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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Thursday
Jan262012

It's a Double Down!

Hey H.T., is "double down" actually a football thing? Or am I thinking of that KFC sandwich again?

Mmmmm. KFC. Maybe with some biscuits and honey, and that minced coleslaw that's really sweet? Aw yeah. That's the stuff.

Oh, and I think those cakes are misspelled or whatever.

Now, SOMEONE GET ME SOME CHICKEN. The Pentaverate demands it.

« BULL'S-EYE! | Main | Wreck A "Bye," Baby »

Reader Comments (62)

Are you ready for some Foobtall?

January 26, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterKathryn

Is dyslexia actually a job requirement? I'm starting to wonder.

January 26, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterliz

Well, it's a well known fact, Sonny Jim, that there's a secret society of the five wealthiest people in the world, known as The Pentavirate, who run everything in the world, including the newspapers, and meet tri-annually at a secret country mansion in Colorado, known as The Meadows.

January 26, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterAmy

OMG! It's the insane field design too! WHY IS THE 50 YARD LINE RUNNING THE WRONG WAY!!!!
These things are EVERYWHERE Stop the madness, people!!

January 26, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterFluffy Cow

"He puts an addictive chemical in his chicken that makes you crave it fortnightly!" LOL.

January 26, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterA.J.

Are they implying football fans can't spell (or is it code?)

January 26, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterSuBee

These are cakes for the Ridince World Cup. (Which explains yesterday's cake...) Ridince is a ground game played in the Wizarding World. While exciting, it never gained the popularity of Quidditch, perhaps because there's no chance someone will fall off a broom and plummet to earth. This year, the Gaints and the Patroits will play for glory. How can you tell it's a Ridince game/cake? Because the lines are painted diagon-ally.

January 26, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterSharyn

It's a shame the Ravens lost the Playoff. I'd LOVE to see how somebody could mess up that name. Do they not teach spelling in schools any more?

January 26, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterLady Anne

Oh, man.... Come ON, Wreckorators, follow the advice of your second grade teachers (which may be the last yeat completed?) - Sound. It. Out.

Pay-tree-ots.

Ji-ants.

No, wait. That won't work, either. Ummmmm..... And we've already seen what you can do with "Super Bowel", so forget that.

How about some "Football"???

[sigh]

I give up. As you were. Carry on!

From the hometown of the better team....

2 for 2 right next to each other? That's pathetic! I'd buy those just to bring to the super bowl party and make people laugh!

January 26, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterLaura P.

I had a friend who worked at KFC in high school. Once she told me exactly how much sugar they use when making that coleslaw that's so sweet. Let's just say that you might as well have cake.

January 26, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterRose Campion

The Gaints are going to kick the Patroits sas!

January 26, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterNYer in Beantown

@NYer in beantown bwahahaha @the cakes WTF

January 26, 2012 | Unregistered Commentermindy1

@ Merry from Annie's Book Stop
Are you in New Jersey??

January 26, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterSuBee

God, I forgot how much I love that movie. Harriette, sweet Harriette ,hard-hearted harbinger of haggis.Beautiful, bemuse-ed, bellicose butcher. Un- trust... ing. Un-know... ing. Un-love... ed? Freaking fantastic.

Head! Move!

We have a piper down!

I could go on and on...

Oh and the cakes are wonderfully wrong to...

January 26, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterDana

I really have nothing to say to football, except that any game played with a leather egg should be more amusing. Really, football makes as much sense to me as this haiku:

When beaks are rhombi,
We clog his krispie nostrils.
But hey, nice balloons.

In other non-related news, today's Word of the Day for my students: Komodo dragon. (Other Words so far this semester have been knoll, Kurd, knurl, kvass, kinetic, knobkerrie, klipspringer, and knight errant.)

January 26, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterHaiku Joy

Obviously the second wreckorator really wanted the SAINTS to be in the Super Bowl and so got a little confused.

January 26, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterAthene

"Oops! I misspelled that! I don't want to redo it, but the fans will think I'm biased. What do do? What to do? I know! I'll misspell the other team name! Then it'll be even! Great thinking! Yeah"

January 26, 2012 | Unregistered Commentermiriam

Well, Ii have to admit that about sums up how I feel about the Supper Bowel.

January 26, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterMumsykat

Oh when the Gaints
or Patroits win
Oh when the Gaints or Patroits win
We'll have gobs and gobs of frosting
When the Gaints or Patroits win.

January 26, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterNaomi

A baker has anticipated the upcoming mergers in the NFL.
The Detroit Lions are going to join the Patriots, making a new team called the Patroits.
At the same time, the Saints and the Giants will fuse into the Gaints.

Either that, or somebody's dyslexic.

January 26, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterGary

Guess they got confused with the whole "I before E except after C" thing....oi
wreckerator: "Oh heck with it, I goes after every vowel!"

January 26, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterLoo-E Loo-I

Oh, that makes me sad..... it reminds me that our beloved Saints aren't in the Super Bowl! Came close, but didn't make it.
Maybe the cake maker confused the Giants with the Saints!

January 26, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterAndrea

Obviously, they are trying to avoid the copyright infringement thing. Way to be proactive, bakers!

