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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Tuesday
Mar292011

In Moderation

Each day here on Cake Wrecks, we get literally tens of comments. Some days, if the post is particularly funny (read: offensive) we get even more. And, most of the time, these comments fall into one of several categories. Let's take a look, shall we?

Good commenters
--------------------------------------
The Enthusiast:

"BWAHAHAHAHA!!! LOVE IT!!! I literally threw up a little bit in my mouth, spit coffee all over my keyboard, and peed my pants. BEST. POST. EVAH!!!"

The Informer:

"The design on cake #2 is actually a perfect reproduction of the ficus remidius leaf found in Northern Kentucky between the months of June and August in a little patch of forest near Lake Onomakahatitikaka.

"Nice post, though."

The Optimist:

"At least the writing is pretty! And the balloons don't look like sperm!"

The Storyteller:

"Great post! It reminds me of this trip I took to Prague in 1982 with my cousin's roommate and Charlie Sheen. It was the dead of winter, I had a sombrero and a waffle iron and only four bullets left in my clip, and...well, to make a long story short, I still don't know what happened to that hooker's pet monkey."

Bad commenters
---------------------------------------

The Name Builder:

"Mike Johnson thinks this cake is terrible. Mike Johnson can't believe it. Mike Johnson wouldn't eat that cake if someone gave it to Mike Johnson for Mike Johnson's birthday! Mike Johnson Mike Johnson Mike Johnson Mike Johnson"

The Newbie:

"Um, I'm pretty sure that's "Epcot" from Disney (you can tell by the Disney font), and I don't see ANY daisies. Plus, what's the deal with those babies sitting on carrots? Looks a bit off, if you ask me."

The Spammer:

"Thank you for the information! Very informative! Free Viagra! Free Nikes! Buy Pharmacy Meds Cheap! Jessica Alba Nude!"

Thanks to Ticia, Darla D., Kelli P., Lauren H., Amanda J., Drew C., & Melissa K., who will now all be leaving wholly original comments about Charlie Sheen's new pet monkey.

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Reader Comments (136)

I forgot to look at the cakes this time.

March 29, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMissNay

Great post! Very informative! Check out my blog with tons of Nekkid pictures of Angelina Roberts! Also it's actually spelled OnomaCahatitikaka, not OnomaKahatitikaka, common mistake.

WV Versh-I don't have a definition, I just like the way this sounds... versh! versh!! VERSHHHHH!!

March 29, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterCatstina

I laughed so hard at "The Storyteller" that I choked on my own saliva! Thank you for that laugh, I needed it.
y

March 29, 2011 | Unregistered Commentery

You didn't include the kind that irritates me the most: people (the same two whom I won't name and an occasional bonus poster) who rewrite your post for you EVERY day. I find it really rude and arrogant.

March 29, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterJC Doo

I'm pretty sure I'm a pop up commenter. I post once in a while with random meaningless comments. So would I be a whack-a-mole commenter?

Rick Astley wins the comment section. That is all. :)

March 29, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterMaureen

Hmm. The sad thing is, I've been reading this for ages...I've read every single post, though I normally only read the first 20 or so comments...yet I still don't get the Epcot thing. I've been trying and trying to figure it out, but I'm still lost.

I feel left out.

March 29, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

A little afraid to comment, but at least I *hope* I fall into the "good" categories... and we must have a little humor at our own expense every now and then :)

I am 100% sure I love the 95% cake and must have this the next time a friend leaves work.

oh, and @Scrapopotomous, I totally agree! Great humor!

March 29, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAlma

Couldn't the Informer category be named for that famous/infamous informer from Cheers, Cliff Clavin who was always ready to share "a little known fact"?

March 29, 2011 | Unregistered Commentermn_me

I'm about to be one of the newbie commenters...
What's the whole Mike Johnson thing? I don't get it. :(

March 29, 2011 | Unregistered Commentermackenzie.

I love how folks commenting that now they are afraid to comment are...commenting!

I'm usually a lurker, myself.

March 29, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterCHRP

There's a couple of groups I've noticed that haven't been mentioned.

First of all, we have The Ninjas - anonymous commenters who don't sign their names anywhere in their comments. They are usually, although not always, in one of the bad categories.

Then there's a group I like to call the TL:DRs - people who don't read the comments and pump up the current Epcot to threat level red.

wv: woakie - a wookiee that is no longer asleep

March 29, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterWolverine Girl

M. Dale, it's all in the comments! If it says "Epcot, twitch twitch" as Jen's late-addition to the post, there's stuff in the comments.

