Friday Favs, 6/27/14
June 27, 2014 Some of my favorite new submissions this week:
When CW reader Jamie ordered a birthday cake for her husband Jim Bob, she encountered one of the funniest dilemmas I've seen yet - and that is really saying something.
The problem?
Her baker had never heard of the letter J:
;)
And apparently thinks Birt and Hday are two separate words.
(Give it a minute.)
(Theeeere it is.)
Um....
;)
Any guesses?
Anyone? Anyone?
Bueller?
Two of the most misspelled words I see on cakes are "congratulations" and "confirmation." So when someone is foolish enough to order a "Congratulations on your confirmation" cake, HILARITY WILL ENSUE:
;)
Thank goodness the baker made up for it with all those great decorations.
Wrecky minion Tabatha was having a bad day, so she decided to swing by the discount rack at the bakery for a little pick-me-up. Then she asked the baker to write "Eye of the Tiger" on it, since we all know that's the best song for a bad day training montage. (I'm picturing slo-mo clips of rampant toe-stubbing, pink slip shredding, and bad haircut reaction shots.)
Anyway, as it turned out, Tabatha got an even bigger pick-me-up than she bargained for:
;)
Greetings, from We of the Turkeys!
And finally, when it comes to baseball bats, this baker is ALL THUMB:
;)
NAILED IT.
Thanks to Jamie, Ashley R., Sandi M., Tabitha G., & Amanda F. for knowing something was wrong with that last wreck, but not quite putting her finger on it.
*****
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Reader Comments (58)
Bonus on the I Of The Tiger cake-nobody puts baby in a corner!
I think the second cake is supposed to be the Giving Tree. Only you probably need to get vaccinated for whatever it's giving.
By Jove, I think you've discovered the giant Purple Chalice of Despair, hidden for generations. It is reputed to cause the deepest darkest depression in anyone that sups from it - even glancing at it made me pretty sad. As did the thought that anyone found it acceptable to cross out the word 'baby' with a couple of fat blue squirts of icing, as if that makes it invisible.
Sung to "Purple People Eater"
Well, she saw this thing comin' out of the box
She took one good look and it put her in shock
She commenced to shakin' and she said, "Oh, G."
"Looks like you never learned a letter to me!"
I see a one-pawed, long-armed, purple-suckered people slapper
(One-pawed, long-armed, purple-suckered people slapper)
A one-pawed, long-armed, purple-suckered people slapper
Sure looks strange to me.
Well, the man confirred, and it's plain to see
He's anti-gradulation, pro hilarity
She's one of the tigers, baby that's so dumb
It only happens when your baker's all thumbs
it's still a one-pawed, long-armed, purple-suckered people slapper
(One-pawed, long-armed, purple-suckered people slapper)
A one-pawed, long-armed, purple-suckered people slapper
Sure looks strange to me.
I like the one baker's stylistic choice of writing "Congradulation Confirman" in all capital letters except for the i's, which, although printed in lowercase, were bigger than the capital letters.
Hmmm...could it be that the 2nd cake is supposed to be a tennis racket?
The only other thing that springs to mind are the old "funeral fans" they used to give mourners before air conditioning was common. My mother still has (and uses) a few of those that she got back in the 60's.
The second one looks like a mushroom cloud.
The "tiger" cake is mysterious on so many levels. Did Tabatha have a bad day because she thought she might be expecting and wasn't? That would explain the stork's obvious dismay at seeing the crossed-out "baby." (No deliveries here, move along!) Is the "tigen" (that's how I read it) perhaps planning to eat the baby? And maybe the stork, too? Those wings look like they're ready for takeoff. And lastly, are those two little, er, piles possibly tigen poop? Is I of the Tigen a new, villainous superhero? Inquiring minds want to know.
@Sharyn -- You have outdone yourself today. Bravo! I will have that song with its new words in my head all day.
I think I saw the purple thing in a Dr. Seuss book once upon a time.
I'm guessing #2 is the backside of a peacock. Well, not literally. Because it looks nothing like the backside of a peacock. But that's what I think they were going for. Or maybe a turkey . . . (head-tilt) . . . Let's just call it a day and say it's a fan.
