It's Time To Let Frozen Go, Bakers
January 19, 2015 The snow glows white on the mountain, just right
Not a wreck here to be seen
;)
A cake kit of inspiration
And it looks like... just a dream!
But bakers howling how the time's not on their side
Couldn't stop their "fix", heaven knows I tried!
;)
This is a sin, you kidding me?
Did you just nick the toy and all the trees?
;)
For real, don't steal, that really bloooows
But now we knoooow
THIS CAKE SUCKS
;)
THIS CAKE SUCKS
;)
Can't hold it back anymore!
THIS CAKE SUCKS
;)
THIS CAKE SUCKS
;)
Believe me, I have more!
;)
I know there
Are worse wrecks, ok?
Let this nerd rage onnnnnnn!
Cuz here's the best "Frozen cake" today:
;)
Thanks to Shauna O., Nikki H., Elizabeth O., Melissa U., Cathleen M., Lisa H., Tiffany L., & Jessica N., who really dodged a bullet there.
*****
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Reader Comments (47)
That last one XD
I had to go back to look at the cakes as I was totally wrapped up in the song. In fact I'll probably spend the rest of the day trying to get this out of my head.
A few weeks ago, I went to see Idina Menzel in "If/Then" on Broadway. Scattered throughout the audience were excited young girls whose parents were, uh, devoted enough to pay up to $190 a ticket to see Elsa in a play that was written for a slightly more mature audience. Imagine the thrill when “Elsa” sang the rousing show stopper “What the Fudge.” Only it wasn’t fudge, it was the THE word, the big one, the queen-mother of dirty words, the "F-dash-dash-dash" word! It was a great song…sort of an adult version of “Let it Go.” When "Elsa" held that note on the word "fudge," it just gave me goosebumps.
Now I have THAT song stuck in my head…
So the one "demo" cake (the perfect one) is for the sole purpose of taunting all of the chain store bakery wreckorators. The "KIT" is 4 or 5 pieces of plastic crap-tastic flotsam/choking hazards, and that's it! The rest is pure assumption. They've lost before they've even begun. Well, at least the kiddos have cake. They really should have cake-top Zambonis. =^0.o^=
I feel sorry for those poor little kids who dreamed of getting a Frozen cake for their birthdays and instead received one of those vile wrecks. Birthday dreams dashed.
That last cake....how generic could you get????
I'll take the last one to go. With one fork please.
I may never forgive you for getting that song stuck in my head again.
Maybe the last one is an ice cream cake? :D
This summer we were picking up a cake from our town, driving it four hours into the Sierras, and then eating it for a birthday two days later. We asked the bakery to freeze this fruit and cream cake for us, then planned to pop it into the freezer on arrival. This cake didn't have a "Frozen" movie theme, but in what must be a VERY common bakery conversation now, at pickup we were asked "Um, the "Frozen" cake or that frozen cake?" "No, I mean, the FROZEN one or the FROZEN one? Did it have a princess or a snowman on it, or was it PLAIN FROZEN? The name on it is Heather? We've got two cakes for Heather. One of them is FROZEN. And Heather is a kid's name." "It has no cartoons on it, it is not blue or purple or white, and Heather is turning 40." "Oh, GOT IT. The frozen one." "Yep."
The way the original design has fallen apart in the copies is familiar to anyone who has studied the coinage of ancient Roman colonies, where local mints tried to copy well made Greek and Roman coins, and failed miserably. Then the copies were copied again and again, getting worse each time. There is no Coin Wrecks site, though there ought to be. But you can get an idea of what happened by looking at some of the illustrations in this paper:
http://goo.gl/i3t3S1
My granddaughter is six, and she loves Sunday Sweets. So, we're just hanging out today and I said "you have to check out cake wrecks today." Usually, even in terrible cake wrecks, she will find something positive to say. Like..."well, it probably still tastes good." Not today. I showed her the Frozen wreckage, and she said "that looks nothing like Arendelle." 😁
Here's the thing with cake kits; often times they just send you the kit, and not any sort of instructions. You just get a picture that goes in the cake book, with no explanation offered on how to make your cake look like the picture. This cake kit is no exception. When you do get instructions, they don't tell you which tips to use, or even give you a picture demo on how to do a certain technique. With this particular cake, you can see that the water is made with clear gel over the colored icing. I don't know about other stores, but we have no way of ordering the clear gel, and we are forbidden from using any product off the shelves as it would not be on the ingredients list on the label. The only things that come with that kit are the two sisters, and the snow flakes. That weird snow capped mountain thing, is NOT included in the kit. Somehow (with witchcraft and a sacrifice of a baby animal) they made that monstrosity with icing, and offer us absolutely NO explanation as to how to recreate it on the cake. Thankfully the photosheet company that makes the fondant toppers for cakes (like Star Wars and Disney Princesses) now make corresponding backgrounds for cake kits that are WAAAAAAY nicer than anything we could ever create with icing, which includes one for this Frozen kit. So if the store has one of those machines, no child ever has to suffer a cake like those again. And I know that Jenn hates cupcake cakes (*patooie*) but I do soooo many of them because they are perfect for school birthdays.
