These Horrifying Peep Shows Just Retroactively Ruined Easter
March 28, 2016 Remember when Peeps were just sweet Easter treats? That was nice.
Which of these nightmarish displays will give YOU the most therapy fodder?
LET'S FIND OUT.
Innnnn this corner! Weighing in at a stiff seventy pounds of NOGAWDNO! He's freshly packed in ice and sporting his bunny ears! He's chomping through souls, sanity, and your last row of Peeps! HE IS...
;)
FishyMcMurderFaaaaaaace!!
[waits for blood-curdling screams and "thuds" of people fainting to fade]
BUT WAIT.
A challenger appears!
In the other corner - no, uh, not that one, the one next to it - weighing in at 16 tons of fluff! He's ready to give a lickin', and good luck getting that image out of your brain ever!
He's bright pink and yellow, and his hair has never looked better! He IS lookin' at you! He'll follow you home, and refuse to take out the trash! HE IS...
;)
Slurpin' Gherkin, the Horror Muppet!!*
Thanks to Amy K. & Laura F. for the showdown of the century.
* It was either that or Splat Flaps Slither Tongue. Better? Worse?
*****
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Reader Comments (53)
I think the challenger is supposed to be Trump. It's a good likeness.
Is that second one meant to be trump?
It's quite a good likeness, cos he really couldn't look any scarier
I....wha.....jigga....uh....
The last one IS suppose to look like Trump, right? You know: the one who wants to be our next Commander in Peeps?
[screams]
::runs::
::cries softly to self in fetal position::
When Donald Trump went blond and others went blind.
The issue on the table: Does Smashed-up Marshmallow Peep Donald Trump (with the sickeningly realistic tongue) know more about foreign policy than Sorta Human Donald Trump (with no realistic anything)? Wreckies, you have the floor...
You have to admit; the Peeps mosaic is brilliant! And, the consistency of the marshmallow construction material accurately portrays the substance of the subject's policies.
That's one of the best Trump renditions ever.
I'm thinking that the sign on the seafood case is a bit of false advertising....
If they make orange Peeps, then that depiction of Donald Trump really missed its play for authenticity.
Disturbing. Horrifying. And yet, I can't look away.
Cake #1: What on God's Green Earth possessed them to do that?
Cake #2: Trump's real face?
They made a Donald Trump out of...Peeps? WHAT IS WRONG WITH THESE PEOPLE?!?
And what is that other thing supposed to be...?
Urp, excuse me... ;)
So, to whom shall I send my therapy bill? Because now that fish up top looks like potential VP material, and my fragile mind simply can't handle this.
Is it weird that the Peeps Trump is so easily recognizable? Or a compliment to the artiste? I can't decide.
Omg that mouth on the second one. THAT MOUTH.
Almost tossed my cookies. Pretty sure that slimy-looking mouth will be in my nghtmares for a while.
Gahhhhhhhhhh
All I can say is it's a good thing the Sunday Sweets are still on the front page. I just had to keep scrolling to calm both my eyeballs and my brain.
Does Trump have French fries for eyebrows? Also, WHY DOES IT HAVE A TONGUE? I pity the unfortunate person who has to eat it. Also, having to write that sentence is making me question what the world has come to. Peeps McFrybrows will haunt my dreams tonight. *cringes for the rest of my natural life*
Ok that first thing? That's the reason I don't go in the ocean. Because things like that live down in there. I'll stay on the beach, thanks.
Trump looks like he got a seriously heavy does of radiation. I'll be facing that in my nightmares tonight, I'm sure.
Gaaahhh! That first fish is horrifying! But the subject of the second one is scarier...
(That depiction, however, comes in just on the absurd side of brilliance, and made me laugh out loud. That awful tongue says it all...)
I thought that first picture said "I done the right thing" for a moment. :P
Fishy McMurderfaaaaaaace is either a smoked whole Ling-cod or a smoked whole Wolf Eel. And utterly horrifying either way.
The first "thing" has a sign underneath that says "We do seafood right!"
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! This is going to make me giggle all afternoon!
Can we just take the second one out to the grill and watch it melt? And burn, and go up in flames? And die slowly? PLEEEEZE?
Is that Trump or Elsa from Frozen?!
At what point in your life do you wake up and say, "I know what we're going to do today! We're going to make a likeness of Donald Trump out of Peeps!"
Even Phineas and Ferb would have balked at that! Hey, where's Perry? Did the moray eel monster get him?
I close my eyes and still see Slurpin' Gherkin. Shake my head with eyes closed; still there. 3 shots of tequila, took a nap and I CAN'T UNSEE THAT! ( My husband thinks I do horrible things to Peeps because I like to open the pkg and let them sit for a few days to develop a semi-chewy quality. Thank you for providing this illustration of truly evil treatment of Peeps) ( oh, and I didn't really have 3 shots of tequila before noon.)
The temptation to make a "dead unjugged rabbit fish" joke is overwhelming. I'm just not sure how many of you are familiar with that episode...
