My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Getting Ahead

I've been feeling a bit blah this week. Call it the post-holidays slump (I miss my Christmas tree), call it the winter blues (It's SO FREAKING HOT), call it Al - whatever the reason, I'm more inclined to lie on the couch and cruise Etsy or play Mario Kart than any of my usual, marginally more productive activities.

So, as of right now I've decided to hop on the ol' treadmill desk and write something really positive for once. Something life-affirming. Something cheerful. Something to remind myself I've got nothing to complain about.

Right after I show you this:

(Hint: It's NOT a guy on his hands and knees under a sheet.)

Wait for it...waaaiiit for it...

Ahh, there's the screaming.

And, whaddaya know? I feel better already!

Nope, no complaints here!


Thanks to Anony M. for sharing her winning entry in my unofficial "Worst Christmas Gift Ever" contest. You're a cut above the rest, my friend!


Thank you for using our Amazon links to shop! USA, UK, Canada.

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Reader Comments (88)

The horror....the unspeakable horror. D:

January 9, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterMindy1

Why always the giant nipples??? Why everything else, of course, but why the giant nipples?

January 9, 2018 | Unregistered Commenterkymdydyt

What's with than sideways vagina? I am a midwife: trust me , I've never seen a vagina look like that.

January 9, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterJoan

M-mommy? Why does it have hair and eyebrows?

January 9, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterLisa

Also, baker needs an anatomy lesson. Unless Mom is deformed.

January 9, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterWilliam

I wonder if that's supposed to look like the father.

January 9, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterClassic Steve

I know you all think you know what this is, a woman's torso giving birth to a full grown, ugly man. But you're wrong. It's some creature, not too unlike the Blob, but with a real mouth. What he's doing is open for debate, though. He's either regurgitating this ugly man because he tastes so bad, or he's have problems getting him swallowed because he didn't take his cue from Mr. Snake and eat him head first instead of feet first.

January 9, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterMike

Am I the only one noticing that the ... um... opening the head is coming out of is sideways?

January 9, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterJennifer

It's the wrong proportions for both the dude on his hands and knees and for the baby doing an Alien.

I know this is minor nitpicking.

January 9, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterMaxie

Jen, you get a HUGE smile from your Cake-wreck-a-holics like me my friend! A smile of course AFTER the screaming dies down. Can we say that this is the opposite of some people who have their heads up their arse?
Now, show us a cake of THAT one, I want to scream with laughter some more. Thank you for always giving me a chuckle, you do a great service to us all Jen and John (thoj). Bravo!

January 9, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterCookiemama

Guys, that's a C-section, not a deformed mother!

January 9, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterBin

For everyone saying the opening is wrong, I think this is supposed to be a C-section. Although, I don't think those are done length-wise, either, so .. .whatever. Back to screaming.

January 9, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterNansJns

So many questions.

Why is the person being born already an adult?

Why does the "mother" have nearly pornographic nipples?

Why does the wreckarator foresee that this adult man-baby is going to be born by cesarean?

Who thought that anything about this cake was a good idea?

January 9, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterAlicia

I think it's supposed to be a Cesarean section. Which doesn't make it any less horrific, but might explain why the opening is sideways...

January 9, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterSam

Ok, I kept trying to figure out the sideways lady jam, but after closer and more horrifying inspection, I’m pretty sure this troll baby is arriving via C-section.

January 9, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterLiz

Maybe it's a c-section. IDK.

January 9, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterKeith

The Caesarian-section birth of a full-grown hobbit (that IS Frodo, isn't it?)... Something I never thought I'd see reproduced in cake form...

January 9, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterKathy J

I'm going to hope they're doing a c-section. Even so, that cake is still far from okay.

January 9, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterPeachkins

Sideways vaginas--yet another unrealistic beauty expectation for women.

