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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Wednesday
Dec082010

The Sign Post

Better watch out for this bakery, henchpersons:

I hear they'll hang you out to dry.

"TELL US HoW WE ARE DOing.."


"An O you co-A WIN... " uh, some assorted scribbles.

Hey, uh, guys?

YOU'RE ON CAKE WRECKS.

What's that tell you?

Now, tell me what the mystery blob with the vaguely butterfly-like thing on it is supposed to be, and we'll call it even.

The bakers wielding the pastry bags aren't the only culprits, though:

I've seen a lot of these cakes. They live up to their name.


Aw, now why is "home made" in quotes? From that gooey ooze dripping out the bottom I can tell it's JUST like "home made." (Love you, Mom!)

*sigh*

Personally I don't see how you can use a "thank you," no matter WHICH underwear it might belong to.

(Give it a minute.)

(Theeere it is.)



Hey, Melissa P., Jennifer D., April G., Dani, Kelsey H., & Claire M., there's your sign.

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Reader Comments (104)

I think I'd actually buy a Chocolate Oblivious cake. Think of the fun of giving it as a gift to someone who doesn't notice the label!

December 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterGloom Raider

Oblivious cake? What cake? I don't see any cake...

December 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Thanks for giving me the laugh that I needed this morning!

December 8, 2010 | Unregistered Commentertina

I just startled all my animals while laughing maniacally at the thong's. Typos are wonderful things. What, you say they aren't typos?? Oh.

Thanks for the great laughs today and every day, Jen.

December 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterKeeley

Even if they'd spelled tongs right, it STILL wouldn't require an apostrophe.....{sigh}....

When such enormities are committed by native speakers, it amazes me that non-native speakers manage to learn English at all.

Cake Wrecks has reinforced my own principle never to serve store-bought baked goods!

December 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJoanna

so do you win $2.00 or $200?? (or $20.00 or $2000??)

December 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

"Oblivious cake" What Sten meant when he said "There is no cake. The cake is a lie." And yes I know that's originally from Bioshock (I think :P) but I'm a Dragon Age fan. Anywho I think that crazy blob is supposed to be "And you can win $2000 dollars" But that's just a guess.

December 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterPsycho

I'd rather use the jockstrap's thank you, it's subdued but completely exposed and honest. The thong's thank you has a tendancy to creep up and surprise you... :P

December 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJohn

I agree with Gloom Raider.

December 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterThe Boob Nazi

I live near a cake shop called "Pisa Cake", except the sign is in fancy script, and looks more like it says "Piss Cake". How appetizing.

December 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterLouisa

I hope three inches is the height, not the diameter.

Where were these photos taken? Not in the U.S., I hope.

December 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterClassic Steve

umm is it a pot of gold with a leprechaun popping out?? It kind of looks like a person....or not. lol

December 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAmbitious Blonde

oh wow--that first photo wouldn't have happened to come from a bakery in East Cambridge MA, would it?

December 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterKaren

Thong's Thank You!! BWahahahahaaaaaaaaaaa

Oh my.. I needed that today!!

Thank you. (from me, not my thong)

AH, this world in which we live in - makes me wonder how anything ever gets done if this is the usual manner of distributing information.

~~Di

wv - pholyp -- not sure why this makes me think of the fountain with a pissing cherub on each side of it?

December 8, 2010 | Unregistered Commentermladybright

Thank goodness the screen cleaning spray and microfiber cloth were close at hand since my computer wore a half a cup of hazelnut coffee when I got to the "thong's" picture.

Really, really, really must remember not to drink coffee when reading Cake Wrecks.

December 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAmy

yep, my guess was a cauldron and a leprechaun hat.

December 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMama Rizzo

Love this post! Thanks for the laugh!

December 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterRobin

The bag...the bag...CAN'T BREATHE IN BOLD LETTERS....ROFL.....

December 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterThe Litwillers

psyho it's not Bioshock it's portal yes the cake is a lie

December 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMonique

I can see people at the local mega-mart using cheetah print thongs to take rolls out of the bin!!!

December 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

OMG you actually got me with the "give it a minute" on the Thong's

Snort.

Thanks for making a crappy day better!

December 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterElizabeth C.

Nothing like some horrible punctuation and incorrect word usage to brighten my day! :)

December 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterKB

is that an Egyptian duck wanting feedback? This is a great post!

December 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterZia Madeira

Call me Master of the Obvious (or maybe Master of the Oblivious) but can something in a grocery story plastic container, really be called "Home Made"

I'm sorry I typed it out loud.

December 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMary Connealy

My first guess was squished cowboy boot, but that doesn't make any sense. The $2.00, $20.00, $2000 ambiguity is so people will THINK it is $2000 and then they draw the winner and announce it really says $2.00.

I believe Chocolate Oblivious cake should be Chocolate Oblivion. That is slightly less lethal than Death By Chocolate Cake. The 3-inch size is to keep some of us from eating large amounts in one sitting.

