Now THAT'S Italian

Today's post has a special Read-Along Feature!
Press play before scrolling down to get the full "Italian" flavor.

Ay everybody! Giusseppe Sarducci here froma Ma Biga Freakin Italiana Cake located ina beautiful downtown Trenton. We specialize ina making da biggest, freakina cakes you ever dida see. An we gotta somatin new!

Looka dat!

Even da leetle Bambina, she knows! She'sa sayin, "Ay! Dasa one biga freakina cake! I mean looka dat! What isa dat, lika twenty-seven feet a cake?! Who needsa more cake dena dat?!?

Now you might be asking youself, "Isa ma cake gonna be so beautiful like the one ina da picture?" You know it!

Firs, we starta wita da cake which isa twelve eenchess high, ten eenchess wide ana twenty-seven feet long. Den, we squeeze rowa after row ofa brown "icing" ona top.

[kissing fingertips] Bueno!

Denna, we take what we lika to call "dirt" ana we put dat ona top too!

Isa so beautiful!

Finally, we taka a biga tubba cream, ana put DAT ona top, too!

Everyting go ona top!

Ana one more ting! Ma uncle Guido, he make'a da bessa squiggles ana dots you eva dida see so we puta dose ona da cake too! It's mucho cucina bella farfalla cappelini lasagna!! Mach schnell!

So calla Ma Biga Freakin Italiana Cake today. Because ifa is nota Freakin Big...

...is nota cake! Ciao!

You mighta wanna check out our Five Minute University too!

Where Dreams Come Through

Welcome to BisneyLand, the amusement park that's in no way affiliated with Disneyland, but is just as good - and cheaper, too!

Once you enter the gates of our mystical castle-land of joy, you'll be greeted by our lovely royal ladies:

Cinderallie and her clear resin shoes are always the hit of the ball.

Princess Yasmine and her flying doormat will show you a "whole 'nother world."

And TinklesWell the Winged Wonder is sure to be your day's #1 delight!

We also have fabulous entertainment:

Princess Areola and her pals Haddock, Skittle, and Captain Crabby Pants may prefer life "under the ocean," but they still enjoy singing their big musical numbers, "Check Out My Cool Stuff," and "I Can't Talk, So Let's Make Out!"

Kids young and old will love dancing with Snow Light and her seven short friends with beards:

They'll soon have you "Hee-Hawing" off to your own place of employment!

And don't forget Pretty, our good-looking girl:


And of course her friend Not-So-Handsome!

Together they invite you to "be our visitor!"

Anony M., Allison M., Clau, David I., Amanda S., Mona S., & Kristyn, how crazy would it be if a place like this actually existed? Oh, wait...