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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Saturday
Dec052009

The Yuletide is Coming In

Now that we're into December, bakeries are working hard to make their designs more "season-appropriate."

Which is why you can now find, for example, the army toys attacking giant poinsettias:

"Call in backup! We need more silly string!"

And flotsam-bedecked "Christmas guitars":

"Oh Oh Oh" is right.

And of course, that perennial holiday favorite:

The Puppy-Pecking Parasite of Pastries Past!

It's a deer tick.

Eh?

Oh, c'mon, quit groaning: that was freaking brilliant on my part.

Heather M., Melissa G., & Jessica L., do you suppose they used "sugar doe" to make it?

- Related Wreckage: Seasonal Non Sequiturs

« Sunday Sweets: Wintry Wonders | Main | Syfy Sacrilege »

Reader Comments (120)

Everyone has already said that the deer tick is brilliant, but as Epcots go, one declaring your brilliance has to be among the best.

I'll be puzzling for a while over who buys poinsettias with tanks, and for what occasion. I guess it would make a cute cake for a soldier celebrating an early Christmas with family before going on deployment, or a military-obsessed boys birthday cake that mome insists must blend in with holiday decor.

December 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAviatrix

Deer tick - that's hilarious!

December 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Okay, this is probably the funniest post I've seen here - made my morning. :-)

December 5, 2009 | Unregistered Commentereats-veggies

Deer tick-I love it! Can't fathom what reason someone would have to put a plastic animal on a frosting mountain... but it made my day so I'm glad people are still demented!

December 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

@Anon10:14, that red mess looks nothing like the state of West Virginia.. no Eastern Panhandle.

I go with Jen on the 'guitar' thing, or maybe a tennis racquet that's been used to administer a beat-down (thus explaining the decapitated flotsam and the bloody mess of it all)

For #1, 'peace on Earth, good will to those with the biggest guns'?

As for 'deer tick' isn't just making us -look- at it punnishment enough? (Yes, this is me being jealous that I didn't come up with it before reading that you already had XD )

wv - inifaili - the 'fail' part just says it all.

December 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMiki

My daughters thought the white fuzzy mountain was the Abominable Snowman from the Rudolph movie...

"The Puppy-Pecking Parasite of Pastries Past!" ROFLMAO
I love the alliteration!

*snicker* deer tick....

also love the army toys and silly string and the comment about lava eating the flotsam on the guitar.

December 5, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterjoanne

Deer Tick! HAHAHAHAHAHA! That was brilliant!

Oh Oh Oh...my new greeting for the season :)

December 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAmy Rainey

Nice!
Amy B-H

December 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAmy

Poinsettias on Poop - what a novel idea. And the addition of army vehicles made it all the more festive.

Loved the deer tick.

December 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterEllen

First wreck: I actually like the combination of poinsettias and tanks. Just not half-assedly executed on a giant pile of poo.

Second wreck: Is that a Christmas-themed West Virginia?

Third wreck: Puns are evil. :c

December 5, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterdogface

Ah, nothing says Christmas like tanks and silly
string!

And a Deer Tick! Poor pup.

I only cringe when I laugh, Jen. ;-)

December 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterHobbit

I am not in the least bit ashamed to admit that I laughed aloud at "deer tick."

On the other hand...how the ohohoh did you know that Thing was once a guitar?

December 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterFlartus

Deer tick. It's Epcot!

December 5, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterkadyb

I wasn't going to comment on any of they abominations, but the WV was so appropriate

kidiumi

These cakes were for sale? Are you kidiumi?

Plus, OH OH OH is sort of how I feel about these cakes.

December 5, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterdrgns4vr

okay, like others have said, the deer tick is genius. tiny deer on back of drippy dog? weird.

December 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterEtiquette Bitch

Ha ha ha! I thought "deer tick" was brilliant too!

December 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterSarah

I'm afraid that OHOHOH may be a watermelon leftover from about 5 months ago, now disguised for Xmas.

December 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJoe

Wow, these are truly horrendous. Normally you can at least tell what the wreck was, as in it was supposed to be SOMETHING and they just screwed up. This just look like cake supply store vomit.

Oh Oh Oh is pretty hilarious though.

December 5, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterzebe912

I think the red cake could be used to issue some kind of warning, somewhere along the line of, "Don't feed them after midnight."

December 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

oh oh oh indeed. And WTF, too. Does anyone really pay money for these? I could understand it, if you're taking them to hated in-laws, but other than that...wow, just wow.

