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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Entries in Easter (7)

Thursday
Apr132017

These Chicks Are TOAST

SHHHHH. Listen.

Do you hear that?

 

The bunnies... are coming.

 

And they've got a name with your bullets on it.

("Isn't that supposed to be the other way arou...?"
"SILENCE!")

 

The bunnies will rip you from your shells!

 

Or smoosh you down INTO them really hard!

Which is super uncomfortable!

 

The bunnies have 'UUUGE pointy teeth.

 

And they stare at you like this when you ask how their day was:

So awkward.

Then they eat your soul.

 

But don't worry; they always go after the hot chicks first.

So what are you, a chicken?

EXCELLENT.

Then you can go first.

 

 

Thanks to Anneke D., Daniel C., Renae S., Ranae W., Emily S., Samantha S., Jessica & David, Caitlin W., Mai A., & Amada W. for that shining example of why you never put cute things in pairs holding hands.

*****

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Friday
Apr032015

Somebody, PLEASE, Explain The Green Beans

'Twas the week before Easter, and all through the bakery
The Bakers plopped plastic and all kinds of fakery

 

The chicks were wrapped snugly, each in her shell

"Too tight. TOO TIGHT!"

 

While visions of killer buns
turned sleep... into hell

"SOOOOOON."

 

Then out from the aisles
came a shriek, filled with hate!
So we set out our green beans:

And decided to wait.

 

His face looked like spiders

His ears, flaccid tubes

 

And when he turned 'round...
hang on, are those boobs?

 

His eyes were insane

 

His mouth smeared with drool

which dripped when he laughed
like blood in a pool

[shudder]

 

Then I heard him exclaim
ere he killed all the lights

 

"Hoppy Easter to all
and to all
, a good fright."

"Jolly Rancher?"

 

Thanks to Angela F., Kaci M., Tara F., Rick H., Amy Jo, Lisa J., Christina, Kelli M., Amber P., Stephen D., Lori W., & Mia C. for the hare-raising tail.

*****

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