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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Friday
Aug012014

My Spidey Senses Are Tingling

It's Spider-Man Day!

RAISE THE ROOF!!

Er, with your hands, Spidey. Your hands.

 

For the past 300 years* Spider-Man has faced off against the deadliest of da foes: Doc Oc, Venom, Willem...

[*Thanks, Wikipedia!]

 

...but today Spider-Man faces his most formidable enemies yet:

BAKERS.

 

Don't give up, Spider-Man! We've got your back!

No sprinkles can hold you!

 

You CAN make it across that cake!

Or... not.

 

Try using your special web-slinging skills!

Um.
This is a little awkward.

[insert "Peter Parker" joke here]

 

Well, happy birth/anniversary/first day of publication anyway, Spider-Man. Here's to many, MANY more years of...

o.0

 

Thanks to Stephanie M., Tobi W., Donald L., Suzanne S., Dave W., & Emily F. for the web of tries.

*****

Thank you for using our Amazon links to shop! USA, UK, Canada.

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Reader Comments (32)

Wreckerman, Wreckerman
Tries to do what a baker can
Makes a cake to delight
Tries so hard, but it’s not right
Look out here comes the Wreckerman

In chill of night,
Piping bag in his hand
Turns a basketball
Into a Spiderman

Wreckerman, Wreckerman
Makes a flexible Spiderman
Yoga moves-really sick
Spins a web from his dick

Oh he’s trying to do his best here
Doesn’t mean to offend, dear
He is a Wreckerman

August 1, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterSuBee

Lounging Spider-Man
needs giant polar bear rug.
Yeah, bebeh, work it.

August 1, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterHaiku Joy

I really like what they did with the Spidey who's lying sprawled on the third cake. Sprinkles are just SO much classier than your run-of-the-mill chalk line. Rest in pieces, man. =^-.-^=

August 1, 2014 | Unregistered Commentersendingtheclowns

Confusing my butt
for my hands is how I failed
first grade penmanship.

August 1, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterHaiku Joy

Number two is really not all that bad, folks. A lot of bakers would kill to have such even lines meeting like that.

August 1, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterNancy

My 3 1/2 year old son spotted Spiderman and asked if the 4th cake was a Spiderman lobster- that's when I lost it!

August 1, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterLisa

Dear Bakers,

You said you could do it,
But you could not….
These cakes are best summed up
By Sir Walter Scott:
“Oh what a tangled web we weave,
When first we practise to deceive!”

August 1, 2014 | Unregistered Commentermel

Wow, who knew his spidey sense actually tingles in his butt?

Spider Man, Spider Man,
Who can screw you up? A baker can!

August 1, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterJodi

@HaikuJoy -- LOL!!! Thanks for the chuckles this morning!

August 1, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterMaureen

I lost it at Willem Dafoe.

August 1, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterFluffy Cow

Is it just me, or does the first Spider-Man look like he's trying to twerk?

August 1, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterArcticFoxPup

The last one looks more like Strongbad to me....Which, if there are any other Strongbad fans, did you see they are starting that up again?

August 1, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterCrissyanna

I do not think those people have ever seen spider man... suebee and haiku joy bahahahaha

August 1, 2014 | Unregistered Commentermindy1

Hey guys, we went to Devil's Tower yesterday, and there were these bright lights in the sky, and I woke up at home in Colorado. That's normal, right? Hey, at least the Wi-Fi works...

Sung to "Goldfinger"

Webslinger (mwa, wa wa)
He's the man, the man who just loves to twerk
That's Spidey's quirk
He's a red zinger
Reckon you should dump some more sprinkles in
You can't hold him!

Watch him glide 'cross the cake with no fear
I'm afraid it might take him a year
Does the birthday girl know that he's dissed her?
It's the crotch of death from Mister... Webslinger
Party guests, take care, though his flotsam's bold
It's from a mold!

And flotsam gets old
I'm not sold!

August 1, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterSharyn

@HaikuJoy GMTA!!! My first thought was that the Spidey "back" cake looked like the back side of a Macho Man cake!! 😄😃😁😊

August 1, 2014 | Unregistered Commenteranony mouse

Look out, here comes Spider Man.....ew, dirty boy!