December 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJelliDonut

That last one looks like a shaggy white snow elephant to me!

December 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterTeresa

I don't understand 'deer tick'. Can someone explain?

December 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJam Master Ghislaine

there's a salvation army joke here begging to be made.

December 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJenna

I think You have all missed the point. It is a Veterens Day cake! Don't you see the American flag in the lower right quadrant???? The "pointsettias" are explosions. and the silly string??? Tactical misdirection! VERRRY Interesting!

December 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterBelle T.

For the life of me I cannot figure out what these cakes are supposed to be. And WHY would a miniature reindeer be hitching a ride on a dog, exactly? WHAT IS WRONG WITH THESE BAKERIES? WHY! WHY DO THEY DO THESE THINGS?!?!?!? WHY!!!!!?

WV:iliturp: what they must be drinkin' to make these cakes

December 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJust Me,Pilgrim

That would only be a "puppy" pecking parasite if that was, in fact, a puppy.

It's very obvious that it's a rare long-haired albino anteater.

***

Dear Tick,

I enjoyed your cartoon. That other guy was a bunny, right?

signed,
Homophonia.

December 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterE.M. Green

Aviatrix and other international readers:
Every summer, Americans walk through the woods and fields in fear of the dreaded Ixodes scapularis -- the Deer Tick. If any beast is bitten by the bug, then they DIE of Lyme disease in the next ten minutes (slight exageration here.) And yes, Ixodes scapularis looks just like a tiny deer perching on its pitiful victims before lunging in to suck their blood.

December 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMJS

Hahaha, as a vet student, I have to say that your 'deer tick' comment made me burst out laughing. Hilarious! :) Your blog always makes me smile! :D

December 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterTara Bergin

tanks attacking flowers? A deer mounting a dog?
Huh? I'm so confused.
vw: forype. the sound you make when you go to pick this up. "I had a lovely cake made forype what the ****!!!!

December 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterPaul

Should I be saddened that my two-year-old knew the last one was a dog?

December 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterKrista

The army attacking giant plants has to be a reference to Day of the Triffids, doesn't it?
Why you would make a cake of that, and a CCC at that, I really don't know.

December 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterRob

Deer Tick!!! I love it.

December 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterSAVanVleck

Is that last one the thing from The NeverEnding Story?

December 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

The first one looks like its on a poo cloud!

December 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAdrianna

"Peace on earth, goodwill toward men" but those evil poo dwelling mutant poinsettias are history!

December 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterWolvie Girl

hehehehehe, deer tick, heheheheheheh

December 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMichelle

I laughed out loud at Oh Oh Oh.
- Emmy

December 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I can't help it but cake #1 reminds me of 'The Santa Clause'
"Better look out this year, kids! Santa's coming to town in a PANZER!!!"

'deer tick' *snort* **wiping tea from screen**

BTW - as a NON-professional cake decorator -- I'm lovin' this site. It makes my cakes look divine.

December 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterBright

Old school Strawberry Shortcake shoutout! Awesome!

December 5, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterrae

I can't help but point out that not only is it silly to have tanks and helicopters on the first cake, but the poinsettias are also not even close to being right. I've seen white ones that look sort of green, but I've never seen or sold poinsettias that are green and orange. Of course, reality was clearly not a priority for the decorator.

Marnie

December 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Deer tick!! LOL! That IS brilliant! :D

December 5, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterKim

I check in every day but almost never comment. But I've gotta give you deer tick. That WAS brilliant. :)

December 6, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMary Connealy

OK time to 'fess up. Haven't ever heard of deer ticks, so I totally didn't get the joke.Instead, my brain made sense of it with "It's i-dio-tic". Brilliant, I thought!
.
.
.
New Year resolution: learn more about American stuff!

MC from NZ :)

December 6, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Please count my vote in on "Deer Tick" being one of the best captions ever!!!

December 6, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

It may be just me but this latest season (thanksgiving and Christmas) has been the worst (best?) season of wrecks ever.

December 6, 2009 | Unregistered Commentersophanne

deer tick! Funny!

December 6, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterCookieMonster

hah... I love the puppy parasite :)

December 6, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterCindy

Oh Oh Oh returns!

http://cakewrecks.blogspot.com/2008/12/totally-cheating.html

See? The Bottom Cake. Same piece of plastic and everything!

December 6, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterCube

I think the deer is doing inappropriate things to the little white doggie.

December 6, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Oh Oh Oh it's "magic"

-Christine

December 6, 2009 | Unregistered Commentertonychrissyabby

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