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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Friday
Jan082010

Funny Business

NOTE: Getteth thine kiddies hence! (Translation: today's post is not for the youngun's!)

These clowns seem pretty excited about their cupcakes.


No, I mean really excited.


No, no. I mean REALLY excited.

"Oh! Uh. Hi, guys. Heheh. So, what's up?

"What are we doing? Who - us? Uh...nothing? Yeah, nothing. Nothing at all. Sooo....yeah. Listen, can you close that door again on your way out? And turn the Jimmy Buffett CD back on? Thanks. Yeah. You, too. Ok, then. Bye!"

"So I says to her, 'hey, baby, don't let the tiny clown car fool you; it's not the way you throw the cream pie, it's the way you put the tutu on the dog!' And she was all, 'What?' and I was like, 'never mind.' Yeah."

And then, just when you thought it couldn't get any worse...

Something like this comes along:

Whatever you do, DO NOT click on this picture to see it full size. Srsly. Don't do it.

[whistling]

Ok, now that you've clicked on the picture to see it full size - care to join me in a "I could've gone my whole life without seeing clown tinkle toys" scream? Groovy.

AAAAAAUUUUGGGHHH!!

Keith R., Will B., Jane O., Amy F., & Nicole V., I nominate "tinkle toys" as the new clown-bits euphemism for 2010. Any seconds?

- Related Wreckage: Coulrophobia Cakes

Note: The tinkle toys in the last picture were supposed to be buttons. Pink buttons.

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Reader Comments (265)

So one has to wonder just exactly what it was the Wreckerator thought that extra...um...the...uh, that was supposed to be? Are there a lot of tri-lower-limbed clowns on his/her home planet?

There's just no way that's not 17 kinds of wrong. None.

January 8, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterdulcinea

That last set of clown must have come from a pedophilia's dream bakery. How wrong- how very, very wrong! Aren't there supervisors who walk around checking on their staff's work with comments or a trash can ready?

January 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterSue

I really, really do not know how i ever went a day in my life without such a great laugh from Cake Wrecks! Thank you so much for making me laugh every day!

January 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterLindsay

Those are just. so. wrong.

WHY would they use flesh colored icing? WHY?? that's not an easy color to make, unless they WANTED to make the clowns nekkid. sure they're buttons....especially on that one on the far RIGHT in the picture....It's like a nudist clown colony whack-off party.

what's the concept of clowns sprawled over cupcakes anyway (face up OR face down?)

Bojangles #2 looks like he's at a Mardi-Gras party.

wv: monalmog--apparently what a group of clowns sound like when they "come" together....

January 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

That picture actually made me say "Oh my god!" out loud to an empty house. For some reason I wasn't expecting little clown private parts.

January 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterApril and Ashley

Loved this post!

January 8, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterjess

At first they looked disturbingly like armless naked clowns (right, Stumpy?) until I noticed a pattern...the icing has a seam in it that makes it look like a right arm, with the "hand" hidden in the vicinity of the "buttons" (aka as tinkle toys!)

January 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Oh, god! As if I wasn't scared of clowns enough already, now I have to picture them nekkid, too?!?!?!

January 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJasry

lol clown porn

January 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMichelle S.

LOL, AWWWWWWW, LOL. Too funny.

Thanks

January 8, 2010 | Unregistered Commentersweetbabies00

I didn't know they made Joker henchmen cupcakes! Scary!

January 8, 2010 | Unregistered Commentertracy

Wow! I am cackling enough to wake up the whole house. If this is what we get from Jen taking a rest day...take more rest days! Fantastically funny.

January 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterBecca

OK, my jaw dropped (literally, not figuratively!) when I -- despite all warnings -- clicked on the picture to see it full size. Oh, MY!

January 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterBridey

Now I know why Wakko Warner was afraid of clowns. Of course, who’s he to talk; he wasn’t wearing any pants, either.

“It's like a nudist clown colony whack-off party.” FTW!!!

^..^
Tigerwolf

WV - anglog: The fallen tree limb where film director Mr. Lee is sitting between takes.

January 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterTigerwolf

I can totally see how people could be afraid of clowns with those!

<3 Betsy
http://www.javacupcake.com

January 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJava Cupcake

I would never have thought to enlarge that photo had you not warned us against it. Sneaky, very sneaky!

January 8, 2010 | Unregistered Commenter5thsister

That was just absolutely scary! I am in shock that there were actual cupcakes and cakes like that! I have no words...no words. I am forever scarred.

January 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterDavid/Brianna

These are for some crazy ladies bridal shower, right? One who really loves clowns or is she marrying a clown?

Imagine the horror that would be the wedding cake...

January 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAthena

That was scary. And I'm not even afraid of clowns. X_X

January 8, 2010 | Unregistered Commentersasagawa-chan

My husband made me click. I can never get rid of that image! And I love how those clown feet look like toes with rotten toenails.