January 9, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterKelly

I'm assuming this manchild is being delivered or is delivering himself by c section with the drape and thoughtful horizontal incision so mom can still wear her bikini even though she is headless

January 9, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterJennifer

Re: the sideways anatomy comments - pretty sure it's supposed to be a caesarian. I hope.

January 9, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterH

Is it a C-section?

January 9, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterShanan

This is awful 😂 but the opening y’all are asking about it a C-section incision, know 😂😳

January 9, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterMMJ

I think it has to be a cesarean birth. It is the only explanation. But, I feel that it is missing something in that case. A lot of somethings.

January 9, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterGeri

It looks more like it’s supposed to be a c-section cake. Which is equally horrifying...

January 9, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterCfeath

Why is the opening sideways? Well, due to the positioning of the sheet and exactly where this man/baby creature appears to be emerging, I'm assuming this is a C-Section cake... As a person who has had 3 C-Sections it is the only thing that makes sense... So yeah, that just adds to this cake's level of wrong-ness....

January 9, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterSamieK

For those of you confused about the shape of the opening, it's not a vagina. It's a C-section. Still very very wrong, though.

January 9, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterHeidi B.

To all those posting about the means of exit: surely this is depicting a c-section? hence the white drapes?

January 9, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterKate

Re: the sideways vajayjay comments above. It’s a C-section. Still though. Blugh.

January 9, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterBrooke I

From what I can tell this is a C-Section Cake. That seems to be the only explanation for the lateral incision. Out pops baby! And to think that some bakers cringe at making cakes for same-sex weddings. Gah!

January 9, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterDennis

I think that's a C-section and not a deformity. I've also never seen a baby with a mustache before.

January 9, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterAmy S.

I 'think' it's supposed to be a C-section, which explains the placement and shape of the opening... maybe?
Still, so much wrongness.

January 9, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterHmmm

Methinks that could be a C-section situation... hence the sheet, sideways incision below the belly, etc. Still nothing short of "who... who thought THAT was a good idea???"

January 9, 2018 | Unregistered Commentercampingchick104

That's not a sideways vagina! It's a Caesarean. That's one hairy baby!

January 9, 2018 | Unregistered Commenterjo

I feel weird defending this cake, but that's a c-section, not a sideways vagina...right?

Of course, that doesn't explain why a gigantic-nippled torso is giving birth to an old man, so don't worry - we can still be plenty horrified at this cake. Right?

January 9, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterTreester

I'm no obstetrician, but I believe that "sideways vagina" is actually a Caesarian Section.


Excuuuuuuuse m-- [runs down hallway]

January 9, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterHairfish

Am I the only one who's had a C-Section? I believe that's what's being depicted here. At least I hope so.

January 9, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterHeidi

I’m assuming that since the man-baby seems to be coming directly out of the stomach, that it is a c-section cake, hence the angle of the opening.

January 9, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterKris

It is supposed to be a C Section. But baby cake faces scare me.

January 9, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterSheva

Im assuming its a cesearean section? Otherwise an ugly baby isnt her only problem...

January 9, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterMoonflwr912

It is not a sideways va-ja-jay. It is clearly a c-section!

January 9, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterMichelle

I will not be eating a ... section ... of this cake, because I C what they did there. And it's revolting.

January 9, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterAudrey

It’s a C-section! And why does the card say “Merry Christmas??”

January 9, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterLRuv

Lol I think that’s supposed to be a cesarean section?

January 9, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterKels

@Joan - I think it's supposed to be a Cesarean. Doula for 8 years here ;)

January 9, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterJoy

It's supposed to be a c-section, the drape and the sideways opening is the incision

January 9, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterMeg

I think this is supposed to be a c-section cake.

January 9, 2018 | Unregistered Commenterdedicated lurker

I'm thinking (hoping!) this is depicting a C-section. Please.

January 9, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterSpamgodess

Not sure if Magical Sideways Vagina or C-section Lips.

Either way, NOT COOL!

January 9, 2018 | Unregistered CommenterJessica

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