Tuesday
Oct072014
Now Tell Him About The Twinkie
October 7, 2014 As many of you know, I am a HUGE Ghostbusters fan, so when Krispy Kreme announced their new donuts this month, I was filled not with the promise of marshmallow fluff filling, but with dread:
;)
I've just seen too much, you guys. The pastry never matches the promo pic.
And sure enough:
;)
"Mother pus bucket...!"
"You're right; no human being would decorate donuts like this."
Thanks to Hal C. over on the Ghostbusters Fans page, and also to Susie F., who'd like to remind us that Dunkin' Donuts really isn't doing any better:
;)
"Ok, who brought the dog?"
*****
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Reader Comments (68)
“I collect spores, molds, and fungus.”
Wow, here in Japan the donuts you get look exactly like the pictures. The Halloween ones we got last year were really cool, should check out what they've got in stock now! They also had some great Peanuts themed ones.
Uuurhhh... I feel so funky...
Oh, look! One in the upper right corner almost…almost… nah!
Wow, that ghost(?) on the lower left...it's the V for Vendetta donut!
Oh, this makes me extra sad. The only thing better than donuts (that is, fried pastry with icing that we justify as "breakfast" instead of dessert!) is festive, holiday donuts (bonus if there are sprinkles). This is just wrong.
Actually, it's more of a guideline than a rule....
Do these people work with their eyes closed?
My favorite part about it is how they get progressively worse as you go from the top of the box to the bottom. It's like they were kind of trying at first, and then they were like "Screw it, I'm not doing this for minimum wage." But at least they got the parts kind of in the right place. I'm not so sure what the Dunkin' folks were going for--a Picasso perhaps?
Lament For A Donut Fail
O, Krispy Kreme, that ‘tis a crime
That you cannot e’en make good slime
To put upon your little cakes.
What e’er the matter,
For goodness sakes?
Was dear Venkman slimed for naught?
The visceral image could not be caught
Upon your little rings of dough?
Ectoplasm you cannot show?
It looks, alas, like diarrhea.
Green globs, KK, are no panacea
For carefully piping the real thing.
Thank all you didn’t try the ghost and ring.
And lest you give yourself a hand,
What fate befell the Stay Puft man?
You clearly are no Paul Cézanne,
But is this work the best you can?
O, weep, O, weep for the Marshmallow Man.
When you frost, we all abhor,
Best make plain donuts in your store,
And as for Ghostbusters,
Nevermore….
I know, I know~they don't even seem to be trying, but honestly! Maybe some of these places only pay minimum wage, which could be a lot harder to swallow than the doughnuts. They're possibly being made to work as quickly as possible, too. What do people expect-- Picasso? =^o.o0^= (Oops, hold on; that was not the example I was looking for--) What do people expect? Michelangelo? =^-.-^=
This job is definitely NOT worth eleven-five a year!
I aint afraid of no... Never mind, these are scary.
I think they need to ask their decorators “Have you or any member of your family ever been diagnosed schizophrenic or mentally incompetent?”
@mel, O weep, O, weep for the Marshmallow Man. Does it count that when I read that line I laughed so hard tears started to roll down my cheeks?
Just like McDonalds, the product NEVER matches the picture above the counter.
FINALLY! Someone else who knows (and uses) "Mother Puss Bucket"! I have found my people
Those poor donuts are screaming: "He slime me!"
There is no Donut, only Zuul!
Is it too warm for the brie?
@Sandy, I think they need to ask corporate "Have you ever worked on the front line when the donuts come off the line? Do you honestly think we have time to hand-decorate every stinking donut with perfect designs? Not gonna happen, man."
Bravo mel, bravo!
Well at least I don't feel so bad now that Krispy Kreme in the UK doesn't have these Ghostbusters doughnuts!
@Sandy: not only does it count, I think it qualifies for bonus points....thanks for laughing!
