Getting Ahead
January 9, 2018 I've been feeling a bit blah this week. Call it the post-holidays slump (I miss my Christmas tree), call it the winter blues (It's SO FREAKING HOT), call it Al - whatever the reason, I'm more inclined to lie on the couch and cruise Etsy or play Mario Kart than any of my usual, marginally more productive activities.
So, as of right now I've decided to hop on the ol' treadmill desk and write something really positive for once. Something life-affirming. Something cheerful. Something to remind myself I've got nothing to complain about.
Right after I show you this:
;)
(Hint: It's NOT a guy on his hands and knees under a sheet.)
Wait for it...waaaiiit for it...
Ahh, there's the screaming.
And, whaddaya know? I feel better already!
Nope, no complaints here!
Thanks to Anony M. for sharing her winning entry in my unofficial "Worst Christmas Gift Ever" contest. You're a cut above the rest, my friend!
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Reader Comments (88)
Hi Ladies, just to help clarify, I believe this is supposed to be a c-section cake, not a sideways vagina cake.
So I’m going to give this baker the benefit of the doubt and assume this cake is for a planned c-section... although why dismembered Mom is inexplicably aroused while birthing a 45 year old creepy dude still remains unexplained.
Ok, I think I understand the sideways split. It looks like a c-section to me. The split is in the lower abs, not down lower, and the gown continues past the split. I had a c-section, so this looks about right. But if that man-thing had crawled out I might've assumed they werecutting an alien out of me. And still.... why these cakes?? WHY
Pretty sure it's a c-section cake. As others have pointed out the opening is sideways and I noticed way too close to the belly button for it to be a vaginal birth.
Does nobody else see a c-section cake? Because the baby is face down and the cut is horizontal?
I think everyone is seeing a baby come out of a vagina. I'm seeing a grown male little person coming out via c-section. Why bakers? Just...why?
Today I saw a youtube video about why babies in medieval paintings look like ugly old men.
The ugly baby does not have a pointy head and given its point of exit, my guess is that it's a c-section delivery.
This was a request from an OB Gyn doc for the office Christmas party. He actually requested a “baby busting out of a uterus”... but I couldn’t do it. So I did a c-section baby instead. The head returned the following year, I’m told, as a Christmas ornament! 😳
It's a C-Section - hence the sheet and the transverse incision. Still doesn't explain the adult head coming out though...
This cake is pure nightmare fuel, no doubt, but I needed to point out to everyone wondering if the baker needs an anatomy lesson that this is most likely a c-section birth cake, not a vaginal birth cake. This does -not- make this cake less terrifying though!
Pretty sure that the "sideways hole" is a c-section slice, not funky anatomy gone awry. I mean, that doesn't make any of this better... but it does certainly make sense.
Eeeeeeeeek! Cutting the cake would be like performing an actual c-section--on a headless, limbless torso. Please, please let it not be red velvet cake.
I'm surprised by the confused comments, but this seems pretty obviously like it's a C-section, not a vaginal birth. The belly button is way too close to the head for a vaginal birth, and the sideways slit seems like it's clearly a low transverse incision. Still horrifying, but at least it's not a vagina. Just a huge cut in someone's internal organs. Much better!
A possible c-section?!?!
It's showing the baby coming out of a c-section incision, I believe. Not an anatomically incorrect vagina.
The little sign saying "Merry Christmas!" in red and green is the finishing touch on this monstrosity.
That's not a sideways hoo ha. Pretty sure it's supposed to be a baby born via c-section.
Um...I didn't think they usually cut through the gown too for a c-section...
Is it possibly supposed to be a cake recreation if a C-section? Which would be even worse that a sideways VJJ. Who in their right mind would think that was a good idea??????? WWWHHHHHHYYYYY?
Guys, I'm pretty sure it's a c-section cake, thus the horizontal
Why does it have nipples?!?!?!?!?!
C-section, people. C-section.
I believe it is supposed to be a c-section
My reaction went something like this: reading it’s not a man under a sheet... ooohhhh...ohhhh, ewwww.
This reminds me of a phrase a very tired overworked doctor once dictated to me. He said that his patient had had a "normal spontaneous cesarean section ".
Www.graspingforjoy.blogspot. com
I think it’s supposed to be a c-section? The question here is why is the baby a full grown man.
If I am seeing it right, I think it’s supposed to be a C-section (hence the horizontal opening instead of the “traditional vertical”). Why she is giving birth to a grown man/alien, is beyond my comprehension.
Seems like a depiction of a C-section, which would explain why "things" appear sideways?!?
Oh. Em. Geeeee. Now I'm horrified! (But also slightly amazed that someone would actually WANT such a thing!)
I thought you guys should know that when I clicked through from FB, I got redirected to a "Congratulations Android User" page that wouldn't let me navigate back to Cake Wrecks. If it helps to know, the site was advs dot c d smart shopping dot com (but without spaces and with, we, you know... dots).
This is the second time I've encountered a similar redirect from this site in the last several weeks. Maybe a bad ad?
Oh heck thanks now I won't be sleeping any time soon lol. I would sooner watch IT to rid myself of this horror.
I would call my post-holiday blues “Al.” The sad part is that I’m in my early 20’s and I get that reference.
I liked it better when I thought it was a sideways vagina.
She must have had the C section because the baby looks to be about 60 months over due.
It's the birth of Benjamin Button!
Is that Alfred E. Neuman from MAD magazine coming out of that... opening?
Why does the tag on the box read “Merry Christmas “? Also, why does baby have a five o’clock shadow?