December 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterTricia L

I'd wear the last one on a T-shirt. Hint, hint, hint...

December 8, 2010 | Unregistered Commentersnarkygurl

Always a good part of my morning. Thong's... OMG!

December 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterValerie

Leprechaun and pot?
No, I see a big brown apple with a leaf and stem at the top.
I'm guessing it might be the store logo or something?

December 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterBin

Thanks to Joanna I won't be wondering WTF on the thong's (sic) all day long!

I think that "butterfly" thingy is actually a snail.

December 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I wish someone could cast obliviate on the oblivious cake.
Also, the cookie seems to be offering a 2000 bill, which could refer to a made up piece of money, you owing them money, or an ex-president. The mind boggles.

December 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterDanger Boy

Ooh, I see your Doctor Who reference there... :)

December 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJennifer

"the thong's thank you" BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! And John's comment about the jock strap - BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

December 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMarcy W.

..was going to say it looks like a turkey, but I think Mama Rizzo is right.

December 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

The laundromat has "Happy Birthday" banners hanging over the wedding cakes.

@Classic Steve:
Sorry, but $ currency + bad English leaves little doubt about the origin. Canadia and Austrialand have better English.

December 8, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterjohn

Let's see...looks to me like the ambiguous cookie design is in a coffee shop so.... i still got nothin' :P (Maybe a tea kettle!??? You know, being that it looks nothing like a tea kettle!)

December 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterLaurenH

What puzzles me is how a Chocolate Oblivious cake doesn't expire for over a month. What is IN that??

December 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterTFC

A Thong's thank you isn't worth a Tinker's damn.

December 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Er, I believe the "butterfly thing" is a leprechaun's hat, and the big brown thing is a cauldron, full of gold.

wv: mintend - These cakes mintend to be "home made".

December 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterPenelope

I think the cookie blob is a badly drawn money bag. The blob itself is the bag, the butterfly body/hat brim thingy is the tie, and the wings/hat thingy is the gathered part of the bag. Fits with the ambiguous give-away context.

December 8, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterbarn

The "chocolate oblivious" (great name, actually) cake came from the Ben Lomond Market in Scotts Valley, California. Notice that the name of the town should be "Scotts Valley", not "Scott's Valley". Incorrect cake nomenclature AND incorrect punctuation, double score!

December 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

*reads caption*

(Give it a minute.)

(Theeere it is.)

*scratches head* "Huh?"
*re-reads photo*
*re-reads caption*
*re-reads photo*
*re-reads cap-*

"ohhh...I get it!!!":D

Your timing is that of an impossibly incredible comedian. High-hilarity, as always! :D

December 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterStoich91

I think the butterfly thing might be a thumbs-up turned on its side...

December 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJen

On the feedback cookie, I see a snail on a brown apple. How are they doing? If the business in question is a bakery, not so great. May I have my prize now?

Oh wait -- it says "you can win $2,000... bill?" Since there is no $2,000 currency in the normal universe, maybe the winner gets to pick up someone's really big tab. Think I'll pass.

Banana bread shouldn't leak, "home made" or otherwise. Why do I sense a Sandra Lee influence here. Funny how 'Sandra Lee' and 'influence' seem to go together...

"Combine bananas and marshmallows. If you don't have bananas, you can use plantains. If you don't have those either, just use whatever you do have. But you have to use marshmallows -- the bigger, the better.

Dump the marshmallow-and-whatever mixture on store-bought angel food cake and serve."

December 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterCraig

These are just too funny - love Bob Engvall reference too!

1. I wonder if you can "drop your pants here"? (a local dry cleaners has this on their sign).

2. Egads! My eyes hurt from trying to read that! I think it says $2,000 dollars. Sigh. Having $ and writing out the word dollars with it? Really?

3. *Snort* @ Gloom Raider!

4. What IS that yellow blob under the words supposed to be? Is that supposed to resemble a banana? FAIL.

5. *Facepalm* I guess they reeeaaaallly want you to know there is wheat and soy in that product.

6. ROTFLMBO! And when you're finished with the "thong's" you can have them cleaned at Maria's Laundromat!

wv: hualic: I'm a Cake Wrecks-hualic!

December 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterLoo-E Loo-I

Ha! I had it right away. Awesome.

December 8, 2010 | Unregistered Commenteryodafatkitty

I'm sorry. I HAVE to make the joke.

At least you know your cake won't have any dirty jokes!

December 8, 2010 | Unregistered Commenteralex-atlantis

Ok people, I don't care if it is a laundered thong, please don't use it to pick up dinner rolls. (no I don't care about the possesive :-)

December 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterLetitia

there's a sign out here that actually says Ho-Made pies... cracks me up every time!

December 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterT

the butter fly thing is a leprechaun hat, the thing with the writing on it is "a pot of gold"

December 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I actually think the buterfly blob is a turkey

December 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterLinda V @ Bubble and Sweet

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