July Wrecks Forth
June 30, 2015 "Ok, staff, July 4th is coming and we need new cake designs. I'm talking stuff that screams, 'AMERICA.'" [pointing] "Jackie, GO."
"Uh... butterflies?"
;)
"I like it. Pat?"
"Maybe a gator-lookin' thing?"
;)
"Smart thinking; we'll ride the dinosaur craze. Gail?"
"Um. Poo cupcakes?"
"We already make those, Gail."
"... with red, white, and blue sprinkles?"
;)
"PERFECT.
"Wesley, my man! Give me something sexy."
"Ok, you're going to love this. Picture, if you will..." [jazz hands] "...FLOPPY WANG."
;)
"Ooooh, EDGY.
"But just to be safe, you better stick to your burning trashcans."
;)
"I told you, they're not..."
[Everyone all together] "Shut up, Wesley."
"Now, Sally, baby! Whaddaya got that screams 'AMERICA'?"
;)
"It's like you're the only one who gets me, Sally."
Thanks to Anna S., Cassidy T., Madison W., D.E., Emma D., & Caroline and Elyse for the thumbs up.
*****
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Reader Comments (28)
YUM! That second one looks like it's ALL ICING... and more than that, it's ALL MINE!!!
[jazz hands] gets me ever time
And *Kermit Flail* that gets me too
Jen, bless these flag themed cakes
Pooh cupcakes, too
Alligators
Aren’t for haters
Of the nation which we love to love
Patriotic
Not psychotic
Butterfly is not a drone
Jen, bless this garbage can
Amer’ca’s own
Jen, bless that floppy wang
Amer’ca’s own
On cake#3......"fweeeeeeeeet" (clearing throat)......♪ "I'm a Yankee Doo-Doo Dandy, A Yankee Doo Doo Dandy Am I-I-I-I... 💩💩💩💩💩💩"♪♪
I salute the bad cakes that died so the other cakes could be free
Just make sure you don't put too many of these valuable sprinkles on those poo cupcakes. Six or eight per poo pile should do it.
SHUT UP WESLEY!
I know what "Thumb-Up Sally" (from the bakery department she's working at right now) is thinking...Look at her! She's sending the sly message "Oh, don't worry..This one isn't from HERE! I smuggled it in from a place across town to take to our staff meeting, so the boss will THINK we make them this well. Good thinking, huh?"
=^~.~^=
Undigested medications?
Nothing-NOT ONE THING-says freedom in the Americas for all people who dream of world peace because WE'RE#1!* like sprinkles on poocakes. Oh bakerecker, i salute you!
*authentic frontier gibberish
Actually, I think the gator-lookin’ thing is marvelous. Doesn’t look very edible, however.
What does a reptile have to do with Independence Day anyway?
To me the "floppy wang" one looks like a boomerang.
Hilarious! Poor Wesley.
I don't think that the last cake is a wreck. That's a success, in a certain way.
I like how they actually write the words 'fire cracker' on that cookie. That means they KNOW it doesn't look right! LOL
The reptile cake is clearly a riff on the chopped-up-snake 'don't tread on me' flag. An extreme riff.
They spelt America right. Probably only because it was a stencil, though.
I literally LOL'd at SHUT UP WESLEY!
So, what the heck is floppy wang really supposed to be? A mutant jellyfish? A boomerang?A tea towel?
If it is really a floppy wang, the owner needs to see a doctor, stat. That thing is seriously diseased.
Not cake but absolutely on trend...
http://www.buzzfeed.com/christinebyrne/potatriotism#.vukXM8Njw
CCC #1. Creator must have been a Rolling Stones fan. 'Cuz that's "Jumping Jack Flag". Insert groan here.
And THANK YOU Bigg3469, I now have that song stuck in my head. Doo Doo lyrics not the real ones. Oh and also thank you for making me almost spit coffee onto my keyboard. LOL
Yewww! So much icing on these cakes my teeth hurt!!
I think the "floppy wang" is actually supposed to be that fire cracker motif where the cracker is broken in half, with the Bang! coming out of the middle. 'Cept they forgot that part, thus you get floppy wang instead.
I'm not sure the "alligator" can be called a cake wreck as it does not appear to contain any actual cake. Can you have an icing wreck?? Sally's cake is actually good considering the others and the usual cakes featured here.
The world needs more "shut up, Wesley", if only to make me almost drop my phone more often. :-D
But, I just can't get over that last one! It looks like a stencil, but somehow, they still misspelled it! I mean, I get putting an "e" in place of the "u", but who puts an "A" in front of MURICA!!!
Wow the floppy wang has me in tears of laughter lol. And the flaming trash can too. Shesh at least they haven't done a cake full of firecrackers shaped like wangs.. yet. I have a feeling those will be here soon lol.
That last cake is actually kind of subtle and pretty in a low-key way. The softer colors look good, especially next to all those brightly colored wrecks. I'd buy that one.