Tell Me What You Want, What You Really Really Want
July 11, 2017 Sometimes when a cake makes no sense, it's helpful to ask yourself, "What do you suppose the customer asked for?"
;)
Insults 101: When calling a girl a dog, it's always helpful to be breed-specific.
;)
(For what it's worth, I'm pretty sure that's not how Mrs. Hopperband spells her name.)
"Look, I just want what every girl wants for her birthday: a big- a$$ cake!"
;)
Eh. [shrugging] As I'm sure every cake-loving girl would agree: close enough. Pass the forks!
Sometimes you just want a sugary baked good for no reason at all. And yet, without an inscription, what can Wreckerators wreck? That's why they're so adamant that your cake say something.
And that's also why we get Wrecks like these:
;)
Give it a minute.
Jen B., Stephanie W., Autumn R., & Sara G., one "Ho Thing Special," comin' up.
*****
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Reader Comments (25)
Well, the big-a$$ cake /could/ have been a huge, fondant-covered 3-D version of a person's posterior, y'know.
Got any fire related wrecks? My province is on fire. Been evacd from my home for 6 days now. Need good laffs
Just slip the "Ho" thing under the door; we all want to see just how special she is....
=^-.-^=
How great would a band bride be? Just imagine how uniquely awesome a shako-inspired veil would look. (Shako is apparently the name for those marching band hats.)
Can squeeze on congratulations but not Hopperband. Gotcha.
Thanks for the "Big Ass Cake". I needed a Big Ass Laugh and this delivered. I'm sure my neighbors appreciated hearing me cackle for a full minute at full volume.
Yo, JennyDog - thanks for all you do!
(Maybe Jenny is a service animal?)
I am trying to figure out if that was supposed to be directions to place a BLOND bride or a BORED bride on the cake.
I'd eat the Big Ass Cake, not gonna lie.
mmm ...Wonder if it was supposed to possibly have a "blonde bride on it" ???
That last Wreck..... I read it as, "Hot hing special"...... not sure what a "hing" is.................
MaryO1230 :-) :-)
Just as long as it's a big-ass cake and not a big ass-cake. (Hat tip to Randall Munroe.)
The Big Ass Cake looks more than a little like the old logo for Big Ass Fans to me. And even if it wasn't, I'd totally still eat it.
All that dark icing... bitter taste on the "Big Ass Cake"!
That second one looks to me as if it says Bond bride.
"Do you expect me to talk?"
"No, Mr Bond, I expect you to marry me. And eat cake. Lots of cake."
And as for giving somebody a dessert declaring them Nothing Special, well, was it really necessary to be so Bassethoundy?
Not going to lie: I see Ho Thing wrong with Big Ass Cake!
Good thoughts to you, Wannek. We're getting smoke from the B.C. first here in north central Washington.
The local supermarket refused to put "Happy Birthday, Dirty Ho" on our friend's birthday cake!
If only the decorator of that second cake had stopped at 'Congratulations'. It's spelled correctly, it's straight, and it's not badly written.
Honestly, the bit a$$ cake is spectacular. I'd be super happy to receive it.
Not positive, but the Big A$$ Cake looks a lot like the logo on go-cups you can get from a place on Bourbon Street in New Orleans...
If the Big Ass Cake has Big Ass Icing on it, I'll eat it too!
Frankly that Big Ass Cake is rather well done.
I'm guessing that the "Basset Hound" on Jenny dog's cake is actually a reference to the movie "Madagascar: Escape 2 Africa":
Alex: Slow down! You're gonna kill us! There's got to be another way! Pass it on!
[the monkey chain relays the message up to the plane]
Mason: Don't slow down. Kill us. It's the only way. Basset Hound!
Skipper: The best sacrifice is the one made by others.
[Nana shoots through the plane's windshield and blows off the bobblehead doll's head]
Skipper: Doll! MEDIC!
[Private gets out the duct tape]
That said, I would have used parentheses... and spelled "Basset Hound" correctly!
Last one reads “nothing special”!