BREASTS OF FURY
December 4, 2012 I don't know about you, but when *I* get an e-mail with "BREASTS OF FURY" in the subject line, I tend to read that one first.
Happily, this particular submission didn't disappoint:
They DO seem kinda angry...
Sadly Melanie T. didn't include an explanation for her cake, so we're left to devise our own theories - and in book title format, of course.
Here, I'll get us started:
1) When Fembots Attack
2) Put Out Your Heart Light, and Turn On Your Head Lights
3) Shelly the Turtle/Airplane Hybrid and the Exploding, Somewhat Leaky BAZOOMS OF DOOM!! (Now With Balloons!)
K, the floor is now open. YOUR TURN.
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IMPORTANT 12/10 UPDATE: Melanie tells she went back to the same store this week and saw *another* cake, same drawing and everything, in the case. So she broke down and asked the baker what the heck it's supposed to be. You'll never guess. Are you ready? Like, really REALLY ready?
It's a walrus. Allegedly.
Please, scroll on up there and see if YOU can figure it out. 'Cuz I'm still stuck doing this:
Also, I need more Bill Murray gifs in my life - although he'll always be Peter Venkman to me. ;)
Reader Comments (199)
Sad, fat Iron Man holding a pair of giant earrings with his backwards hands
omg omg omg! We used to draw those all the time in middle school! Mamories...
Sadly, the Michelin man's wife's implants didn't work out so well.
First, the obligatory song...
Big "girls" don't cry
Big "girls" don't cry
Bi-ig "girls" don't cry-yi-yi
They get even...
I'm going to have to think of a good title -- my first thought was:
The Stay Puft Maidenform Man
Katy Perry: How I Lost Weight, Let Go of Anger and Learned to Use My Powers for Good.
When albino clowns take the squirting boutonniere gag to far!
Klaatu Barada Woman: The True Story of The Day the Earth Stood Still and Gort's
Valiant Struggle to Release the Woman Within.
Silly bloggers! You're looking at it upside down!
It's clearly a rabbit, with bent ears and a couple of ugly warts on its chin. And no nose. But at least it's smiling at us! Or maybe it's screaming?
@SuBee: You're KILLING me! Those are hilarious. (Now I'm gonna be mostly dead all day...)
"She's Still in There Somewhere: How to Survive Your Daughter's Teen Years.
First of all, I think the cake looks better turned upside down. Then it becomes some kind of animal figure with big ears, eyes, muzzle, whiskers, and droopy open mouth with two dots. But then you have to explain why the balloons have fallen to the floor. That being said, all I see are a pair of maracas with whiskers. "Save the Maracas!"
"She's Still in There Somewhere: How to Survive Your Wife's Menopausal Years"
Bah. When you posted a Fembots link, I was hoping for the originals!
All I could think about was this MST3K clip (just to be safe, I'll note that it may be NSFW): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_ePusmtf1IQ&feature=youtube_gdata_player
Seriously, the Bazooms of Doom??? Don't you know that they are properly called Bawockas? LOL!
Clown Punching Bags Fight Back! With Spikes of Chest!
Roboobcop Gets Festive
It's the chapter from "Breastfeeding 101" entitled "Yes, You Can Explode if You Wait Too Long to Nurse Your Child!"
My wife saw this from across the room and thinks she has it: Spin it 180 degrees and it's a badly done Bugs Bunny!!!
What a let down....
Wait - book title improvement on my pun:
What A Let Down - When Nursing Isn't What You Expected.
To most people, she's mild-mannered new Mom, Bryce Banner. But, after a horrible accident with an electric breast pump, whenever she sees someone bottle-feeding a baby, she becomes...
THE INTOLERABLE MILK
"Don't make me leaky. You won't like me when I'm leaky."
Is that cake . . . lactating stars? What kind of occasion would that be for? I don't even.
The baby slept through the night for the first time and my breasts have exploded!!!
As someone named Shelli, I take offense to the third one. It is clearly a MANATEE/Airplane hybrid, not a a Turtle/Airplane. Don't you know your zoology?
It could also be seen as Black Friday 2: Revenge of the Discounted Rotating Fans. In Soviet Russia, Fans shop you!
A manatee stripper with those swirly things on her boobs. But...manatees nurse under their arm pits. Yes, weird, but true...
This is a picture of me after attempting to make those string balloons that are all over Pinterest! Note the glue-covered string stuck to my ample bosom, which always seems to get in the way of craft projects, and the popped balloons hanging from the sticky mess.
You just have to wonder who thought that drawing was a good idea. It doesn't even look like it's from the bakery that must not be named.
If I try hard, I can see a monkey with a really weird hat.
Anyway, titles:
Everything You Never Wanted to Know about Thrush
What Now? When He says No
Though SuBee's already taken the good ones. Great job, SuBee!
OMG they are leaking!
What They Forgot to Tell You About Nursing
"The mythbusters were forced to revise their report, and admit that sometimes implants CAN explode due to changes in cabin pressure"
That is clearly a figure from an IKEA lighting fixture self-assembly manual circa 1975.
Oh my god.
I laughed so hard I peed a little.
Batman's newest nemesis: Lactose, The Intolerant....
@SuBee: you are on a roll!!!
@zoomom: lol
"How to Play The Electric Maracas: for Dummies"
The sheriff was right: they DO usually travel in pairs.
I see a mouse sipping from a straw wearing some sort of hat. Turn it over and it's a cross between rigged and bugs bunny. Coffee not working today so I can't think of any titles but those posted are hilareous!
'The Tit and the Pendulum' - a horror story by Poe's sister Ellen, documenting a female prisoner's torture at the hands of the Spanish Inquisition
'No-one expects the Spanish Inquistion!'
The Penguin Had Two Mirrors
Star Wars 6-Maraca Droids
Danger Will Robinson
SnowWomen-The Thaw
Casper the Lactating Ghost
I guess we'll just have to make the breast of a bad situation....
19 dollars and change for THAT.....
Didn't you hear? It's the new Olympic mascot. You should see the pole vaulting version.
Stacie - you need to sell your nursing title to soneone who is writing a breastfeeding book. It's perfect!
My (male) co-worker suggested it was a woman "soaping" herself in the shower. When asked why she was frowning, he said "she's disappointed in the quality of the soap." Obviously.
All I can see when I look at this is a ghost woman with leakage running for the bathroom. Good thing the yellow blobs are at the top of the cake! (bleh!)
"Casper's Bride: When Good Ghouls Go Bad"
It's a walrus. A really badly done walrus. Done by a baker who learned about walruses from the written descriptions of a blind explorer. Or, it's a really excellent cake baked for someone who ordered a picture of exploding breasts with silicone leaking down like tears.
Nobody told MJ that if she was bit by the radioactive spider, the webbing came out from there.
@SuBee/Sharyn/Stacie: Bravo.
It's a doodle....Kilroy nurses here!
"Melissa the Angry Mermanatee"
Little known fact: Breasts of Fury's real title is The Big Bosom.