Terribly Inappropriate
January 17, 2012 A few of you are aware that today is a kind of milestone for me, since it's the day John and I planned many months ago to end this blog.
I'm happy to report this is not goodbye, however. You'll be stuck with me - bad puns and all - for a while longer at least.
So, to celebrate the fact that absolutely nothing noteworthy is happening here today, allow me to present something really inappropriate:
;)
See? It's seasonally inappropriate!
[head tilt] Er...among other things.
And really, wouldn't "Happy HooHoo" sound better? Or did the baker realize - as I just did - that that sounds like a new feminine hygiene product?
"Happy HooHoo: for all your salsa-dancing/horseback-riding/splashing-through-the-ocean-surf needs. Because you totally do those things. If you're a REAL woman."
Ok, that veered into unexpectedly inappropriate places. Sorry. Let's stick with seasonal impropriety, shall we? You know, like this:
;)
"Hey. I'M UP HERE."
Something something dairy-free! Haha!
Feels good to get that off my chest.
The nuts, I mean.
The CRUSHED nuts, I mean. Jeez. Get your mind out of the gutter already. It's getting crowded in here.
Ok, forget seasonally inappropriate: this is just plain wrong.
;)
HOLY UNFORTUNATE STEM PLACEMENT, BATMAN.
Well, maybe more logs than stems...
[rimshot!]
Thanks to Megan H., Dion H., & Katie B. from the bottom of my peach.
Reader Comments (168)
If you ever went away (and I don't mean just Cake Wrecks, but you and your hubby writing it), I doubt I cd even muster up the will to come in to work in the morning. Please keep me employed! (P.S. Downton Abbey is AWESOME!)
Is is just me, or do santa's legs look suspiciously like the witches leg from another recent post?
Merry hoohoos are NOT bright red with frothy white edges, nope not merry at all. Sad, ouchy hoohoo.
PS glad we haven't driven you away just yet!
That last wreck could be used as a visual in a PSA about not lighting farts... O_O
Oh. My. The last one needs some sort of Stridex pads for the...ahem..."cheek" acne. O.o
Both of your blogs rock, Jen! Thank you for all of the hilarious posts that make me keel over :)
SOOOOO glad you are still with us! You are one of the few places I go each and every day! (Other than the fridge and potty - lol!) (Oh, and bed!)
Thanks for not getting all junkified like Icanhascheez**** has!
Just pace yourself - we don't need to lose this web treasure!!
Just wanted to say how much I enjoy CW! My daily LOL. Do take care of yourself and take some time off if you need to!
I just found you not long ago, pleeeeez don't leave me!!
Okay, it's all good, you're still here. Whew!!! :-D
When I was scrolling down and caught a glimpse of the last picture, I was thinking you were going to "crack" a joke about "sticky buns." LOL!
Thanks for continuing this CakeWreckdom for all of us!!
I'm going to join the line and say that even though I never comment, I am so glad you aren't ending Cake Wrecks. Staying sane is important and I don't mind no more books if it means you can keep doing the website. Thank you and John both so much for this awesome place :)
I may not post everyday, but I read everyday!!! I would be lost without Cake Wrecks!!! So glad you are keeping it going. I totally understand about being overwelmed though. Thanks for making me smile, want to throw up, and of course LAUGH!!!
Wow...those peaches are some of the worst (and, therefore, best) wrecks I have seen on here. You guys really bring a smile to my face each day, and I always look forward to reading Cake Wrecks.
I'm glad you're going to continue the blog for a while, but will certainly understand if you need at some point to move on. I'll continue to be a fan for as long as you're here!
I'm not much of a commenter, and not a blogger at all, but I had to say thank-you for not ending this blog (even though I get wanting to not be in demand any more). CW's one of very few standard online for me that can always cheer me up and that is the BEST procrastination tool (I'm a student/marker and work from home a lot). So, thanks!
AAAAGH! WHAT IS THAT LAST ONE?!!
oh wait, not sure I want to know. Never mind. Merry Late HooHoo everyone!
P.S. that's weird, my brother calls Santa "Ho Ho Ho". I wonder if he ordered it...
Where would we go for daily visual poo jokes if there were no Cake Wrecks?
Not to mention anatomy jokes, dismembered baby jokes, cakes with unintentional references to prison, etc.
Jen and John, you should do whatever you need to do for your own health and happiness.
Perhaps you could have some of your able assistants write the blog and moderate comments and so forth, while you take a well-deserved break?
That would be better than closing down the show, or selling the web site, in which case it would probably end up as a domain name for some especially nasty porn site.
I am STILL giggling. Suppressed laughter could not handle that last one! :-) Way to "go," Jen!
Im so glad you guys are not shutting down today. I read both blogs everyday! Tthe are the first 2 pages I log onto every evening after work..Thanks for the laughs.
So Glad you're still here! It's my daily touchstone for a laugh, and you've made me look at "art" in a whole different way.