January 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

tinkle toys.

i cant.. stop.... laughing....

January 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

The last picture made me think "Wow, so much yummy icing. I'd have to wipe the penis off before I ate it, though."

January 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterCatherine

Speaking of "tinkle toys", did you know the Christmas song "Silver Bells" was originally supposed to be "Tinkle Bells"?

January 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAmanda

Bwahahaha!!! That last photo has the clowns all lined up, like the clown car has stopped at the X-rated movie theater and they all went in together. I guess it's going to be tough for the police to identify them now!

January 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Are they in clown straitjackets, or are they holding their hands behind their back, sort of like "Ta daa!"?

January 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterSheila

I know I shouldn't be surprised by anything I see on here anymore, but SERIOUSLY?!?! How can those people try to put those cakes/CCC's (ptooie) out and not see the problems? It's one thing to misspell words and make general ugliness, but this is seriously GROSS!! And clowns are supposed to be for kids, so it's even worse! Arrrrgh! The madness of some people!

January 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterLindsey

OMG that was way too funny, and yeah like I would NOT click on the picture after that, LOL ; ) I can not believe all of those, no wonder I don't like clowns they are just ummm freaky yeah there is the right word....

January 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAmy Ellen

You told us not to, but if you really didn't want us, why mentionn it at all?

Sneaky, very sneaky

Today's post was all a ploy to get the phrase "tinkle toy" into everyone's vocab! haha :)

Ahh Cake Wrecks, you make my day!

January 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterBecca

On the subject of Clown Tinkle Toys, I would have bet they had stripes, but I was wrong.

January 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterDoug Warren

There is no way this wasnt intentional! you would have to be blind not to see what this looks like!

January 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterBrandy

I've never seen a more crotchified set of buttons!

January 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterHeatherLeah Wright

Yikes, that first one. I'm surprised he doesn't have a miniature cigarette.

And that's all I trust myself to say. The rest...uh...no comment! XD

January 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMelissa (& Billy)

Omg! Clowns are creepy anyway, but flashing clowns.............

January 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I was noticing the gummy worm cupcake next to them too... weird!

January 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Blogger Doug Warren said...

On the subject of Clown Tinkle Toys, I would have bet they had stripes, but I was wrong.

Oh. Oh, my.

*gigglesnort*

-Jenn

January 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJenn

Thanks for both my first laugh of the day, and my new fave phrase of "tinkle toy."

January 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMMTyler

Is it just me or do those last clowns appear to be in straight jackets with their clown junk exposed - how twisted!

January 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterWanna Bee

My eyes! My eyes! I'm gonna have daymares alll day now.

Quick the SOS pads to scrub my eyes!

That is just so not right.

But you made me smile and I needed that. The Jr Hi kids just left for lunch (now I won't be able to eat mine)

January 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterOnyx

This post is precisely why we all keep reading your blog. Funny does not even begin to cover it!

And if you need a third on the Tinkle Toys?

Third!

January 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterFluffy Cow

That's the second time in two days I looked at something and went "Oh, that's a penis." (For the record, I was watching deleted scenes of Love Actually" and one of the Christmas Nudie Artworks was four full frontal naked guys) I don't know why I shared that with strangers or felt the need to justify myself for strangers, but there you have it.

January 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJenni

Oh. My. The naked clowns...who's idea was it to make them peachy colored? And why do their legs look like big toes? And why...just why?

January 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterBecky

Absolutely the funniest blog you have ever posted!! I was laughing so hard I'm crying - at work!! (And that was before I even clicked on the last picture!!)

(I may need to mention that I just took my first course of cake decorating and have made a few clown cupcakes since... and I'm also taking clown classes...)

January 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterCyndi

OH MY GAAWWDD.. No wonder people have a fear of clowns.. *shudder*

Did anyone else notice the clown in the very back left? What's he up to? One of the guys in the middle row has turned around to see what's going on.

January 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterBrooke

The last pic is the clown convention going through the TSA to get on a plane.

January 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

You have to wonder about these bakeries, don't ya? I mean, we get a warning to get our kids out of the room here on Cake Wrecks, but do the bakeries that created these atrocities post such warnings? What kind of questions would we face from our children after simply taking them to choose their birthday cake? I shudder to think!

January 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

What I truly TRULY don't understand about the last one (other than why it exists in the first place) is how the clowns can manage to be naked AND in straightjackets at the same time!

January 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterLaurenH

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=533_egKX09o" rel="nofollow">THEY DO COCAINE!

Yes, metalheads read and love this blog.

January 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterTeratoMarty

Wow. Someone actually frosted penii onto clown cupcakes. This makes Mapplethorpe look like Norman Rockwell (not really).

January 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Thanks for making my day! Of course I HAD to enlarge the last picture...I laughed so hard that it woke up my drowsy kitty cats!

January 8, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

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