August 1, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterCaroline B

Number four is Stumperman, Spiderman's differently abled cousin, slinging from the elbows.

August 1, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterZeldabird

This is the best birthday post ever! Willem Dafoe, Strongbad, and even the one with him dragging himself across the cake on his face reminds me of Piderman
http://youtu.be/G18jhC3b53A
Thank you for the laughs!!
And kudos to Subee, Sharyn and HaikuJoy! Well done!

August 1, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterBelovedmolly

@ Sharyn: LOL! Were you planning on leaving so suddenly, or did someone/something want you somewhere else...? (I'm torn between playing the Twilight Zone music and the theme song to "Close Encounters of the Third Layer"...) Anyway, welcome home! =^~.~^=

August 1, 2014 | Unregistered Commentersendingtheclowns

RE: the last cake: Did he eat the cake - is he still alive? Yes, I just can't figure it out - I told that baker to put lots of venom in his cake! ba-dum-bump! I'll be here ALL week folks! ;-)

August 1, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterJen @ Cup a Dee Cakes

1nd ~ @ArcticFoxPup ~ Twerking Spiderman *snort*
2rd ~ Maybe they're trying to get around the copyright laws???
3th ~ It looks like they tried to cover the plastic piece with sprinkles. Now it looks like spider poop O.O Yep, takes your mind right off the fact that half the cake is covered with plastic doesn't it? You're welcome!
4st ~ Looks like Spidey put on a little weight. It's okay, it happens to the best of us.
5nd ~ @SuBee ~ You made me snort in the most unprofessional manner. You're seriously awesome! @Hiaku Joy ~ Maybe that confusion is why so many kids today don't know how to spell?
6rd ~ Mister Man there has some pretty gnarly acne. They even have faces! O.O

August 1, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterJodee

That last cake looks a lot like Deadpool instead of Spider-man. Maybe he's breaking the fourth wall again!

August 1, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterIsolder74

The fourth cake, the one for Will, is that fondant on the buildings around the edge or slices of pasturized processed cheese product? Hey, it's Cake Wrecks. You've got to wonder.

Oh, I get it. It's a cheese cake.

August 1, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterTricia L

Oh @HaikuJoy, that is awwwwwesommmmme! I also looked at Sprinkles Spidey and thought "Hey, Bebeh!"

August 1, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterAngelaS

I believe the second cake is Spidey's answer to Superman's Fortress of Solitude — the little-known

WEB-DOME OF ISOLATION

Lacking Superman's resources (and ability to go thousands of miles out of town for just a few hours), Spiderman slings a dome-shaped web on which he sticks his favorite red blanket. He then crawls under it, where there is plenty of room for him… to curl up in the fetal position.

August 1, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterJane

On the 5th cake, Spiderman has simply developed anatomically correct spinnerets.
"Look Aunt May! No hands!"

August 1, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterMudmusher

Oh man. Poor Spidey he can't survive what wreckerators have done to him lol. Especially when his web comes from somewhere south of the border lol. Oh I cannot stop the laughter and tears.

August 2, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterArlene

The first one is twerking upside down? No?

August 2, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterSQ

Spinnerets! That's the word! Sounds so much better than shooting webs out of your ass.
Lisa's little son probably knew this..he's got a future as an arachn- an invertebr- um, a biologist. He knows lobsters and spiders are cousins. Sort of. I don't know.
Comments all hilarious.... Sharyn, i'm adopting your mwa, wa wa...with your permission, of course....

August 2, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterBlondie's Mom

So funny. You know, now when I put 3nd or 2st into an email or text NOBODY gets it....except my CW family!

August 2, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterVaBeach alemaP

Oh my goodness!!

5th cake = porn???

I bet his Spidey-senses are tingling!!

August 4, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterRuthie

I see no problem with that first one. He's just doing Spider-Woman's pose:
http://eschergirls.tumblr.com/post/95300389080/this-is-an-alternate-cover-of-spider-woman-1-the

September 5, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterRae M

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