At least there's no pretension with that last one ...
I had this cake in my book and it was a pain in the butt to do. I no longer carry it. With my 40 years experience in decorating cakes--ice cream cakes for the most part--I did an adequate job, much better than your samples, but I would imagine that your typical mass cake producer with inexperienced decorators would look just like the cakes you show. These kits used to be so simple that anyone with basic skills could decorate--that's the selling point. It's getting so that this is no longer the case. Just my opinion....
Ok these are really bad, but the kit does not come with the mountain. I don't know how a regular grocery store decorator is supposed to create that. I just totally leave it off and don't try.
SuBee, thank you, thank you, thank you! I needed a belly laugh today.
Omg this is so sad, but hilarious. Lol. I now work at a grocery store, boo, in the bakery. I make this cake at least 8 times a week. And it has never looked like that. xD
I work at a chain grocery as a decorator and am basically self-taught. What was said about the kit cakes is true. You RARELY get any detailed instructions on these designs and we have been visited by people from our home office telling us to not change anything from the original picture because of copy rights. I also know one massive grocery chain's version of this kit is slightly different from the first picture here. Its really annoying. I would love it if we got instructions on how to make the mountain thing. It looks like it is 3-D in the photos.
To be fair, the original cake design is pretty terrible to begin with.
I work in a supermarket bakery so I make this exact cake quite frequently. The company we get the kits from does send us the decorator card with instructions. The mountain in the picture is made with the speed icer tip. I pipe the mountains straight up and then pipe a support sideways along the back of the mountain. Then smooth with a spatula. It's a PIA but it works. One of my co workers pipes the mountains flat on the cake. One woman complained. :O
I ordered a Frozen cake. It looked perfect. When i went to pick it up, the lady said, " you ordered the Frozen cake right?" I got upset and told her that I had to have it at my daughters daycare within 10 kinutes and I wanted one that was ready to eat. It was. I was red faced.
Wow I've made this cake a million times! How hard is 5 globs of icing? The most annoying part of this cake is the shimmer glaze which is just sticky and tastes awful.
I have discovered, after my daughters' latest birthday (last week), that I HATE ice-cream cakes. Nice idea, but you about need a chainsaw to hack through them, & they DON'T accept candles well. I broke a few trying to jam them in. And then the cake is all hard & somewhat stale-tasting. Why not just have cake with ice cream on the side? Easier & less messy.
As a cake decorator, I hate this deco pac. The toy the kid gets out of it sucks and it is close to impossible to make it look like the picture. With most other deco pacs its pretty straight forward and easy. This one, not so much. Also, why the hell are the mountains pink? I have never seen a pink mountain.
The last cake is the real world equivalent of a broken jpeg icon.
For extra points, bring that to a party and act like people are crazy for not seeing that it's a fully decorated cake. Works better if you have a couple accomplices in attendance. >:)
Actually I have commented in the past about another post about this cake about a year ago here in Cake Wrecks. This design is actually a change from the original, but the only difference being that they added piping gel to the water and the bottom border in now purple not red (I have never figured that out, why red??). I decorate for Walmart and feel I'm a competent enough decorator. I hate this design with a burning passion. For such a popular and colorful movie this design is an insult. I have to do it at least 10 times a month, because even though parents aren't impressed with the design it's all we have. You are not allowed to make edible images of the characters, it actually is against copyright laws. Heck, by those same laws we are not even allowed to make any changes to the design, not even change the color of a border. It's ridiculous. Anyways, back to the point at hand, these decorators are just not using any common sense or creativity to make these cakes at least look like the design they are based of of.
Jen, tell us how you REALLY feel about these cakes.
Me... loved the movie, hate the cakes.
I am so glad my kids are older, it's no wonder these wreckorators have failed. I have found it best if my kids want a certain theme to just buy the deco pac and do them myself. One year my son wanted sponge bob and all I had in the pac was a face, pants, and arms. Talk about easy, giant yellow cake with body parts sticking out of it. A few years ago I had to step up to the plate though. I bought a really cool pac online for a football stadium and the instructions were a very dark photo copy! I was so mad, it cost $40 and I hadn't even bought anything else, talk about an expensive and frustrating cake. But in the end it was awesome, the boys loved it and now I can use it for my grand kids or a Super Bowl party.
honestly, I just got another request for Frozen cupcakes.12 orders so far. i'm so done with this theme...