January 26, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterMaryM

Oi. The wreckorators have obvouisly been hit too mainy times in the head with footbails.

January 26, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterMimiheart

SuBee.... NOT in NJ.... Thank goodness. The "Patroits" play here in Beautiful Scenic Foxboro, where on every game day the stands fill with more people than live in the entire town.

And the hype continues to build.... Need anything from the Patriots Pro Shop? My son will be making a run across town soon!

(Incidentally, I hereby apologize to one and all for my own typo above... "year", nit "yeat", darn it!

Okay, I haven't been to KFC in quite a while, since my kids have food allergies and everything they have in that place is off limits to them--but now I'm craving their chicken! (and coleslaw, and biscuits with honey...)

Once (before kids) my husband and I went there for a late supper, near closing time, and to our shock, the clerk said "we're out of chicken". WHAT? This restaurant is a CHICKEN place! Well, they had pizza, and chicken pot pie, and a boat-load of wings (all of which they gave to my husband, since that's all they had...) Crazy! I guess restaurants can be wrecks too!

January 26, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterTwinMom

I can't believe you don't know that grammar rule:

i before o and a except in football

gessh - the state of American education (not educatoin because that isn't a football team!)

January 26, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterHeather

The Gaints/Giants cake IS in Saints colors... better check the sell by date on that one.

January 26, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterGooch

I have to wonder if they purposely did this to try their best to get on CakeWrecks. I mean, can one person be that stupid? Oh, they can? Oh.

January 26, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterAngie

Does KFC still have the Double Down, or did the Food Police put a stop to it. And when did they start selling pizza?

January 26, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterCraig

I love love love LOVE that you quote So I married an Axe Murderer, I Love that movie!

January 26, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterSarah

I LOVE that you referenced that movie! Every once in a while I'll randomly say, "Because he puts an addictive chemical in his chicken that makes you crave it fortnightly, SMART***!" and nobody else gets it and I walk away ashamed. :)

January 26, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterBarb

@ Fluffy Cow: I hadn't noticed the 50 yard line, but you're right! And it's clearly an edible image, which means they'd be wrecks even if the names were spelled correctly. Probably not as funny, and way harder for those of us who don't follow sports to get, but still a wreck.

January 26, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterMarnie

When people can't even spell the names of FOOTBALL teams, that's when you know the educational system is not doing what it should.

January 26, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterBetty

*headdesk* and I don't even follow football.

Yikes. Maybe each cake is for the fans of the opposing team??

January 26, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterDi

Yum! I don't follow football but I'll have a piece of each cake! A corner piece please. :-d

January 26, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterSunshine Mary

These wrecks have inspired me to break out my favorite sentence: "The kafuffle engendered a hullabaloo among the hoi polloi."

January 26, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterstaying anon.

Dear TwinMom,

Once, in Japan about 20 years ago, I went to a Burger King that had run out of hamburger buns. They refused to sell bunless hamburgers, so the only options were French fries and chicken nuggets. We thought it was hilarious. The manager thought otherwise.

January 26, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterHaiku Joy

At least that's an equal-opportunity Wreck: both team names are misspelled.

Gee, you'd think there are words that just CAN'T be misspelled ... really easy words ... but I guess you'd be wrong.

January 26, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterJules

@Sharyn - Nice! I had the "ba-da-bum" in my head at the end. :-)

As for these cakes...all I can say is "WO(e)-man" indeed. (Sorry, my attempts to incorporate a movie line always sounds much better in my head).

Apparently, lots of things are in my head. Hmmm....never mind...

Carry on.

January 26, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterlisadh524

Hey!! Atleast the "Detriot Loins" aren't playing.....LOL

January 26, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterangi

Perfect for my Supper Bowel Partie!!!

January 26, 2012 | Unregistered Commentertallwoman

Well, obviously these were done in Louisiana.... As has already been pointed out, "Gaints" is really "Saints", and "Patroits" is just someone trying to make it sound all French! :)

January 26, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterJeneric

Funny... I DO crave their chicken fortnightly...

LOL @ Sharyn - Making this post even more awesome with Harry Potter! <3

January 26, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterNikki

someone on my facebook actually spelled both team names like this when referring to the game. unfortunately it was the day of the game so i know she's not witty enough to be referring to this blog. said person types like this all the time. if i knew she wasn't a stay at home mom, i'd swear she worked in the bakery for a kroger or walmart.

January 26, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterKatie

HEAD! PANTS! NOW!

January 26, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterChris

Arghghghgh. The flashbacks!!! When I was a kid, "Giant" was my word in a spelling bee. I spelled it "Gaint" even though I knew better. *trembles* I can still remember the laughter. :( *wanders off to find some cake*

January 26, 2012 | Unregistered Commenterwildmaven

am i the only one thinking "football is fabulous!" should be on the table with them? (remember the pink with the redsox picks?)

January 26, 2012 | Unregistered Commenteranon

Dear Jen,

You have just made my day by using the Pentaverate in one of your posts. You rock my socks off.

Sincerely, Me

January 26, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterHairproductjunkie

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