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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Tuesday
Jul262016

A Yelp For Help

Most chain bakeries have numbered order books, so you can just write down the code for the design you want.

For example, at this place, if you want a picture of a trophy you write down "SB1."

NAILED IT.

 

Beth S. didn't want any mix-ups, though, so to be EXTRA careful she wrote down the name of the design she wanted, not the number:

 

...which is how Beth ended up with this:

Doggone it.

 

Ok, you're thinking, but surely - SURELY - if you draw an actual diagram of the cake yourself, clearly labeled, this won't happen. Right?

Linsay K. agreed, so she carefully mapped out directions for drawing the Quebec flag on her friend's birthday cake:

She picked the color blue, then used a piece of paper to show the bakers just where to draw the four fleur-de-lis.

 

I think you'll agree, minions, that all of Linsay's hard work really paid off:

Eh?

 

Thanks to Veronica L. Beth S., & Linsay K. for giving me a new fleur-de-lis on life.

*****

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Reader Comments (32)

I want an SB1 cake.

I like the little added accent mark over the little added "e" in "Fleurdelise." It makes it so much more French.

July 26, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterSuBee

I'm definitely gonna name my next niece "Fleurdelisé" !!! (I named the last one Denise, and her brother Denephew.)

July 26, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterDominic

I swear I would effing THROW the cake at whatever pinheaded idiot offered me that last one in return for such clear, explicit, step by step, a b c 1 2 3 instructions.

July 26, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterBea

BWAH HAH HAH!!! that Paw Patrol one.

Gets 'em used to this kind of disappointment early. This way they'll be prepared for all those wedding wrecks later on. After all, doesn't every little girl start fantasizing about her wedding cake at about this age?

July 26, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterBea

If that's how they interpreted her instructions, I'd hate to see them actually attempt to draw a fleur-de-lis. I think she ended up with the best possible scenario. Egads!

July 26, 2016 | Unregistered Commenterlisadh

I think I've just lost all faith in humanity.

July 26, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterKimS

I don't believe I have ever literally banged my head against the wall on purpose. After viewing the last cake I am literally banging my head against the wall on purpose. WHYYYYY? HOWWWWW? NOOOOOOO!

July 26, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterSmarie

Sheeesh. These wrecks always seem unbelievable, but then the photographic proof is right there!

July 26, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterErica

Not gonna lie- these actually make me a little sad.

July 26, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterNagzilla

I'm with KimS. No faith AT ALL! Bhwa ha ha ha....... Too funny.

July 26, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterMaryO1230

On that last one, the wreckerator could have easily tried to pipe the fleur de lis and ended up with some puffy, white poo-wangs, so I think Linsay came out ahead on this one.

July 26, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterKelley

Please tell me that the last cake was NOT baked in Quebec. Please, please, please?

July 26, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterColin

For some reason, the parenthetical "He's French Canadian" just puts the last one over the top. Hilarious.

July 26, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterWill

These. Are. FANTASTIC!!! I'm cackling like a loon....

July 26, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterJulie

O...M...G...do these people know how to breathe?!?!?!

July 26, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterMindy1

(He's French Canadian)

That's all I needed right there...

July 26, 2016 | Unregistered Commenterhrhinson

Thank you for illustrating what a fleur-de-nope looks like... I'd say fire that baker but I don't want them bagging my groceries either... "Thirty cans and a loaf of bread don't go in one bag! And where did this come from?! I didn't even buy this...." Wow. Slow clapping for all.

July 26, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterNaughty Nautilus

Ok, now you're just messing with us. No way anybody really screwed up this badly. You're making these up.

July 26, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterJulie

if I were Beth, I wouldn't pay for that piece of crap cake she received. Considering that most people pick up the cake on the day of junior's party, there is no way that mess could've been fixed.

July 26, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterCathy

Job interview:

"Can you write your name in frosting?"

"Uh, yes?"

"Great! You're hired!"

July 26, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterRobin

If a cake tells me to "yelp for help" I have to wonder what exactly is in that cake? If the cake isn't about to attack me, why does it assume I need help?

July 26, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterAB

You see it here.

The human race is devolving back into apes.

July 26, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterNancy

You have gotta love it... on the last cake, they actually used the right letters even if they didn't space the words correctly. But, we all know that if she had asked for them to put the actual word "Fleur di Lise" on the cake they would not have gotten even one letter correctly.
This site is my happy place when first I get to work every evening.

July 26, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterSharon

I've just "borrowed" the SB1 image and credited Cakewrecks in a link.Thanks for the amusements,Jen.

July 26, 2016 | Unregistered Commenterdinahmow

These cakes prove that CakeWrecks has become too popular. It's blatantly obvious that these were all wrecked ON PURPOSE, just to get on CakeWrecks. I mean...how could anyone so utterly stupid as these wreckerators pretend to be even find their way to the bakery to work?!?

July 26, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterHairfish

My IQ dropped fifteen points just by looking at these wrecks.

July 26, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterDances With Lasagna

Dear Bea,


IabcI
I123123I
IabcabcabcabcI

Step by step, abc, 123 just the way you ordered, ma'am. ;-)

July 26, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterAdo_Annie

I am beginning to think some cake "decorators" sit up nights trying to think of ways they can screw up a simple design. Look over the book of samples and think, "Hmm, I could put a pile of poo here instead of a Yule log..."
That or these folks don't have wits enough to put on their own socks.

July 26, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterLady Anne

as a cake decorator myself....I'm loosing faith in my own field.

July 26, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterCakeQueen

No, no, no, NO, NO - please tell me cake decorators aren't this stupid!

July 26, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterKyle

How on earth can you mess up a cake when the customer gives you express instructions on how to do it? Either the wreckerator is just an evil minion loving to screw cakes up or they just like pretending they know how to decorate. Either way no way would I pay for that lol.

July 27, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterArlene Marie

I have a sneaking suspicious that the Yelp for Help cake is a fake wreck. The handwriting on the bottom is cursive and clearly professional, while the handwriting up top looks like something even I could manage. I say they saw the extra space and just decided to try to get on to Cake Wrecks. :I

July 27, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterCrocofi

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