It's Your Big Day, Deer!

I've always thought hunting-themed cakes were somewhat inappropriate for a groom's cake. In fact, when it comes to distasteful metaphors, I'm pretty sure this has the best shot at killing the mood:

Hey, the only thing missing is a little veil on the dead deer's head! That's right, blushing brides: You've been bagged and tagged...WITH LOVE.

Also, check out the poor little doe standing nearby. You can almost hear her saying, "Henry? HENRY, SPEAK TO ME!!" (Because all male deer are named Henry. Obviously.)

So, in addition to insinuating that the groom has metaphorically killed the bride - who is a male deer (have fun, Freud!) - the metaphor is also saying he broke up another couple in the process?

Wow.

Um...

Ice cream with that?

You know, K.J., my own wedding theme was "The Search is Over," because John and I like 80s ballads. After seeing this, I'm thinking we should have gone with "Hit Me With Your Best Shot" instead. "Fire away!"

Oops! They Did It Again

Will you guys ever get tired of seeing wedding missed marks? 'Cuz I'm thinking, "no."

Let's test that theory, shall we?

What the bride wanted:

What the bride got:

That'll buff out.

A lovely leaf motif:

And a lovely...oh good grief:

Actually, that leaf design is so popular I have two wedding wrecks based on it:

Whoah. This baker needs to make like a tree, and get out of tree decorations.

(Hm. I feel like that line didn't go quite right. Maybe I should follow it up with something clever.)

So.

YEAH.

(Theeere we go.)

This next one's in reverse order; here's what Anthony L's bakery replaced another bakery's initial wreck with, and with only an hour and a half to do so before the wedding started:

Not bad for less than two hours' work, right?

Especially when you compare what the original cake (again, from another bakery) looked like:

Am I the only one who thinks this looks like Play-Doh? I keep expecting it to spring to life, claymation style. And then maybe turn into a giant demon dog and terrorize a nerdy New York accountant.

Just me?

Here's a fun, modern pattern:

Aaaaand the fun stops HERE:

It's never a good sign when your cake is crying.

Goodness gracious, great balls on wires!

Seriously. They're like shiny little bubbles of joy - totally cute.

These, on the other hand, are just...

...balls.

Thanks to Krista V., Emily B., Allison I., Anthony L., Tempest J., & Sarah B. for feeding our horrible wedding wreck obsession.