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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Entries in Missed Marks (398)

Wednesday
Jan302019

7 Bakers Tackle A Football Helmet, Somehow We All Win

Sometimes the Universe forces your hand, minions, and with the Superbowl charging down on us this week I'm left with no choice but to acknowledge the elephant in the bakery:

Ok, that's supposed to be a helmet, but tell me you didn't see an elephant there for a sec.

 

Like the Superbowl itself, helmets are supposed to be, you know, bowl shaped. And yet...

This.

 

Any Disney fan worth her salt can tell you this is the Doom Buggy from the Haunted Mansion:

 

And there's no turning back now. MWUAHHAHAAAA.

Pac-Man's cousin, Whale-Barfing-Man.

 

After a while your brain starts to break, so I honestly can't tell anymore: does this look like a helmet?

Or does it look like a guy trying to see his own belly button?
(YOU'RE WELCOME.)

 

I feel like this baker made the eyes look like footballs - or the footballs look like eyes - just to keep us guessing:

I mean, if you turn this upside down, isn't that a field goal? So is this some mad genius at work? Are we simply to plebeian to appreciate the forward-thinking design of a sporting savant?

 

And is this a wang?

I mean, I see a wang. Not a healthy one. Not necessarily even a human one. But definitely in the wang-adjacent department, is what I'm saying.

Which would bring a whole new meaning to "get your head in the game," am I right? Heyooooo.

 

Well, I hope you enjoyed these less-than super head bowls, minions. Stay tuned, and maybe next time I'll throw some wreckerator-assembled footballs your way:

Oh yeah, it's gonna be a home. RUN.

 

Thanks to Amanda V., Teri D., Angela L., Jennifer, Kacia L., Rachel & Kelly, Sara S., & Jen S. for using their heads. Snerk.

*****

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Friday
Jan252019

Mama MIA!

Tabitha G. ordered a Mario cake for her five-year-old's birthday party.

You know Mario, right?

Yeah. This guy.

 

And that's when things went horribly, hilariously wrong:

"Did-a somebody call-a a plumber?" [eyebrow waggle]

 

No, no, take a moment. Soak it alllll in. The leather biker hat. The earring. The collar. The nipple and gratuitous chest hair. Oh yeah, and the fact that his lower half is on backwards. (Why? WHY??)

How did this happen? Why does this art even exist? And seriously, what the heck is going on with that front butt?

The world may never know.

We DO know the bakery replaced The Village Mario here with a free Spongebob cake, though.

So Tabitha, just one question:

Was SpongeBob wearing a gimp suit? :D

*****

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