I try not to be anonymous, but I am blog-less and I don't think I have a google account. Hm.

March 29, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterKatie

You should add "The corrector" to include all these idiots who felt the need to add categories to your already great post.

Why do people feel the need to add their own spin on things? Ugh.

And yes, I DO see the irony/hypocrisy in my first sentence.....

March 29, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterHonest Ed.

the hooker's pet monkey runs an Italian bakery in Kabul & his uncle is a dentist who specializes in cracked molars.

-Barbara Anne

March 29, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

The last one was actually quite pretty...I'm 95% sure of it ;) lol

March 29, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAdorably Dead

You forgot the "I'm just posting because the word verification was just too good to pass up."

March 29, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Okay, so I just posted the missed WV thing and my new and improved WV comes up- Drum roll please.....

WV:cowduc- I think that is what is on the 17th cake.
What the cow did when it saw the mad bride throwing her wedding cake from yesterday's post.

You also missed the "I love you John/ I love you Jen" comments.

March 29, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Sure, the balloons on the third cake dont look like sperm, but I kept thinking that they look like goldfish crackers.

March 29, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterCarolyn

Thanks for the Bonus Fun provided in the Spammer links! The links were quite appropriate, and just as funny the second+ time around!
2 Enthusiastic Thumbs Up!!!

March 30, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterjillb-ilslp

Lol! I can't stop making typos now thank you :D. That storyteller rose cake was kinda pretty. The first one looks like something out of Plants vs. Zombies. It would kill the zombies that is for sure lol.

March 30, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterArlene

Aw, anonymous at 8:05. There's a handy FAQ's that explains Epcot, and mohawk babies, etc.: http://www.cakewrecks.blogspot.com/p/faq.html

March 30, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterKatie

@M. Dale, @Anonymous 8:05pm, and others who don't understand what EPCOT is all about: I too was in the dark about EPCOT, until I happened to read the FAQ section (link is on the top menu). Jen provides links to the entries and comments you need to read in order to understand what it's all about. (You'll need a couple of hours to get through it all, though, as there are about 500 comments to read.) :)

Oh wow, does this comment make me an Informer?

@theangelJean 6:54pm, thanks for clearing up the Mike Johnson question...now I can get a good night sleep. Also, your links were great.

March 30, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterKati

I'm sure moderating the comments is a time-consuming job. Thanks for all the great posts and hard work. Glad to see that you're maintaining your sense of humor. :)

March 30, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterhyphen8

And a new category emerges: the commenter whose wit earns him a cult following. To wit: Craig.

WV: blagise--Those who have insufficient wit to author their own blogs often blagise the entries of others.

March 30, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterLinda in Louisville

I definitely fall into the newbie category....Will someone explain the Mike Johnson thing to me?

March 30, 2011 | Unregistered Commentersisserydoo

How about the Reference Checker, who is always grateful for the reference to ______ , which once in a while I'm not so sure was even there?

March 30, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

There are always more categories that you can add, but that's a great subset of them!

March 30, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterDale

Sometimes I just come on this wonderful blog (and I read it) in order to get to your other Steampunk-er blog.
(I refuse to bookmark or add to favorites...Don't want "Da Man" to find out where I surf...Ya, know what I mean?)(Don't worry though, I do preach the good word about your stuff to my associates)

So as the good Doctor (10) says, "Alonzi!"

March 30, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterReceptionist Row

That didn't look anything like Jessica Alba.

March 30, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterwarren

Okay, now I feel self conscious about commenting -- like I'm back in gradeschool...

March 31, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

You guys make me laugh.
That's why I keep coming back.
Thanks

March 31, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterlawnajo

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!

March 31, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I knew there was no way you would actually link to some weird porn site, so when I realized "Jessica Alba Nude" was an actual hyperlink, I had to find out what it went to. Thanks for the giggle!
Marvelous, just marvelous :)

March 31, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterSemiDomesticMiss

You guys are the funniest! Love you...in a non creepy way!!! LOL

March 31, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterBrenda

I, for one, would love a story involving Charlie Sheen, Prague, and cake!

April 1, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterThe Jen

Offended Anonymous: the commenter who is too chicken shizz to leave his/her name for fear of being called out on it.

April 11, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterBrandy

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