The Cat's Meow

{cue sexy saxophone music}

"Oh my... Hello, beautiful lady. I didn't see you come in. Welcome to The Kitty Den, where all of your wildest fantasies can come true. I was just about to slip out of this stiff collar and enjoy a fresh bottle of wine by the fire. Won't you... join me?"

"This wood is big enough for two."

"Or purrrhaps you'd prefer to snuggle with someone a bit more... soft?"

"His claws have been trimmed and he was flea-combed just for you, baby."

"But maybe you're the kind of girl who likes things...dirty."

"Our alley cats are ready for a roll in the hay (or chocolate shavings, if you so desire)."

"That's right, sugar. Here at The Den, our fancy felines fire all of your foxy fantasies."

"Oh, don't mind Gary. He's just our I.T. guy."

Thanks to Violet, Ginger, Kat (how appropriate), and Mary for these handsome hunky hairballs. Mrrow...

- Related Wreckage: Stop the Insanity!

Sobering Celebrations

Choosing the right cake design to go with your message is key. After all, you wouldn't want anyone to get the wrong idea, now, would you?

Aw, now there's a warm welcome.

(And if you think an overly enthusiastic volunteer fire brigade might spell disaster, you're wrong. It spells "neiborhood.")

Baptism, baseball...they both involve dunking, right?

[UPDATE: I have just been informed that baseball does not, in fact, have dunking. Apparently that's hockey. My bad.]

Ah, Niko. That boy is creeping up on death like a herd of geriatric turtles. Why, it seems like only yesterday you were playing with Thomas the Tank Engine, huh, Niko? Maybe because it WAS only yesterday, but still.

(No, the 5 is not a typo; this really was for a fifth birthday party.)

Whoops, Karen T., Karen G., & Tammy C., apparently geriatric turtles come in flocks.

- Related Wreckage: Mixed Signals