/her branches.

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterLena

Um my guess is salmon and a steak?

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterJesse

It is a shot of Angelina Jolie, excpet for they ran out of cake and could only make the top of her turtle neck and her lips. The symbol on her lips was put there because the person who ordered the cake mentioned the person liked the Saints. As for the grey blob at the top, well that is, well you know how those cake decorators get lol. "Oh well I guess I just fill the rest in with grey", ROFL......but seriously, it is a stadium for the Saints I think.

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterSarah-Dayton,OH

It looks like a stadium, at a weird angle and very poorly done.

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterKore

It's wherever the New Orleans Saints play football.

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterCusegirl1999

To me it looked like bugs crawling out of a filthy mattress. Yet the sheets looked inexplicably bright and yellow.

Don't let those huge bedbugs bite!

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I think it's the Superdome. More specifically, I think it's the Superdome after Hurricane Katrina.

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterlifeofleisa

Football stadium, would be my guess... aerial view.

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterDreams Come True

It's the bed that the NOLA Saints sleep in during the season . . . fosters team closeness don't'cha know.

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterRobynR

In the lesser known cult classic, "Little Shop of Horrors II: The Return of Audrey II, part II," only the lips of the fated fly-trap remain after the deadly showdown at the Superdome. In lasting tribute to a heroic Seymour, the lips (emblazoned with the symbolic fleur-de-lis used to slay the carnivorous plant) are hoisted onto a great BBQ, grilled, and marched through the town by the very same New Orleans Saints Audrey II had been attempting to devour.

Why someone would model a cake after this movie is beyond me. It went straight to video.

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterMichelle

I'm guessing a football stadium...with a fleur-de-lis? So, french-ish...so New Orleans Superdome?

Whatever it is, it's awful.

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterjadine

What I see a fleur de lis in a bed the some beetles so I'm guessing this is a French cake celebrating the at home birth of Egyptian god Ra who is represented here on earth by a scarab (fancy word for dung beetle which is a fair assessment of this cake, non!)

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterHelen + ilana = Hi

I know exactly what that is. Its a swanky hotel bed in NY city... the cockroaches are a dead giveaway!!

:D

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterKelipso

I think it is a very stale hamburger bun under grilled salmon, moldy cheese, and a steak, all cut in the same dimensions. It is surrounded by huge cockroaches, which have begun with the steak for obvious reasons. The top bun has already been eaten away. The Fleur-de-Lis means this past paragraph should have been in French, so actually it should be:


un pain d'hamburger très éventé sous les saumons grillés, le fromage moisi, et un bifteck, tout coupe dedans les mêmes dimensions. Elle est entourée par les cancrelats énormes, qui ont commencé par le bifteck pour des raisons évidentes. Le pain supérieur déjà a été érodé. Le Fleur-de-Lis signifie que ce paragraphe passé devrait avoir été en français

(I used an online translator, I'm not fluent)

--P.F.

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterPetrus Faber

I'm going with French couch.

That's the Boy Scout fleur-de-lis, right? So that makes this cake a memorial to all the Boy Scouts who have died at tailgate parties.

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterLibrary Supporter

The NOLA Superdome after the Invasion of the Hot Dog People forced a redecoration. The first ever Wiener Bowl is scheduled for next week. Should be a good game; the Johnsonville Brats vs. the Dirty Water Dogs.

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterdaundelyon

A...coffin? Wait, there are football helmets around it. A football player's coffin? Wait, that looks like a Fleur de lis on top of it. A...French football player's coffin?

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAmanda

I thought it was a trilobite or some kind of prehistoric arachnid being split open by an invisible cleaver engraved with a fleur-de-lis. It looks like it's getting all carved up like a turkey on Thanksgiving Day.

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterCalantha

It's kind of like that scene in the Wizard of Oz, but instead of the house falling on the Witch, the Superdome fell on the team! Oh no!

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterJust A Midwife

I think it looks like someone who is hiding under the covers of their bed, with their bottom sticking out a bit from under the comforter. Why are they hiding under the covers? Cuz there are a bunch of little freaky cockroaches crawling out from under the bed! Right? ;)

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterRoberta

It’s a scene from the French interpretive film based on the Wizard of Oz, and a nice illustration of how some concepts don’t translate well across cultural borders. Given that, allow me to explain… French art film director Pierre Gateaux has reinterpreted the American classic for the French market. In the new version, American football has invaded France as the new sports rage, and is suppressing interest in soccer among French fans. While the French authorities struggle vainly to defeat the invading sports mania, fate offers up a solution.
At the direction of an eccentric French wizard, a freak tornado whisks up a giant version of a Louis XIV divan (you can tell it’s authentic by the stripped fabric and the fleur de lis) and drops it on a visiting American football team, crushing the evil sports invaders into paté. Whereupon the soccer players storm the field, ripping off their shirts and a singing a rousing tune about the irony of bourgeois American fads being defeated by French antique furniture.
This lovely cake was commissioned to celebrate the release of the film.
Megan M

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered Commentermegan m

My honey said it looked like a fireplace but I'm going to guess by the... what are those? Olives? Is it the Superdome?

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterRenée

Eesh. I thought it was a casket.

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterKimberly

Duh, it's the head of a casket for a New Orleans Saints fan!!!

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered Commentermonster

Miniature football players carrying an oversized grill --- already heated --- to the tailgate party????

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterStephanie L.

Superdome in NOLA with football helmets that look like olives.

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterMarie

um a "grill the saints party?"

i think it is supposed to be the superdome, but i am not really sure why the grass? is brown and there is all that red and yellow, I am pretty sure that this is the cake of an "anti-saints" fan, hence the blood of the smushed and decapitated players spewing out of the dead grass. oh, the the beautiful grey tombstone!

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterdiddlesgirl

Le Jellyfish Francois Amputee.

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterMedTek

my first thought was the monster book from Harry Potter. but I couldnt figure out why there was a fireplace poker in the middle of it.
then I thought maybe a grill? but why should the grill be numbered? are you supposed to place your meat by number? no wonder I never grill well!

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterdiddlesgirl

This is a health lesson. The bottom brown thing is a lung desimated by years of smoking and has cancer so bad the air sac can hardly inhale/exhale.
The second lung is of someone who has just started smoking, so the lines are yellow. They have not turned that putrid color yet.
The top lung is what a healthy lung looks like. Unfortunately the baker has no clue what direction the brochi in the lung branch out.
As for the symbol, that is the symbol on the cancer clinic that funded the study.
The oval things all around with the stripes look like the pills you will have to take to stave off the nausea from the chemo. The numbers under them are the amount of treatments you will have to have.
I don't know about you, but I don't want any of the cancerous lung cake.

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered Commenternutcase68

I agree with Tanya, it is soooo Gulliver's sleeping bag!!!!!!

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterdiddlesgirl

Mick Jagger after he grew a beard and braided it.

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterMark Whybird

my first thought was a taco. it was followed immediately by the idea that it was a bed with the top sheet turned down. and some really ugly pillows.

October 6, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterJaime

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