Tuesday
Dec062016
IT BEGINS
December 6, 2016 ♫ It's beginning to look a lot like ♪
;)
!!!
Ev'rywhere you go
Take a look at that blog by Jen
;)
It's pushing out wrecks again
With "candy canes"
;)
And snowman sprains, oh no!
;)
It's beginning to look a lot like
;)
!!!!
Balls on ev'ry tree
;)
But the wreckiest sight you'll find
;)
Are the Santas that "unwind"
;)
...and you can't un-see!
Thanks to Nancy D., Anony M., Laura R., Ginny V., Lisa E., Hannah P., Eleanore R., & Carla R. for the jollies.
*****
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Reader Comments (41)
Oh, gosh! I've been looking at this blog for years and (you would think I would know better) I never cease to be amazed at the different kinds of wrecks that are found. What IS that first one? Or rather, what is it SUPPOSED to be?
Oh my goodness, this really made me laugh out loud! This site has totally warped my mind to find everything looks like...body parts. Thank you! But really, how could anyone NOT see those? And that pink Santa...?????
Okay - are those reindeer, obscene looking mushrooms, deranged Whos, what are these underneath the "Snowman Sprains"?
What the HELL is that first one supposed to be? I can't even begin to fathom. But...yeah...those poinsettias sure make it more...Christmasy. Yeah.
Ah, The Spurting Peni of Christmas.
Can the Hanukkah Vajayjays be far behind?
Poor santa, to be defiled so badly :( :(
I'm so glad we have the "Happy Holidays" censor oval on the last Santa!
I think even the "war on xmas" folks will be glad to see that "Happy Holidays" plaque!
Those bugs with the curly antennae are adorable!
What? They're totally bugs.
wow. just wow
So. Much. Wrong. (WTH is up with that first cake???)
Yule logs?
@SuBee...We can honestly say that "Can the Hanukkah Vajayjays be far behind?" is one sentence no one has ever uttered. Nor the "spurting peni of Christmas" for that matter. BRAVO! Bring on the dancing Hanukkah Vajayjays wreckers! SuBee has a song just dying to be sung, I can feel it.
And we thought icing poo wangs were just for Thanksgiving and turkeys. O.O
For SuBee:
A Hanukkah Vajayjay;
I made it out of clay.
And when it's dry and ready
With Vajayjay I will play.
(I'll show myself out now...)
please pretty please do a "jingle balls, or Christmas balls" blog set to Jingle bells. so festive! :)
I think that I shall never see something as horrifying as testicles on a tree!
The Dr. Seuss-esque birds/reindeer were a nice touch, though.
I think that first one is a "Bumpy Cake". My daughter lived in Michigan and introduced us to this delicious thing. Its a creamy marshmallowy (but not marshmallow)cream under ganache. Its yummy. But the bumps are usually next to each other not spaced like this one.
#1 Oh, that. That's one of those er, um, you know... Moving right along...
#2 I don't believe this one wound up in this slot by accident for one jillionth of a second.
#3 I *think* those are cinnamon rolls -- coated with industrial quantities of frosting. Why? WHY?!
#4 In the 2016 remake of the children's classic ('cause everything needs to be remade now and then to keep it 'new' and 'fresh'), Frosty visits the chiropractor. Right NOW.
#5 On the other side of the Sun, there is a planet *covered* in pine trees. It is always sunny there, so the planet was of course named...Pine-Sol. These creatures are the dominant non-tree life form. Their unfortunate resemblance to a particular appendage led to them being called 'spurting peni', probably because 'd_ckhead' was already taken. (Hi, kids!)
#6 You didn't think pine trees reproduced by cones, did you?
#7 Another tragic bariatric decoration 'decompression anomaly'. Kind of like that scene from that movie where people went to Mars and one of them lost his helmet or something, and his eyes bugged out and stuff. But without spacesuits and Mars. Oh, and one of the astronauts would have to be Santa, which wouldn't make any sense at all, because there are no kids there. Yet.
#8 Yes, kids, it's Santa, staring in that holiday PSA, 'Saint Nick Does His Three Esses." Since he doesn't shave his face, he decided to shave everywhere else. Or so we presume. We can't really tell, because of that artfully placed bit of flotsam. Believe me, I don't want to know. [Now where did I leave that Unsee Machine?]
I'm thinkin' eclairs under chocolate glaze on the first cake. Yeah....that's the ticket.
But why????
Yes, those are obviously some sort of mushroom-quail. Their heads are too large for that other interpretation.
I believe I'll file that first cake under "Yule 'logs'"...
Those are three French hens peeking out of the grass. You know, as in "four calling birds, three French hens, two turtle doves, ...". Yes, I'm sure of it. Please let me be right.
Just when I thought I'd seen everything at Cake Wrecks, y'all surprise me with nekkid Santa. Oy!!!
I sort of like the little phallic mushroom reindeer. But even though I'm a chocoholic I'm not touching that first cake.
#1 is bumpy cake with huge "bumps"! I live in Michigan where Sanders created the bumpy cake. They are super delicious, though the bumps are usually smaller.
That "candy cane" looks more like pokéballs to me.
Oh man just when I thought they couldn't make these any worse here come the poo deer lol. And what they did to Santa should earn them all enough coal to keep warm for years to come lol.
I thought the FDA got rid of the pink slime...
I guess they deemed it okay for cakes?
Does anyone actually buy and ...hold it, EAT any of these? Or is that a daft question?
Oh my gosh. Seriously, I think these are some of the worst wrecks ever, but that last one... did they not think he looks like he's nude? Did this not occur to ANYONE'S brains there? And worse..... There are MORE in the background!
Thank goodness for strategically placed Happy Holidays stickers! 0.o
OMG, Naked Santa! - What's all the white stuff on your belly, Naked Santa? XD
I thought the first cake might be a leftover Thanksgiving cake covered in ganache and xmas'd up.... LOL!
Is it bad that I want to see the back of that last cake?
Those three rein, quail, mushroom things with the antler tuft curls on their 'heads". I Love Those. I Love That Cake. I love it.
The snowman kind of looks like he's taking a bubble bath. Or has really bad gas. Either way, no wonder he's about to fall over from melting.
The first one is chocolate-meringue-wang, a traditional holiday treat wherever wangs are wafted in the name of joy and goodwill.
Does anyone else love Boob-face Santa? (2nd last). Rosy cheeks indeed :)
Goodbye poo wang turkeys, hello poo wang reindeer. It's the holiday season...
I can't believe you actually come up with a song for this one! And a really good one! Along with the really bad cakes. It makes it even more special. Thank you for sharing your talent!
Seriously? No one else has ever seen the hybrid turkeys with antlers?