HE SEES YOU: A Holiday Horror Story

[movie announcer guy]:  

This Christmas... 

get ready...

for a one horse...

open...

SLAY.

 

 "AAAIIIIEEEEE!!"

Run as fast as you can...

[insane giggling]

And don't go outside:

"ZOMBIE PENGUIN!"

And never...

"THEY'RE COMING!"

EVER...

"Oh, thank goodness we found you, Santa! ....Santa?"

"AAAAAIIIIEEEEE!!!!"

...FALL ASLEEP. 

"He's not real. He's not real. HE'S NOT REAL."

 

 "He's... right behind me, isn't he?

"Great. Juuuuust great."

 

[child singing]

He sees you when you're sleeping

He know when you're awake

He knows if you've been bad or good,

So be good...

 

 ...OR DIE.

Thanks to Erinn M., Aymara A., Gene H., Ben & Janelle, Chandria D., Zach R., Ann H., & Shannon S., who better watch out, and they better not cry, because wusses get left behind.

*****

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Comments

[Mindy1]

AAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGGHHHHH

[Lynne]

Fortunately that Teddy Bear cake has no arms to grab me with. He can only stare.

[Mike]

1) Is this a teapot covered with icing and flotsam?
2) Someone forgot to tell the gingerbread man that stripes and plaid don't go together.
3) I think this is the em-spoor-er penguin.
4) It looks like this is where the penguin did his business. Those poor snowmen don't know what's about to hit them.
5) Poor Santa. Someone stuck some pine roping right under his nose and it's aggravating his asthma.
6) Mrs. Frosty is crying because her husband became a victim of climate change.
7) I wonder what Mr. Snowman did to get on Santa's naughty list?
8) No Christmas this year. The Bumble came back from his Florida vacation all tanned and fit. Then he got hold of Santa, ate him and stuck his head on a pike. He's saving the reindeer for later.

[Lady Anne]

The 'toes" on that teddy-bear-cum-Santa resemble human fingers! Ee-yii!

[FM]

I will dream about that gingerbread man tonight. I will wake up screaming.

[SusanD]

Thanks for this - it makes the family holiday get-together look absolutely fun and friendly in comparison!

[Deb]

The teddy is terrifying. So is scalped, bleeding Santa.

[SaraCVT]

This reminds me of the Weird Al song “The Night Santa Went Crazy”, long a staple in our house (yeah, we’re weird; we also always watch “A Wish For Wings That Work”, which nobody’s ever heard of either. “Wings, Mr. Santy Claus, I need new wings...”)

[Mike]

It’s like Chucky reborn as the Gingerbread Man. Brr!

[Dances With Lasagna]

I kinda like the Gingerbread Man. I'd eat him.

But those eyes! [shudder!] They have to go. I don't like peppermint candies, anyways.

[Arlene Marie]

Well say bye bye to any sleep if that gingerbread man or scalped Santa appear in my dreams lol. Wreckerators don't need a plot for a horror movie just keep making these horrors and that will do it.

[Morag]

That psycho bear has surprisingly small hands.

[The One who remains nameless]

Poor Santa. He tried to deliver toys to the Apaches.