That last one? With the "peaches"? Just to make things even MORE inappropriate, I've worked in a nursing home for almost a year now and that looks an awful lot like a skin disease one of the patients has. So trust me, that picture is a LOT worse when you've actually had to clean a "stem" off a "peach" just like that. :P
I'm soooooooo glad your not leaving us yet! I like so many others start my morning off with Cake Wrecks and a great laugh. Thank you for all your hard work!!
January 17 is the new Thanksgiving. Without turkeys. (glances around) Okay, with a different type of turkeys.
I'd rather think you both were okay and doing well somewhere than have CW exist and you be miserable and stressed. Take care of yourselves and each other.
Until further notice Celebrate Everything.
I nearly had a panic attack when I thought this blog was ending. I had to read it 3 times just to make sure! Whew!
I think this is a Manilow Moment: "You see I can't smile without youuuu / Can't smile without you..." If you stop blogging, I'll have to sing the whole thing. And we don't want THAT!
Thanks for all your hard work and humor all these years. You brighten my day!
I had a few moments of hyperventilating when I starting reading today. You guys have made me laugh on days when I didn't want to get out of bed. I'm not sure if you know how many people's lives you have touched with this blog. That being said, I would hate for your health to suffer for this. We can live without Cake Wrecks, but the world would be a whole lot less funny. I agree with the others who have suggested less posts or guest posters. Thanks for still being here today. I love you guys (in a totally non-creepy way of course!).
Oh my,
I don't think I will ever want "bun" like pastries with chocolate dollips ever again. Ever! Not that I recall ever wanting that in the first place...just sayin'.
My mom introduced me to this blog months ago and I must say that I have spent MANY hours laughing and snorting to myself while reading the posts. I am glad you'll keep blogging away for a while longer. I will happily keep reading...and snorting :)
I'm very relieved that you're not ending the blog. It's the most reliable way for me to get a good chuckle after a long day at work. Thanks for keeping me laughing!
If you're thinking of shutting CW down for personal reasons, we'll miss you, but wish you more than well! If it's because you're unsure if we still love you all and this blog: BALDERDASH! BALDERDASH, I say!!!
Either way, mille grazie for all the wonderfulness that is CW!
Live long and wrecksper (???),
Bonnie :)
Jen, This is the first time I have ever commented. But it seemed appropriate to tell you on this terribly non-eventful day that your two blogs are the only ones I read. (And the occasional blogs you suggest). Cake wrecks makes me laugh to the point of utter roommate annoyance, and Epbot makes me want to glue pennies onto every flat surface in my house. You are hilarious, and amazingly crafty, and remind me of all of my favorite friends. Thank you for all the hours you've spent!!!
I am so glad you guys decided to keep this going. I love cake wrecks and would be lost without all the happy hoo hoo cakes and the disgusting cake at the bottom..ahem lol. Thank you for making me laugh hysterically and scare my neighbors :D.
I have to join the crowd and say I love your blogs and would miss them a lot...but I agree that you have to take care of yourself. Many many of us have learned to care about you as people, rather than just* generators-of-funny-content, so do what you have to do, knowing that you are truly appreciated. If that means you have to cut back or have guest bloggers or not write another book and the trolls complain about it...well, trolls are meant to be ignored, right? And if that's not enough and you need to stop the world so you can get off for a while...we'll cope. We probably won't laugh as much, but we'll cope. At least then you won't have to go on another 5-week(!!!!) book tour, which was above and beyond the call of duty in the first place.
Thanks for the laughs, the giggles, the snorts, the shudders, and the sights that make me want to *run away*! I'll enjoy them for as long as they last.
* Just some of the best, that is.
Having both worked in high stress situations, and both having to leave those jobs due to health reasons, we would totally understand if you have to close down one or both blogs.
"Laughter is the best medicine." This quote sums up how we view and experience CW.
@ Haiku Joy- magnifique!
Ah, Jen and John, how we would miss you if you left. But Vicky and Annie and Julie (and various others) are right, you mustn't be pressured into continuing something you don't enjoy any more. If it's bringing you more pain than pleasure, it's not worth it, and it'll show in your writing. I love the idea about guest posts. I bet you've got some celebrity admirers out there who'd LOVE to contribute once in a while, hmm? In the meantime, and if you want to, why not publish three times a week instead of six? I bet everyone here would rather have fewer posts that you could enjoy writing than none at all. I know, that's a really obvious idea and one you probably already thought of. Still, I'm betting a lot of folks out there would back it if it meant you could keep writing! :o)
Take it easy and be proud of what you've achieved. It's not easy spreading sunshine into people's lives, and you two do that on a daily basis. It's very much appreciated.
Jen I found your site a few months ago..thanks for the many laughs u have given me while I looked at every page.I've show the site to several ppl and they love it too!
