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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Friday
Apr252014

Princess Show & Sell

The princesses are back for National Princess Week, eager to show you their new castle!

[Original penis castle cake removed at baker's request. Please enjoy this other penis castle cake.]

You know what they say: "One princess' doorbell is another man's ding-dong."

 

Hey! Snow White! HANDS OFF!

Thank you.

 

They also want to show off their finger painting:

 

And their... crown?

Let's go with crown.

 

And whatever this thing is:

(I'm guessing "royal spider smasher.")

 

Hey, ever seen a reeeeally long hairball?

Ew.
Thanks, Rapunzel.

 

Some of them even got new dresses!

I guess that's one way to be the ball of the Belle.

 

Of course, not all princesses are DISNEY princesses.

In fact, may I be frank?

Awesome.

 

So just remember, ladies: you're never too old...

...to be a priscess.

 

Thanks to Anony M., Wendy, Kimberly C., Stephanie H., Vanessa C., Carissa B., Marjorie R., Stephanie H., & Heather for that priceless priscess.

*****

Thank you for using our Amazon links to shop! USA, UK, Canada.

« Sunday Sweets: A Disney Movie Marathon, Part 2 | Main | Beauty Is Only Skin Deep »

Reader Comments (103)

Perfect finally for the Princess' out there. They all can have a "Happy Ending".

April 25, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterDRCGGK

Sing along now.... "Follow the Yellow Sick Road. Follow the Yellow Sick Road."

April 25, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterMillie P

Its the Pretty, Pretty Princess Pink Penis Palace!

April 25, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterZea#

i am DYING. simply DYING with pain seeing that first pink dink castle! EEKS! so hilarious. as always, providing me with such good laughs! xo

The fifth picture is obviously a pink bejewelled electric guitar (stringless).....<tilts head> ....or maybe a mirror.

April 25, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterDawn B

I thought the royal spider smasher was a guitar! LOL! I hope no one actually PAID for these.

April 25, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterKathy C.

So I see this wreck on bbm and run to send it in to the site.... refresh browser check if any new wrecks were put up while I was away today ..... first cake..... the pic I just emailed..... note to self check for update before embarrassing yourself.

April 26, 2014 | Unregistered Commentermoon

Happy 70 th Birthday
PRINCESS

April 26, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterJohn p.

We had a pink princess party for my mother's 80th.

April 26, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterKara H.

Howdya-Doo-ah! Yes, Trudy, that it is most certainly Frank-n-Furter!

April 26, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterRivergoddess

Lol. I loved the cute pumpkin on the Snow White cake. Though for the life of me I can't figure out why it was there unless the wreckerator confused her with Cinderella and even then still confuses me lol. Wow.

April 26, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterArlene

The first cake gave me flashbacks to a visit to the Bizarre Bazaar in Chicago back in the '80s. (I'm not sure it is still around.)

April 26, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterCaySedai

I think what bothers me the most is that the first cake would have been fine or even nice without the...err...turrets squashed on.

April 26, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterClara

Thanks Jodi for the heads up on the Rapunzel cake - didn't realize that.
Thanks for making me laugh today Cake Wrecks.

April 26, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterMorag

If you turn Royal Spider Smasher counter clockwise for a quarter of a turn you would realize it is reminiscent of the sculpture that Raymond's mom made on Everybody Loves Raymond and would go really well with the first cake. That being said I think Royal Spider Smasher might be my new Euphemism. "Hey there Handsome! Want to smash my Royal Spider?"

April 26, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterHeather

"Some day my prince will come... " "Huh huh huh m heh heh heh m heh heh heh... "

April 26, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterQue Sarah Sarah

The spider smasher is actually a mirror from Snow White... The things that look like spiders are meant to be sparkling diamonds!!! It's a mirror mirror on the wall kind of cake, just not that great lol

April 26, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterShelley

Looks like the evil stepmother mixed up her cauldrons, and dipped the apple in toxic waste by mistake. Resulting in Snow White growing a foot and partial leg from her neck.

April 26, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

This is the first time I"ve seen this site. OMG, I love it!! The comments are even funnier than the cakes. I will visit here often.

April 26, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterLynette

Loved these! My guess is the order-taker for #1 heard "phallus" instead of "palace" -- honest yet twisted mistake! ;)

April 26, 2014 | Unregistered Commenterwhoopskaboom

hi

April 26, 2014 | Unregistered Commenteramy reid

What are 3 cocks doing on the Childs cake? Teaching them how to deep throat???

April 26, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterChris J Robert

The spider smasher. Is the hand mirror from the Beauty and the Beast It shows you whatever you want to see

April 26, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterAndy

Aha! The first cake is the disaster one. The person couldn't make the castle. All I can say is, "it looks like the man's private part times 3."

April 26, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterKaren

Did you see that you were shared by George Takei and credited too! Super sweet!

Did you see that you were shared by George Takei and credited too! Super sweet!

As the good Dr. Frank N Furter would say, "Don't dream it, be it!"

April 26, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterKat

The best part about these bad princess cakes? Your commentary was so funny, that GEORGE TAKEI posted a link on his Facebook page. Eee!

April 26, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterTeDiouS

I think we all know what was on that first cake decorators mind that day, maybe that had a good night beforehand hence where their subconscious was that day of creation lol.

April 26, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterLozza

Check out the look on the frog's face on the Princess Frank cake.

April 26, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterSP

why does the first cake have 3 giant penices on it?

April 26, 2014 | Unregistered Commenterwhat did i just see

Want to know what I love? Two things actually.

1- The "baker" of the original #1 photo SAW THIS BLOG!!! AND recognized their "hard" work.

2- That you had ANOTHER penis castle cake to replace the first photo.

April 26, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterFluffy Cow

I think the spider smasher is supposed to be a hand mirror with sparkly diamonds! "Oooh, what's that on your ring finger?? A spider!"

April 27, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterRNG

Sorry, baker of redacted penis cake #1. George Takei already shared that photo on facebook, which means the whole internet now knows...

April 27, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterJenna

Trying to figure out why you changed out the first cake for one that is maybe less offensive. The other one was a scream. Did you have complaints?

April 27, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterMarie

The new first cake would actually be quite nice if it had pointy turrets instead of condom topped "towers".

April 27, 2014 | Unregistered Commenternormajean

Marie, it says right under the photo, "removed at baker's request". Jen will remove photos if bakers ask nicely.

April 27, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterNatalie

I think the "royal spider smasher" is a mirror with diamonds on the handle ... not spiders. The lines are a shine coming out of the "diamonds" ...

April 27, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterBailey

I have seen the "Original" photo for cake # 1, and now this "replacement" photo.... The replacement photo looks like they all have shiny, partially rolled down, candy condoms in place. Practice safe....uh, "frosting" folks!

April 27, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterDorene

At least replacement cake is protected. From something. Or other.

April 27, 2014 | Unregistered Commenternanalettie

The fact that there were multiple "penis castle" cakes to choose from makes #1 even funnier.

#2 is just terrible as well as anatomically impossible. And what is the name on there? It looks like "Muttighan".

#3...proving that with just a little ingenuity & effort, you can even screw up a cake with premade decorations. I can just imagine the designer of those plastic portraits, laboring away at the design, until s/he finally created a "foolproof" decoration for grocery store bakeries...only to have that mess made with them..."oh well, back to the drawing board".

#8: All hail the clown princess! Wait, does that say "Koydince" for the name? Please tell me that's horribly misspelled.

#9: So they managed to avoid the easy pitfalls of "70st" & "brithdey" only screw up "princess", wow. What a terrible thing to do to some poor 70-year-old lady!

April 27, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterNerfbomb

The obvious dildo castle has been posted to my wall too many times. I'm a decorator and people have tagged me in this pic asking if I could make one lol.

April 28, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterAlecia

I love that you had a second penis castle cake just hanging out waiting for the winner to be unable to perform its duties. Just slap that baby onto the website, no worries at all! And I would bet money that you also have several (hundred) more you could have chosen. You probably even have a folder titled "penis castles" don't you??

That baker is super lame for requesting you take down the picture. Alternately, you may be for caving and taking it down. This is a free country after all, and last I checked, cakes were not copyrighted.

May 1, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterCyberTychoBrahe

Actually, CyberTychoBrahe, not only could the cake itself be considered protected under copyright laws, the photo of the cake would be protected. Copyright laws protect the intellectual property of the ‘author of original work’. Also, the work does not need to be registered with the US Copyright Office to be considered for copyright protection. Although registering the original work would aid in a copyright infringement lawsuit.

People can be very litigious and Cake Wrecks was just being careful…

It *IS* a free country after all, which is what affords you the right to voice your opinion…even if your opinion is “super lame”.

May 1, 2014 | Unregistered Commenterbeemyladybug

Ah, so sad. My son wanted a Wreck-plica of the Princess P. cake for his birthday/graduation/pride party.

June 4, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterTanglelocks

#5 Spiders or 'crabs'? You decide.

December 15, 2014 | Unregistered Commenterrocketride

#1 Schloss or schlange? You decide.
#5 Spiders or 'crabs'? You decide.

December 15, 2014 | Unregistered Commenterrocketride

What is the name on the Snow White cake? Muttighan? Please tell me that's a perfectly normal name in some other country.

January 2, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterRivkahChaya

I laughed so hard at the "Not all princesses are Disney princesses" cake. LOVE IT! And yeah, I'm going with a mirror instead of a "royal spider smasher" lol! I've read about 15 of your cake pages so far at now 2 AM. Keep them coming!

March 3, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterKim

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