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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Entries in Missed Marks (411)

Tuesday
May142019

Oh Mer Gosh: It's Mer-Mania!

It's Mer-May, minions, so if you're a half-fish lady with donut hair... NOW IS YOUR TIME TO SHINE.

Livin' life on the edge! Of the cakeboard.

(And judging by that camera angle, also on the ceiling.)

Them: "Wow, that tail!"
Her: "Thanks, it has pockets."

 

Or perhaps you prefer Sea Men?

Extra Manly Sea Men. Heyooooooooo

Him: "How do I bring this camo tail and huntin' rifle to the next level?
Them: "HOLD MY BEER."

 

Which brings us to the most majestic of the mer folk. A creature so magnificent, so regal, so breathtaking, that it defies all description.

So I wrote a haiku instead.

Ahem hem hem.

Never have I seen
Such dignity in the sea
Blobfish in a wig

 

::bows::

 

Thanks to two Anony M.s & April S. for bringing Blobby back.

*****

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Tuesday
May072019

Must Love Minecraft

Look, minions, sometimes we customers ask for weird stuff on our cakes.

 

No, like really weird stuff.

(Not to mention weirdly ominous...?)

 

So you can't always expect your baker to know how to draw, say, Yoda from Star Wars in an Elvis Presley costume.

Although hot dang, that's not half bad.

 

Still, for all the curve balls we throw at our bakers, I don't think it's TOO much to expect them to know the super popular kids' stuff, right? Like Minecraft, that game with all the green pixelated dudes that every 10-year-old boy is obsessed with?

Exhibit A: An average Minecraft cake.

 

Which brings me to wreckporter Mary, who ordered Minecraft cupcakes for her son's class. She explained to her bakery that the class all loved Minecraft, and asked for a 4X4 grid of green squares on each cupcake. Nothing too fancy, just some basic Minecraft blocks.

Again, Mary asked for cupcakes. With Minecraft squares on them. No writing, no characters.

Ready to see what she got?

::evil grin::

 

This is my favorite part of every post, you guys. The ANTICI....

 

 

 

 

 

 

...PATION!

Ooooh.

Yowch.

It says "Class Love Birthday Minecraft," if that helps any.

It, uh, definitely didn't help the baker.

 

Thanks to Jessica R., Kim Z., Anony M., & Mary D. for reminding bakers everywhere that Google can be a wondrous thing. Just sayin'.

*****

Do you shop Amazon? Then how about clicking through my affiliate link to shop? USA, UK, Canada.

 Visiting Amazon through those links will help support the site, and costs you nothing. Thanks, guys!

And from my other blog, Epbot: