Wedding Missed Marks, Vol. 458

Ever seen Cornelli lace? It's this pretty icing technique Jennifer wanted on her wedding cake:

But instead, her baker got a little really drunk and had a silly string party:

Bottom Tier: "Hey, I think I'm actually better after a few drinks!"

Middle Tier: "MOAR BEER MOAR STRINGY THINGS WHEEEE"

Top Tier: [face down on the counter, blindly spraying icing all over the room]

Meanwhile...

Kimberly decided on something a little more rustic for her wedding:

...but this really goes against the grain:

And Brittany T. ordered this loveliness for her wedding cake:

You must admit, her baker did a crackin' job:

o.0

Also, if you watch those embedded BBs long enough, I'm pretty sure they'll slowly sink into the cake and disappear, ala the La Brea Tar Pits.

Who's hungry?

Thanks to Jennifer H., Kimberly W., & Brittany T. for fueling bride-to-be nightmares everywhere.

*****

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And from my other blog, Epbot:

Spring Love Is In Despair

So now that Spring is officially here, you know what's coming, right?

That's right: wedding season.

[rubbing hands together gleefully]

BRING ON THE WEDDING WRECKAGE!

Let's kick things off with a lovely Spring Fling inspiration:

...that in execution got a little, well, flung:

I like to imagine that this was delivered on the back of the baker's scooter, and that those smushed fondant butterflies on the sides were all tragic road casualties. Because, somehow, that actually makes this more excusable/believable.

What the baker says:

"Yes, I can do that!"

What the baker means: 

"Yes, I have some shiny ribbon!"

 

Maybe at the reception they shone a spotlight on the ribbon so the glare would blind all the onlookers. That's what I would do.

Oh, hey...maybe that was the baker's plan all along!

Bride: "That looks TERRI..."

Baker: [flashing ribbon]

Bride: "I CAN'T SEE! Where'd you go? Are you here? Where's the cake? Hey! WHERE'S MY PURSE?!"

[sound of running feet]

This next one could be a metaphor for life and love in so many ways. Not that I mean anything by that, fellas. 'Cuz I don't. So never mind. In fact, can we not talk about this anymore, please? It's just a cake, ok? SHEESH.

EXPECTATION:

REALITY:

Waw-waaaaaw.

Because wedding cakes are like marriages: some settling may occur.

Thanks to Valentina V., Michele W., & Paula B. for sharing their wedding day woes. We're here for you, ladies. Right after we finish laughing.

*****

Thank you for using our Amazon links to shop! USA, UK, Canada.

And from my other blog, Epbot: