Fourth Time's The Charm
May 4, 2012 In honor of Star Wars day today ("May the fourth... Get it?!) I couldn't resist cracking open what is quite possibly my favorite post ever written by Number1. Of course, I also couldn't resist adding a little more wreckage to it, since a tale this epic deserves wreckage of only the finest caliber. So, without further ado, here's Number1 to tell you a story...of a lovely lady...called STAR WARS.
Ok, so, the movie is set in space, "the final frontier," sometime in the future.
;)
Luke Skywalter is the pilot for the Star Ship Firefly:
;)
(That's the red boomerang thing.)
Skywalter has to save the beautiful Princess Leia from the evil grip of Dark Vader and his Terminators:
;)
"We will destroy Hans Solo by playing checkers."
In order to get past all of the Cylons, Skywalter makes some friends with magical powers:
;)
RD2D, CP3O and Spider-Man.
RD2D, CP3O, and Spider-Man follow Luke to the planet Vogon. There they find a short psychic Muppet in a swamp:
;)
Slimer.
Slimer tells Luke to "use the force," but Luke doesn't know what that means so he shoots him. (First.)
Luke and his gang then go back to the Enterprise to fight Dark Vader and rescue Princess Leia. Again.
;)
But the ship is now underwater, which makes it impossible to turn on their Life Savers.
Plus Dark Vader thinks it's unfair that Luke brought friends to help him fight, so Vader calls a friend of his own:
;)
Accio pixie power!!
But wait! Slimer pops up from the dead and casts lightning into Vader's helmet!
;)
Pew! Pew!
Vader falls to the ocean floor, and Slimer says, "You killed my father; prepare to die!" Then he crosses the tachyon streams to open a wormhole which sends Vader back to Gozer.
Then Luke, Slimer, CP30, RD2D, Scully, Mulder, and Superman all run to rescue the beautiful Princess Leia a third time, and she proclaims her love for Luke. (Which really annoys Yo Jabba Jabba, but I think that's more in the next movie.)
;)
DON'T BLINK.
And so they all live together on the island until John Locke finds himself dead in the coffin.
THE END
;)
Thanks to Anony M., Debra B., Autumn P., Amanda N., Sarah, Jessica H., Ruth K., Meghann H., and Matt B. And as the brown coats say, "Live long, and may the force be with you!" So say we all.
Reader Comments (110)
"Hans."
"Hans??"
"Solo"
(In case you haven't seen)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rDFlQINIgwk
Epic Greatness!
"Live long and proper" is not such a bad sentiment. I might put that on my kid's cake.
It look's like Slimer (Yoda) has grown some in the 8th picture! Who knew the water on Vogon could help growth disorders?
LOL! "Don't blink."
NNNNNOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!
A standing ovation for this post,loved it. Here's a slow clap for cakewrecks!
My husband and I were in tears reading this today! Dark Vador made a lot more sense after reading your Jan 12 posting on the Dark Vador Black Burger. You post was even funnier the second time around! Your posts have become by daily drug - Thank You!
Oh my gosh...you got me at the "Pew! Pew!" Happy Star Wars Day to you, fellow geeks! ;o)
With my Browcoat on I salute you. Very funny post today!!! =) And because you added the LOST reference.... ******HAPPY DANCE******* =) It upped your awesomeness.
Sarah's cake rochs!
Outstanding.
May the 4th Be With You and the odds be ever in your favor while you live long and proper!
So you're saying that after the transporter accident, Darth Vader turned into the Smoke Monster? With an army of reavers and spidermen?
So are Leia and Tink sisters? 'cause ya know, all that's missing in this story is a ticking crocodile…
This was awesome (as usual), but now I kind of want the Tinkerbell & Vader cake for my birthday on Monday! Thanks for the laughs today. May the 4th be with you!
Shouldn't that be "Live Long and Properly?"
'Scuse me while I go put on my Jayne hat.
so say we all!
Darth and Tinkerbell
Spidey, R2, Luke and friends
Live long and proper
(I think Spock would approve :))
This was one of THE most awesome posts, and I can't wait to see what our resident geniuses and funny ladies @Sharyn and @HaikuJoy have to say!
Hmmm, this sounds much like Anna Russel's recap of Wagner's Ring Cycle. Love 'em both - the recaps, especially.
Is it bad that I completely understood every reference made in this post? I am such a geek! Ha ha! Totally made my day! LOVE Cakewrecks!
So much geeky nerd humor!!! I
'm not sure if I want to cheer wildly at your fabulous wit or weep for the masses that don't fully understand what they have done to the innocent souls that ordered these cakes.
May the 4th be with you!
"Live Long and Proper" sounds like something a Vulcan Miss Manners would say.
Happy Star Wars Day and Happy Avengers!!
Good gravy! This was the best. post. ever.
So much awesomeness in one post...what a work of art! (Even if the cakes aren't...)
Hahahaha. Wow. I'm not even a Star Wars fan but the mix up with Star Trek was a doubleface palm.
Noodles beat me to it.
[Editor's note- So long story short, we accidentally deleted the comment from Noodles. Basically, it said that RD2D was wrong and we should fix it. Um, Noodles? I think I would *know* if RD2D was wrong. I'm like, the biggest Star Trek fan. (shaking head) Wreck On, everybody. -john]
You had me at RD2D. I love the way it sounds when you say it out loud - RD2D, RD2D, RD2D. Duck - my office mate just threw a shoe at me. (can't wait until someone says that you spelled it wrong - Epcot)
It never would have occurred to me (in a million light years) to put Dark Vader and Tinkerbell on the same cake. Although the Pixie Dust looks more like Pixie Pee Pee.
Applause!!!!!
Ridiculously awesome :) My favorite part is RD2D - go ahead, say it out loud.....heh heh :)
Ev and Noodles, please tell me your tongues are in your cheeks...lol
LS: I can see the good in you, Father. Come back over to the right side.
DV: No, my son. You see, this side has cookies.
LS: Ah, but Father, you are forgetting.
DV: Forgetting what?
LS: This side has cake.
Awesome crossing of the streams!!
"Live long and proper" works on so many different levels - love it
A long time ago in a bakery far, far away…
Episode VII, Completely Hopeless
It is a period of decorating war. Rebel flotsam, striking from a hidden bucket, have won a sticky victory against the evil Galactic Airbrush. During the battle, plastic spies managed to steal the baker’s secret weapon, the Icing Bag, a device with enough power to misspell every word in the universe. Pursued by agents of terrible taste, Princess Tink races home aboard her wrinkled cake, custodian of the stolen frosting that can save her people and restore grammar to the galaxy…
Kudos on the Ghostbusters reference to Gozer. Also, I especially love the bit about Skywalter shooting Slimer/Yoda first (special edition facepalms)! :)
This is one of the best posts ever!
I love Sarah's cake! And this post. I'm trying not to cause the other patrons in this restaurant to look at me funny.
Thank-you @noodles and@ev. I will now be heading to the bunker....anyone else coming?
Favorite. Post. Ever.
This post has achieved Ludicrous Speed.
Smoke 'em if you've got 'em.
Best post ever, still laughing at "He shoots him (first)"
All I can think of with RD2D is "rootie tootie," which made me snort. I heart Endor Slimer. He's surrounded by wee cupcake trees and he appears to have an ewok coming out of his chest. So a bit of Alien thrown in for good visual measure.
Ev, Noodles, that's kiiiiiiinda the point, methinks ;)
*dives into the Epcot bunker*
The cake decorations are most illogical. However we must salute these big, damn heroes, with their pH.ds in Horribleness. They may not be the droids we are looking for, but lots of planets have a north.
This post, ah, let me explain how I feel. No. There is too much, let me sum up: LOVE!
@Kathy and Mom A: Hee! It is fun to say! RD2D, Oh Rudy! RD2D-ee-ee! Oh Rudy! A whop bob-a lu a whop bam boo!
@Sarah, I want that cake, too!
@Kathy, maybe she should have been called "Tinklebell"!
Best wreckage EVER! I love your blog but never comment. That's how much I enjoyed todays post.
Cake #2's red boomerang thing is a bad attempt at the symbol for the rebel alliance. They also butchered the symbol for the empire, making it look like a hub cap. Very hilarious post.
/yes I am a nerd
I actually like the Tinkerbell/Darth cake, because I bet Sarah is a soulmate of Katie (of the lunch box). Minus points for the wreckerator sitting on the cake, THEN decorating it quite nicely. Extra points for sound use of gel icing.
@Andrea - thanks for sticking that song in my head for at least the rest of today :-)
@zoomom - loving Tinklebell!
This was pure, stream-crossing perfection! I can't wait to show it to my kids when they get home from school.
Tinker Bell definitely belongs on the Darth Vader cake. She was a murderous little pixie. Not all sweetness and light like the Powers of the Mouse would have you believe now.
Accio pixie power, indeed!