#2--a blueberry bush?
My daughter is getting confirmed this fall, I think I'm going to make the cake myself to spare making some poor baker have to spell those words. Besides, she will be a ConfirWOMAN, not a ConfirMAN.
In all fairness, those going through the confirmation process are confirmands. Maybe the wreckerator merely left off a letter? And 'congratulations' is so uniformly botched by wreckerators that I fear there is a list of "acceptable" variations presented during "training".
CONFIRMAN! The newest superhero who has amazing superpowers that enable him to Confirm anything! His archnemesis is DENIALMAN.
From the note that Tabatha got the cake from the discount rack, I'm assuming it was originally supposed to be a baby shower cake that no one bought. Although one wonders why they didn't keep the stork plastic flotsam for their next wreck!
@Dre - I totally almost snorted chai all over my keyboard at "Nobody puts baby in the corner." GREAT catch!
I also second the second one as a mushroom cloud... as painted by Bob Ross. "Happy little nuclear swirls!" *snort!*
Ya know, the longer I am a reader of this blog, the more convinced I am that, like tattoos, one should just nix the words on cakes! Thus avoiding a large opportunity for wreckiness... Of course, I don't necessarily trust the bakers to use appropriate symbolism to make up for the lack of words either. So baby carrot jockeys, sperm balloons, and poo swirls it is! :D
Ummm. Maybe it's a bouquet? Or a radioactive balloon?
Also, clever misspelling of "Bueller" there. ;)
[Editor's note- Ugh. I even double checked because I thought it looked wrong. Thanks for the heads up. -john (thoJ)]
My choices for interpretations of cake #2 is either mushroom cloud or psychedelic tree.
*Small respectful voice* Isn't it "Bueller" rather than "Buellor?"
And finally, @Dre wins the internets for me today!
Sharyn that is perfect :D as for these mistakes, it proves my theory that we are de-evolving as a species O_o
I wonder if the baker of the first cake is an old Italian dude/dudette. The letter J is barely used in Italian if at all and I know my husband's Italian grandparents often write his name as Gimi (for Jimmy). I'm going to guess that the second cake was a failed attempt at a baby rattle.
That second cake is very clearly a Dr. Seuss style tree. Think, Horton Hears a Who...
Confirman, Confirman,
Doing the things a Confir can...
Since cake no. 2 is purple, I'm going to guess it's supposed to be a bunch of grapes. I hope no one puts those grapes in MY wine.
And a baker that doesn't know the letter J. Let's put that baker in charge of making all the cakes for Duggars!
Perhaps the decorator of #1 was French, and Jamie, er, Gamie, spelled "Jim Bob" over the phone? Because in French, the letter "J" is pronounced "zhee" and the letter "G" is pronounced "zhay". Yeah, that'll be it.
@Dre- Oh my goodness! I truly laughed out loud!
Perhaps the cake in #2 should be turned around.
I'm seeing an ad for Viagra...? It is blue, after all...
Is that "baseball bat" a moldy hot dog bun???
I put the I in TIGER!!
@LadybugFaerie - Okay, you had me at "Happy little nuclear swirls". In all honesty, I kind of like the color.
That's not a thumb...that's a delicious loaf of Jimmy John's bread. ;9
The baker most likely didn't misspell "Confirmation" because "Congratulations Confirmation" is grammatically wrong. I am betting the phrase was supposed to be "Congratulations Confirmand" which is the singular form of the person being confirmed.
As a previous cake decorator, I still say in my head con GRAT ulations each time I write out the word because most people don't even say the word phonetically and thus are prone to misspelling it.
Regardless, they could have spared a few roses in the shape of a cross or *something* to jazz up that cake.
These are hilarious, but for the record, Confirman was likely supposed to be Confirmand. A confirmand is a person going through confirmation. It's still all wrong, though.
The No.2 cake is Van Gogh's Starry Night! Can't you see it?
So it is a masterpiece after all!