I, too, am a reader of both blogs ,but not a commenter. I, too, have to say I'm so glad both blogs are still here. And, as others have said, I understand the stress and pressure. If you need a break, take one. Go on vacation without having to post a single thing. (let us know in advance, of course, that you're on vacation with no internet and will be offline for a week or whatever.) I suspect you'll miss the blogs. Or you might have some minions - er, helpers or substitutes or guests - posting in your absense. You need to do what you need to do to be happy, helathy, and creative. I think most of us know that, understand that, appreciate that, and love these blogs enough to come back after you've taken a short hiatus (short-ish?).
Thank you for all you do. And thank you for continuing to do it.
Don't leave us!!!!!!!!!!
this is my favorite website!!
Oh. My. Goodness! I laughed so hard I had an asthma attack and tears streaming down! I just found your site. Thank you for making my day :)
Thank you soooooo much for the joy and laughter you bring to us every day!!!!!!!!!! I would probably cry for months if you shut down Cake Wrecks, but I think I speak for all readers when I say I understand if you cut down on posts to make things easier for you and John. Thank you for turning my bad days around and bringing a smile to hundreds of people's faces everyday. You truly make people's lives happier with the little laughs you bring us everyday. Oh, and I don't think it's possible for you to be un-funny even if you tried.
-12 year old reader
P.S. because of you i spend an extra 10 minutes in the grocery store searching for wrecks at the bakery section, not that that's a bad thing ;)
Very glad you're continuing the blog!! Take care of yourself, though--take breaks if you need to! We'll still be here when you get back!
Also just wanted to mention that I was TOTALLY impressed that you went dark today to protest SOPA!
ZOMG I am so glad you are not shutting down!! I was so sad last night when I read your Epbot post. This website it a little bright spot in my day that always makes me laugh out loud.
Blog, I love you so! Please don't go! Please don't go! (lalalala bad humming here to hide the fact that I don't know the lyrics)
I am very glad you are NOT going anywhere. I love this blog. Thank you for bringing happy into my life on a daily basis!
Your SOPA blackout was enough to scare me into emailing my senators. My formerly esteemed California senators. The Wikipedia blackout I could handle, but no Cake Wrecks? No Epbot? aaaaaagh
Thank you Jen for supporting SOPA. I'm a female reader in IT, and it's neat that you did this. You reach a really broad audience, so you'e really raising awareness which is amazing. And brave! (since it was 1 day of ad revenue lost.) You have my admiration and a big thank you!
Jen, I'm glad that you won't go to end here at this pont.
But first of all. take care of yourself, please.
I'm living in Japan and NEVER seen such a fascinating, funny or terrible cakes.
I really like to visit here, enerything is fresh for me.
Potential shutdown of Cake Wrecks? Nearly had a Heart Wreck. (Or maybe it was a Pants Wreck, the one occasion that would make those last cakes appropriate. If Pants Wrecks were celebrated, that is. They aren't, are they? 'Cause I think someone owes me a .... never mind.)
Anyhoohoo, the less selfish, nearly noble aspects of myself would encourage you to fill your need to take a break but my dark, selfish, two-sizes-too-small heart never wants you to leave. The one brain fragment that can operate more maturely than a kindergartener adds: But only if you can do it happily ever after. (Happyhoohoo-ily ever after!)
I cant help but notice that there was no post yesterday. I'm beginning to think that you may have decided to end the blog with an announcement of no ending. Very Zen.
Like so many others, I just wanted to tell you that CakeWrecks has been a favorite ever since I first learned about it, and I hope this is not the end. But you should certainly post only as much as you enjoy. Thank you for the fun you've brought me.
I discovered your book and blog less than two weeks ago. They make me laugh so hard, I cry. I've shared the book with my coworkers and sent links to the blog. It has made several people laugh and get them over their bad moods. I've never followed a blog before, but I make it a point to stop by here daily. :)
One of my laid off coworkers loved it so much, he wants a cake wreck for his last day. His particular favorites are "Nobody Loves You" and "Go Die in a Car Fire". Our resident baker refuses to write mean things, but has agreed to misspell his name and whatever message we end up choosing.
Yours it the ONE and ONLY blog I read daily (well, except for Saturdays of course) and honestly I just don't feel my work day is complete until I've checked in here and had my morning laugh.
That last cake.....wow. There are no words.
Thank you, thank you for sticking around!
Maybe guest bloggers could help you out if you need a break? They might not have you're snarky je ne sais quoi which is near and dear to me, but everybody needs a temporary change of scenery sometimes.
Then your readers could lure you back cake crumb-by-cake-crumb...
You cannot end this blog! I literally think I just peed my pants because of these inappropriate creations!! I look forward to your posts - they are always genuinely laugh out loud funny!!
I agree with everyone else. I almost shat when you said you were thinking about shutting this down! We love cake wrecks. I turned a bunch of co-workers on to it when I worked at a grocery store..the bakery folks loved it! I needs me my laughs. Thank you for all the work you do. I rarely comment, but I frequently visit (I usually like to save up about a week, so I have a few pages of rofl-goodness!)
Merry Hoo Hoo to you, too!