Wow that last cake.. Really wreckerators? You can't even pop a toy on it lol sheesh. Just wow.
@SuBee, thanks. This is why I can never quite let this blog go. Every now and then there's one great comment like yours.
Jess a lot of people are in blatant violation of copyright laws then.
I'm sending the link to this page to my son, who is a K-12 music teacher in a very small school district. He doesn't much like the "Frozen" music, mostly because it's all his elementary and junior high girls want to sing. He actually broke down this year for the holiday concert and let the junior high choir (all girls) sing "Let it Go." So yeah, cake decorators aren't the only ones who suffer from the movie's popularity!
I may be the only person on the planet with young daughters who hasn't seen this movie, so I am very happy to be able to say I am immune to getting whatever that song is stuck in my head. :-) I will probably let them see it in about 3 years, once I stop seeing little girls in tacky plastic blue dresses everywhere.
The really irritating bit is, my daughter's nickname is Elsa, which was extremely rare when she was born (2011), but is now probably going to be name of the year for 2015. I shudder to think how many times we're going to have the "Oh, you named her after the movie Frozen? HELL NO WE DIDN'T" conversation before this fad finally dies.
I fully support all bakeries in their quest to make animated-movie-mania die as quickly as possible. It's a movie, kids! Watch it, enjoy it, then life moves on. No, you don't need that backpack. Or that pencil case. Or that hat. No, you can't buy what-is-that-THING?
I am officially stealing "let this nerd rage ooonnnn!"
Just thought you should know. Gotta find a way to work that into my daily vocabulary. Sadly, it shouldn't be too hard for me.
Oh please oh please record a movie like "What's this" for "Let it Go!!"
I got that same cake in October for my daughter's birthday. I went to a few stores and found the better one. None of them looked like the first one with mountains, but then who wants a mound of greasy, too sweet frosting? I wanted to be a cake decorator, went to culinary school, i learned that i don't like people or following directions😀. After reading theses comments, i made a wise career choice.
My kid's friend had this cake just last weekend. It wasn't horrible (except blue icing + small children = bleargh) but there are only 3 snowflake rings, and even though she asked, the mother couldn't get extra rings. 12 tiny girls + only 3 plastic snowflake rings = tears of despair and injustice.
Please tell me the last one was an ice cream cake because that would be epic...
Love this one, love it! The only thing that could be funnier than disappointed all those brides are all those disappointed children! XD (They have to grow up sooner or later, you know... )
Lol. Check out the date on this video. http://youtu.be/U-lr9Ra3gEA
You're changing the world, Jen!
I take slight offense to the comment about large- chain store decorators being doomed. I am a decorator for one of those large- chains and my Frozen cakes look pretty darn close to the model. So let's just say MOST large- chain decorators are doomed.
I got this cake for my daughters birthday. It was also dissapointing.
Hello there!
The bakery I work at always makes it look like #1. :)
Look up if there is an Ingles near you before getting this cake!
Generally when I was a kid, I remember the cakes being more creative then this. I wanted a ballerina cake, it was beautiful... I wish I had pictures. Yes it had plastic ballerina's on it, but those ballerina's I hand picked, the prettiest, most perfect out of the box, the decorators even made sure to leave it exactly as *I* asked. Then again I lived in a small town, so it was rare a cake screw up happened.
The other really cool one I had was a Bakugan Battle Brawlers Cake when I was 12. Pretty simple, just a white cake with an oversized Dragonoid. I asked for them to go crazy with fire attributes since with the game, that was what I ran the most.
It was awesome.
Last couple of years I just picked out a cake and asked for them to just write Happy Birthday on it, while we shopped for my birthday dinner ingredients. Picked it up and it was always good. But geeze... How hard is it to fuck up placing a figure, some rings on a cake?
Oh God. I work as a decorator and we ordered some of those kits. I cannot even begin to describe how much I hated them. All that piping gel, all the time it took. I work at a dq so I had to put the cake in the freezer multiple times because it would start melting. None of mine ever looked bad (never got any complaints) but I was never completely happy with how they turned out. After we used the box of 6 kits, I never ordered more, despite how popular Frozen is. I honestly don't blame decorators for taking some shortcuts on this kit. Lol
The 6th cake down was my daughters first birthday cake. I was appalled by it. Lol looking back on it I can laugh but on her actual birthday party day this brought me to tears.