I'd bet that Jamie (aka Gamie) suspected something would be amiss from the spelling on the box. Reminds me of a visit to an auto tire store where the Hispanic gentleman in front of me was named Jaime (pronounced Haime). Try explaining that to a Deep South mechanic.
Anyway, ccc #2 is definitely a Royal Paulownia tree. Or possibly part of a chenille bedspread.
Coming from South Carolina, I'm guessing the tennis-racket-blueberry-bush-mourning-fan-chalice thing is a new, creative interpretation of the palmetto tree on our state flag. Assuming, of course, that the decorator is from or operates in South Carolina and that the purple is supposed to be navy.
That's a lot to assume.
I am stunned, simply stunned, that nobody recognises what that last cake is depicting! It's Cricket! That is most clearly a cricket bat. I imagine the baker is a recent emigree from somewhere British and just doesn't understand what all this fuss about a dressed-up game of rounders is all about. Clearly these odd American types simply haven't been properly educated, thus his subtlety in showing them the "proper" way to play with a bat and ball.
My guess for #2 (appropriately placed, may I just say) is that it's a key...? For a door that many a wreckorator dare not go....ever.
I think the second cake is a horribly poor attempt at a wine glass.
The Baseball Bat looks like a moldy sub sandwich!!
I have no guess as to what the purple thing is but it's purple so really, it doesn't matter. Because, purple! (I TOLD you guys I used to live in a purple house! )
@Dre ~ Simply awesome!
@Sharyn ~ Now I want to find that old cheesy movie and watch it again!
@Julie ~ "CONFIRMAN! The newest superhero who has amazing superpowers that enable him to Confirm anything! His archnemesis is DENIALMAN." I love it!
Wow...I tried to read the post, and I got a 30 second pop up spam ad *word from our sponser* crap.
[Editor's note- I'm so sorry about that, Kelly. I just screamed at those responsible and it should never happen again. Thanks for the heads up. -john]
I think cake 2 is a hand mirror.
Why, why why, do people insist on putting a tittle over an upper case I - or using a lower case i in the middle of an otherwise all caps word? Yeesh! This is where a one-pawed, long-armed, purple-suckered people slapper would really come in handy. A good whomp upside the head would set 'em all straight.
I think Cake Number 2 is some sort of misguided attempt at a banjo.
Jood Gob!!
I would personally like to thank these wreckerators for setting the bar
Extraordinarily LOW, and making me look FREAKING AWESOME!!!!!!
Thank you!!!!! LOL 😋
At first glance I thought the last one was a meal for a picnic or something -- a giant sub to share and some cookies for dessert. If that were the case, it still wouldn't be a winner, but it wouldn't be a wreck either.
If you are sure, however, that the thing in the center is cake and not a sandwich, then it is pathetic.
And I hope Gim Bob had a very, very happy birthday.
My guess for cake #2 is that it is a mattenklopper, which is Dutch for "carpet beater." Why one would make a purple carpet beater out of cake is beyond me, but hey! let's all celebrate! Oh, and the plural for "confirmand" is "confirmandi" -- so maybe TWO letters are missing at the end of that word...! And I think "GimBob" is the secret identity of the new superhero, "Confirman!" -- and vice versa. 'Can't wait to read the comic books!
I think that #2 may be a magic mirror. That's the first thing that came to my mind.
i think that second one is supposed to be bouquet of flowers.
Maybe that cake is a giant grape stalk. Lol I even recognize the bakery it came from. If they think that thing is grapes they need to get out more. I would hate to think if that wreckerator can't do J what they would do to my name lol.
#2 is a lollipop tree. But only if you like grape.
Amaya, the bat in that last post could be a cricket bat without a handle, but then the balls would be all wrong. Cricket balls are red. When I look at it I see a bunch of ants carrying away a crust someone threw away because it was mouldy (see the bluish bit)? Yum, yum!
OMG Sharyn, that was perfection. Here I was all unsuspectingly appreciating the subtle humor of "Oh, G" when along comes a "one-pawed, long-armed, purple-suckered people slapper". Got me laughing to tears. Then I went back and read it again and laughed even more. Very glad I waited until today to read this. Thank you!