Not That Commercial Again!!
August 25, 2014 Every year, millions of cakes are wrecked.
;)
*gulp*
But YOU can help!
♫ In the hands of a Wrecker
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♫ Cakes all live in fear
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♫ From the dark chocolate tear drops...
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♫ To the endless messes we fear
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If you buy just one wreck a month...
...that's just pennies a day...
♫ You are pulled toward the wreckage
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♫ In its silent...
;)
misery...
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YOU could help these cakes feel wanted.
♫ If you buy wrecks from bakeries...
;)
♫ They might fi- i- i- ind...
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♫ Some comfort, dear.
(At least until you eat them.)
;)
Let's give generous thanks to Lola L., Jodee R., Marla M., Anna F., Suzanne F., Andrea H., Stuart S., Sarah M., Karen P., and Geneva W. Now stop reading and go out and buy a wreck -- and maybe some ice cream.
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Reader Comments (29)
"Hi, I'm Sarah McLachlan and I am here to ruin your entire day."
Is the chocolate cake with the crying face suppose to be a funeral/condolence cake? I'm trying to figure out just what kind of "celebration" that cake would be used for.
Oh my God, I am going to have that song stuck in my head for the rest of the day. I'd be laughing at the wrecks if I wasn't screaming on the inside from the terrible that is Sarah McLachlan.
lol@dotti :D thanks cakewrecks for giving me needed giggles :D
And friends, we are now in the exceptionally hot month of August, and you know what that means. Every year hundreds of cakes are left locked in a car, with the windows fully closed, while their owners run into a store for “just for a second.” Sure, it’s cumbersome to have to take your cake with you when you leave the car, but the stakes are too high. And even with the windows cracked, the danger remains. Studies have shown that there is no safe amount of time to leave a cake unattended in a hot car. Just a few minutes can be extremely dangers – even fatal – for your sweet dessert. Dangers range from gooey icing, lopsidedness, sprinkle deterioration, runny letters and unclear words, fallen plastic figures, to, of course, the coup de grâce, total liquefaction and vaporization.
Research reveals that no cake is safe. Texture doesn’t matter. From the delicate Whipped Cream frosting to the creamy, smooth Buttercream to the stiff Royal Icing – all are vulnerable. I think this actual quote from the internet tells the story: “On a day that is just 72 degrees Fahrenheit, the temperature [inside a car] can increase by 30 to 40 degrees in an hour, and 70% of this increase occurs the first 30 minutes,” he says. I was unable to find other quotes for higher temperatures, but I think it’s probably worse, and you should to. And, unlike people, with cakes “their abilities to cool through sweating are not as developed as adults,” that same he said.
So, don’t be one of those people who return to their car only to find a greasy stain on a piece of cardboard, a few sprinkles on the floor and Barbie’s upper body under the seat. Take your cake with you whenever you leave your vehicle.
Please, Don’t Let Your Cake Re-Bake!
Aaaaaaahhh!!!!
The runny-nosed, red-mouthed, goggle-eyed goat of doom really got me at the end. I'll be over here cowering in the corner...
What, we don't get a Wrescued Wrecks calendar, magazine subscription and a t-shirt to let everyone know we've joined the noble fight?
(And yes, I misspelled "rescued" on purpose... ;)
Please. Let's not encourage them.
Oh, man, I HATE those commercials. However, next time I'll see these wrecks, and I'll get some ice cream, and that will make it all better.
It's a bit like saying 'Please give house room to an orphan skunk.'
I'm just trying to figure out why the yellow frown face guy has a tongue sticking out of his forehead. *squinting and placing ear on shoulder* Did be grow up next to a nuclear testing site?
I feel like I just saw my kid in the paper (not the "Most Wanted" section, maybe just the "Police Notes")
Hi Eh-Lmo!! My cakey is so growed up!
I don't even mind getting the song stuck in my head (maybe...)
I LOVE the Goat of Doom! Can't imagine what occasion it was created for, however.
Blechhh--- those mounds of gloopy frosting are making me sick just looking at them!! 0_o
I so wish I was that Jodee R. But, alas, I am not.
Today is bittersweet. I registered my baby for high school :'( But on a good note, only 8 more wake-ups until I put her on that bus!!!
The goat of doom almost killed me! And I may never recover from the coughing fit @mel caused. Thank you for that PSA, sir!
Sung to "I Will Remember You"
I have a wreck for you.
Will you purchase it please?
Don't tell yourself not to buy
Gooey mounds of gross frosting.
I was laughing...until I scrolled down to the last cake...then I screamed...what the &%$* IS THAT THING??? Yeah, "Goat-Head of Doom" pretty much sums it up! I think I'll pass on the cake and just go straight for the ice cream...ice cream has the amazing power of making EVERYTHING better, at least if it's not better once you're eating the ice cream then at least you FEEL better about how crappy it is...and maybe you can even laugh and smile a bit and as we all know...PERSPECTIVE can make a huge difference.
So, yeah, I'll just be over here hiding from the creepy Goat-Head of Doom and eating my ice cream until I can laugh at said Goat-Head of Doom...or pass out from the repeated ice cream headaches...
Ice cream is a super food...or a food with super powers...we should start a petition!
@Jodee: sorry for the coughing fit...just trying to do my part for those poor cakes who have no one to speak for them....
Those are some pretty wrecked cakes.
Awww and there was just one lonely sad face on a golden pan. I'm sure he was wondering "why did they stick this strawberry on my forehead?"
From the Island of Unloved Cakes
I didn't think the "creepy goat head of doom" was creepy at all--I thought it was just a tribute to the excellent movie "Dragnet" (the goat-head logo of PAGAN - People Against Goodness And Normalcy")
@mel: "Please, Don’t Let Your Cake Re-Bake!"
OMG, that is so WONDERFUL!!! Wanna help me think of a tagline for my business?
Wow. I would try and not giggle at that sad lonely happy face tart. I might just buy it out of pity which is where the danged wreckerators succeeded with me lol. Evil, evil wreckerators.
I am that Jodee R. who sent in the second cake. Funny, my sister follows Cakewrecks on Facebook too and instantly recognized my mom's fingers in that photo, and came over for verification that I had sent in the picture. I had to also, because I send in so many cakes, I forget which ones are mine! =P
Is the fifth photo down frosted bunt cakes? Why would anyone do that?
To be honest, I kinda like the mismatched frightened tier cake.
@TLC: thanks, and sure....and, by the way, the alternative tag line was "When the day's a hottie, remember it's not biscotti. Please, Don't Let Your Cake Re-Bake!" However, that seemed a little long and I wasn't sure how many people would catch he biscotti joke as I don't know if people generally know it's double-baked....
Ummm...is that a strawberry on that "smiley face" one?
A Goat Head of Doom to make this one quiver like the little cartoon it is: http://cakewrecks.squarespace.com/home/2009/4/3/fear-factor-cw-style.html