7 Seriously Ugly Wedding Wrecks To Make Your Day Better
December 27, 2017 Wow, you guys really like your wedding wrecks, don't you?
And by "your" wedding wrecks, I of course mean someone ELSE'S wedding wrecks.
Because you are terrible, terrible people.
We must be related.
Now, remember, a wedding cake is the most important cake in a person's blah-de-blah-look at this wreck:
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On the bright side, there are cupcakes.
On the top side, there's this:
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I think it says "M and H."
Why did the baker use "and" instead of an ampersand?
The world... may never know.
Ever wonder what a cake would like like wrapped in wet tissue paper?
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WONDER NO MORE.
This next one is Smurf-tastic:
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In fact, I believe the bride's exact words were, "So help me, I'm gonna smurfin' SMURF that smurfing baker!"
So...
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...that happened.
The bride asked for steampunk:
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She got steamed poop.
Every time I see a wedding cake like this, I think the same thing:
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If only that camouflage worked.
At least it didn't have a weedy deer skull on it, though!
AHAHAHAHAHAWAIT:
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The swan pillars are a nice touch.
The intestine topping, not so much.
Thanks to an anonymous bride, an anonymous wedding guest, Katie F., Judy M., another Anony M., Shari A., & Ashley P. for helping me give brides-to-be everywhere nightmares. SLEEP TIGHT, LADIES.
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Reader Comments (18)
Eye of the beholder time: I thought the first one had MmmdH written on it.
Why is there a "Railroad Train" aimed at the cake… or maybe that's a good thing.
Swans???… oh, yeh. I thought they were the leg bones of the dead deer.
Swans and deer skulls? Oh, deer! And I SWEAR it looks as if there's a circle of plastic canvas under the topper on that M and H cake.
What do these decorators think about? If "think" is the appropriate verb.
Oh, that camouflage number is so perfectly hideous! Thanks for another great gallery o' wrecks.
The first one also has a plastic canvas heart (?) on the top of it, presumably to keep the figurine from toppling or sinking into the icing. They really are reaching for plastic flotsam. And you can see that they had some difficulty cutting that first piece of cake because they had to cut UNDER that stupid heart!
Every one of those conjures the moment in Who Framed Roger Rabbit when Baby Herman tells “Sister Mary Frances, what the h—- happened in here?!?”
"Intestine topping" made me snort. Wow...
Is that camo or is it mold? You don't actually know for sure, do you?
The first one looks like it must have been for a beach wedding. And the bully, who instead of kicking sand in the face of the groom, kicked it on the cake.
And the cake that's supposedly camouflage, are you sure that isn't mold? Maybe this cake had been stored in a damp, dark place for weeks.
Are those PEA PODS on that last one?
Y'all are seeing things. Camo is what we do in the south. It's a Southern thing...you wouldn't understand. Wanna guess what the dress code was for the event? ....yup!
That smurf cake...how and why?!?!?!?! :O :O
Did Sandra Lee make that last cake? Those swan pillars look like they're swimming in corn nuts.
My response to awful camouflage wedding cakes is always the same, “You asked for a camoflauge wedding cake. This is on you.” The best camo wedding cake ever made is still awful. Unless it has stuffed squirrels and empty Bud Light cans, then it’s the best wreck ever.
Why does the camo make me tthink of bruises? Then I noticed the cake topper (I've seen this topper with the bride dragging the groom) and realized maybe that was appropriate... Creeepy...
What IS that dirt on the Mandtt cake? Mandtt is their last name I thought. Why is it so crooked I thought.
The steampunk cake - well, there are gear looking stands - that's steampunk, right? I think the wreckerator got tired while decorating the layers. Started off with the smallest one. Okay, it's ugly, but, not badly done. Medium tier - the day is getting long and well, good enough. Large tier, just let me get this @@#$% thing done!
Seriously, though. What is that dirt?
Please tell me this ended with the brides chasing the cake wreckerators out the door with the scary cakes being thrown at em. Cause I would have done that had it happened to me lol
Can we talk about the deer skull/swan/ intestines cake for another minute? Why are there red plastic army men part of the display? Also, what is on top of the cupcakes? Not one thing is cohesive with another! Oh boy!
M and H - I love how the figurines have stepped off the plastic grid - they're making a run for it!
Camo cake - looks like something Miss Havisham has been saving for about forty years.