Kids These Days

Education can never start too early. Which is why I, for one, am happy to see all the things kids are learning from their birthday cakes. You know, things like....
...friendly hand gestures:
And where Spider-Man's web comes from:
Watch it go!
Then there are the helpful anatomy lessons:
I think it's safe to say that Bailey really, REALLY enjoyed his Bar Mitzvah party.
Not to mention the legal drinking age:
Hint: that's not it.
And perhaps the best life lesson of all: one of the hazards of mixing boobs with beer:
Thanks to Sarah G., Anony M., Tanya G., M.M., and Jenae B. for the education.
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Reader Comments (22)
Sad part, most are well done, but seem to be in bad taste....
Barney is a dinosaur
And on your cake he'll linger
Piss him off and you'll be sad
'Cause he'll give you the finger
Barneys friends are big and small
Some slender, some are wider
Due to having an encounter with a manly spider
Barney knows teen years are tough
He's here to make them easy
Bailey took this lit'rally
And now she's feeling queasy
Barney teaches through tough love
Don't you dare ignore him
He'll get pissed and flip you off
Your future will be quite grim
These days, Bailey's probably a girl, but it's still wildly inappropriate. Unless it's a Leap Year birthday, making him/her 52.
Well, in Barney's ( maker's) defense, hands are difficult to draw and then there's the fact that his are dinosaur hands so maybe an itsy-bitsy pass on that. Spider-Man's web is unfortunately located but, having never cast a web myself, perhaps it occasionally does go places it shouldn't. And that is a nice cake. Now the others: who is paying for these exhibits of WRONG? Except for the Bud Light (patooie!) cake, these weren't $10.99 cakes off the rack. Wow! Maybe a naughty auntie? A ex-con uncle? Less worse, smart-mouthed school friends? Please don't let it be mom and dad thinking this is cute or funny Orin any way appropriate.
Given all that, your commentary is pretty funny, Jen!
I, too, believe Bailey is a girl. This cake just is giving her hope for the future....comes with pack of straining bras.
Cake #3 - Are those...areolas?
I also think Bailey is a girl because I know two such and none who are boys. That is a very tacky cake to give a 13 year-old.
I am ridiculously curious about some of these cakes' back stories.
Spider-Man's posture suggests extreme constipation, which just makes the web more disturbing
@Miss Paper: LOL! "Straining" bras? SO glad I skipped that experience.
No collapsed cake parts? Check
"Birthday" spelled right? Check
Characters modeled correctly? Check
Balloons look like balloons? Check
Okay, why don't we ever get any reorders?
Oh, PUH-LEEEZ find out the back stories on these cakes!
On cake #3 it sure looks like someone went to the trouble to make areolas, and nipples too. 8-/ I'm guessing that Bailey didn't get a "becoming a teenager" celebration-maybe there was a tragedy in her family at the time? So her friends decided to throw her one for her 23rd birthday. Yeah, I'm going with that back story, because otherwise it would be unbelievable that her parents would pay for such a cake!
Just. So. Much. Wrong.
The scary part is that the last three cakes aren't the decorators' fault. Someone deliberately ordered a Bud Light cake for 16 year old, and regardless if Bailey is male or female, giant bazoogas aren't really appropriate for a 13 year old. The 17 year old might not be too happy about a pregnant cake either. These cakes must be ordered by the same people who decorate wedding cakes with beer cans and dead squirrels.
Maybe the 13-year-old asked for a boob job for her birthday???? I sure hope the 17 year old cake is a joke in bad taste!
So I too thought Bailey was a 13 year old girl who got a boob job for her birthday. Sadly, it happens. But, why the nipples? There's apparently nowhere to draw the line. I bet the 17th Birthday cake was also for the same Bailey. Ya know, because of the boob job at 13.
Wow nice 17 year old pregnancy cake lol. Most of these make me wonder if the wreckerator was drunk or the baker.
I'm hoping Bailey is 30, not 13, and the baker misheard.
I only know female Baileys. Tho I'm also aware of a Bayleigh. Again, female!
In defense of the beer cake, 16 is the legal drinking age in a lot of countries.
To be fair, the bakers made what the ppl ordered...