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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Throw The Bouquet (Away)

I can't tell you how many wedding Wrecks I've seen salvaged with nothing more than a few well-placed bunches of fresh flowers.

These...are not those saves.

Believe it or not, that's a 3-tiered cake. See how effectively the gigantic seed pods hide the flaws in the top tier? They ran out for the bottom two, though, and were forced to randomly spill stuff on the table cloth to help "distract the eye." Cocoa powder or dirt? That is the question.


Other questions come to mind here, however:

Questions like: "Why?" and, "Why?" and, "For the love of pretty pastry platters, WHY?!?"


Since fresh flowers do have the nasty tendency of dying, though, I bet some of you are asking why bakers don't just use fake ones.

I will answer your question [dramatic pause]...with another question:

Ever contemplate sucking icing off a fabric leaf?

(Don't worry, this was not a wedding cake. It was a 20th wedding anniversary cake. Which, you know, makes it all better.)

Still, at least you can always count on silk flowers to be dust-free, hygienic, and easy to sanitize. That's why it's OK to just jam them all in the icing:

[blink blink]


[wiping eyes] Dust free! Heehee! Ah, I crack myself up sometimes.


You know, Amy, Kasey R., & Anony M., I give "deadpan" a good name. I call it "Fuzzywuzzkins."


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Reader Comments (8)

Those have to be the ugliest cakes I've ever seen - and considering how long I've been following Cake Wrecks, that covers a lot of territory. That last one, from the shaggy icing to the plastic flowers, makes my eyes water. Or, maybe those are tears.

January 31, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterLady Anne

Why go to the trouble to crack yourself up when you have us to help?
Listen to the reggae sound of Bo Arley......telling the unfortunate to not worry.
About a thing!! Because
Every little thing
Gonna be uptight!
Yaaz, Mon...that be right.......

January 31, 2018 | Unregistered Commentersendingtheclowns

Are those frozen peas on the second cake ? LOL

January 31, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterGayle

Silk, plastic,or made out of bird feathers pulled out of a cat's mouth's more or less crap.
Who brought the saw? We're all getting let's get the show on the road!

January 31, 2018 | Unregistered Commentersendingtheclowns

3 good reasons to bring along Twinkies to a wedding reception.

January 31, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterAl the K

I'm getting teary over that romantic inscription on the cakeboard: "This insert for use with 14" foil-covered cake drum."

I blame Jen for the place my brain went next:
"I'd like to thank the bridesmaids, the groomsmen, my mother, and please all raise your glasses to my darling, one-and-only, 14" Foil-covered Cake Drum. Oops, I promised I wouldn't call him that outside the bedroom. Sorry, sweetie."

February 1, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterAA

I am really wondering what happened to the brides that saw these cakes? Did they go on an angry rampage and throw the cake at the wreckerators or did they just sit back and wonder what the heck went wrong? Lol I feel so bad for them.

February 2, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterArlene Marie

I thought those were peas on the cake too!!!

February 2, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterKaySalo

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