@Rachel CrazyMum: thank you....'Twas a sad, sad thing to write...but I think the pictures explain why Krispy Kreme folded in this area....
Hmm, if I went to work for them for two weeks, made extraordinary proper designs, then quit - would I get tons of new customers for a home cake decorating business? Even without training?
These 'creations' are scarier than the movie or Halloween ever meant to be.
Mother pus bucket! Hee hee hee, you read Kim Harrison!
OMG...so bad. I used to decorate donuts in a donut store, and it really isn't that hard....those bakers put in absolutely NO effort.
Wait. What? Did you talk to the Krispy Kreme people about this? BAHAHAHAHAHAHA
I am excited about the "mother pus bucket" curse as well! Hollows fans are cool, and Al is my favorite bad guy.
You quoted Al! I'm way too happy about that right now. Also, that pumpkin one is scary in all the wrong ways.
I just bought the Halloween doughnuts from Krispy Kreme on Oct. 3 and they looked exactly like the promo pictures. I ate them before I had time to take a picture though because...you know...Krispy Kreme doughnuts.
You can almost see the order in which the baker started... It was like "Yeah, gotta make these as the picture"... and VERY QUICKLY went all "F THIS" and didn't even try for the last one xD
Of course, those donuts are clearly NOT from Krispy Kreme, which kinda kneecaps the entire argument.
What did you DO Ray?
Loving the Hollows reference. I think it is time that chains stop asking their stores to do certain promotions and just ask the bakers to make a couple things and put them out if they can reproduce them.
Alrightalrightalright, woah woah wooooah!
Nice shootin', Tex!
I don't know, Mel, the green one does look a bit like Cezanne's Chateau Noir.
Mother Pus Bucket! Ha! Those were rather demonic looking donuts.
Bahahahahaha
Over on imgur, they've got an even worse Dunkin Donuts attempt.
@mel ~ "O, weep, O, weep for the Marshmallow Man." is going to be framed and put on my wall. I less than 3 you in the most unstalkerish way.
We no longer have Krispy Kreme here either. If those terrifyingly horribly wrecked doughnuts up there were available locally, I'd still eat 'em. Because...Krispy Kreme!
@mel - *standing ovation* Marvelous!
The place in DC is actually doing a nice job. They weren't complete carbon copies, but they definitely looked correct. I was pleasantly surprised I didn't have to tweet you a photo!
Is this for real? If I went in to buy the real Ghostbusters donuts and they looked like this in the case, I would walk out or buy another stuffed or frosted donut. Why buy something unattractive.
"Mother pus bucket" has been my favorite curse since, well, since I saw Ghostbusters and then figured out what cussing was. So, quite a while.
"Mother puss bucket" is from Ghost Busters. Not Hollows.
Yes, it's true. This baker has no talent.
Someone blows their nose and you want to keep it?
To A Donut, Upon Opening The Box From Krispy Kreme
Wee, sugary, flour'd, dec'rous goodie,
O, what a fate ha' come upon thee!
Tha' planned a countenance so grand,
Wi' cap o' sailor!
Didst wreckorator then aband'n
Hi' piping gun for nailer?
I'm truly sorry those lazy bakers
Feel that making art takes acres
O' sugar'd icing color'd green;
An' faces gang agley.
Things more horrid could have been.
(Tie-ins to Judgment Day?)
I doubt me th' donut-makers care,
But what then? Poor buyer, beware!
Images in adverts and promos,
May no' be wha' ye get!
And surely only fools and schlomos
Shall broadcast lost regret!
My children's hopes were sorely dashed,
And spir'ts soaring, quickly crashed,
Gazing on this artistic nadir.
'S a sma' request;
'F ye cannae match the picture,
At least try yer best!
Damn. That marshmallow face looked so cute....and like he wouldn't be hard to draw.
Stupid deceptive donuts.
@Tricia L, it's just a quote from the Ghost Busters movie. Didn't intend to offend anyone who actually works at Krispy Kreme. Sorry.