Cake 2: From the Police Blotter:
8:52 PM. We brought in Slurpin' Gherkin. He had been wanted for deliberately crashing into Farmer Cadberry’s Egg Stand and creaming all the eggs. He also injured a small chicken, bringing the additional charge of Hit and Runt. At first he wouldn’t talk. We couldn’t get a peep out of him. Then he laughed. This isn’t bunny, we told him. You’re going away fur a long time. Twenty years cooped up. And that time ain’t chicken feed. We continued to egg him on until he cracked. He was shell-shocked. The yolk was on him: he wasn’t so tough…inside he was just a marshmallow.
I want to un-see that!!!!! I think my trauma has trauma.
Your scariest post EVER.
I'm guessing that the first one escaped from a Coney Island sideshow display .
*gets up off the floor once the faintng spell has passed*
So that's why that ship is going to get such a name - Boaty McBoatface is going to be sent on a mission to bring in Fishy McMurderface! Godspeed, Boaty!
Huh. Donald Trump with better hair.
Annnd now I need therapy after viewing these umm, works of art. What in the world was the fish department thinking - hm...as if the mercury count in the fish isn't high enough, how else can I terrify customers? I l know, I will put a strip of peeps in the toothy grin of a eel and call it art! Yikes!!!
I agree with the other posters about the horror of the mouth on the second cake (there must be a way to make a Trumpet joke there), but what really weirds me out are the eyes. Those squinty evil little eyes are waaayyy too real looking.
Oh the inhumanity of it all.....making Peeps become a portrait of Donald J Trump.....it's just as bad as that commercial of Skittles made into a portrait of Steven Tyler.......sick, sick, sick.......My husband pointed out that the Peeps were the only way to plump out Trump's hair....hummmmmm.......just his observation............
I would vote for the subject of "cake" #2 as "Commander in Cheep"--as long as it's understood that that is an "honorary" title to placate his overinflated ego and convince him to stop his nonsense. "YeeeEEees, you *did* win a nice title, didn't you? Now let's go out in the yard and play with our toys..."
Then maybe 'Murica can get on with an actual Presidential election that isn't a complete farce. An absurd exercise in extremist viewpoints, perhaps, but not a *complete* farce.
What in the name of all that is good and holy is that tongue made of?
I admit, I didn't believe your Facebook post that it gets worse than ole Fishy McMurderface. I'l never doubt you again.
Shudder! That challenger is HORRIFYING!!!!!
Noooo now wreckerators have ruined Peeps lol. Well thank goodness no lambs looked scary this year. Phew on that one.
I'm with TLC. And it has more substance than the real thing.
@ThePhoenix: This is hilariously punny, and has me thinking of "our" mel, who always regaled us with the punniest funs every day! Sweet!!! =^~.~^=
[Editor's note- Your comments are coming through fine so you only need to post it once. Moderation is less frequent so sometimes it takes a few hours to see your comment, especially at 3am. -john (thoJ)]
@sendingtheclowns
I miss mel. He was like your funny wise grandpa & the Internet is a little less sparkly without him. Sigh....
I now have to recommend that you go check out the Peeps Contest on The Washington Post website. (I hope that coding worked, if not...Google is your friend)
@sendingtheclowns and @ SarahCVT : thank you for remembering and your kind words. mel is alive and well, a little older and a little slower…but rumor has it he may appear again now and then, like that mythical bird that rises from the ashes of the past…..
Hey Mel!
I was giving you a shout-out and high five before I even saw comments from @sendingtheclowns and @SarahCVT, or your response. Me an' dat bird go way back so I caught it in one (not to mention that you are inimitable) I believe I was seeing your crest and wing-tips through the remaining smoke wisps a few times before...
Love the way you got the commenters to address the obvious likeness of Peeps-man and make their social commentary without jeopardizing yourselves and risking becoming another tweet attack victim! :-)
The fish department's attempt to get into the spirit of the holiday certainly is creative! Reminds me a little of the fishmongers at one of the stands at Seattle's Pike Place Market. They routinely rig a stick and string to a scary-looking monkfish's mouth and make it move to freak out the tourists!
The Donald Trump Peeps creation was one of this year's entries in the Seventh Annual International PEEPS Art Exhibition held at the Racine (Wisconsin) Art Museum. It's really a wonderful event, with whimsical and fantastic artistic creations made from Peeps—but sadly this year, it's this one entry that has gotten all the attention. Check our some of the others here:
http://www.ramart.org/content/ram-7th-annual-international-peeps-art-exhibition
Ahhhhhhhhhhh!
...that is literally all I could type...
@dbc: Hello, and thanks for your gracious and encouraging post! And I appreciate your catching the pseudonym reference. It’s been a while, hasn’t it. Those were good times, lots of fun…perhaps an incomparable confluence of cakes, clever comedy commentary by the site’s creators, creative commenters and comments, maybe a once-in-a-lifetime experience…the Woodstock of Wreckies…?
mel