The World's Most Unfortunate Wedding Monogram

This isn't it.
Thanks to Ruth H. for the initial discomfort.
Note from john: For those you you who may not know, usually "DOA" stands for "Dead On Arrival." Less common meanings are "Dead Or Alive", "Date Of Arrest" and the ever-popular, "Darkener Of Apricot."
Reader Comments (69)
...I don't get it.
My husband and I have the combined initials of KKK - no monogrammed white towels for us...
How on earth did they miss that?!
I don't get it either. Is it "Dead on Arrival"? "Department of Administration"?
There's a marriage that ain't gonna last long! LOL oy mama!
Hee Hee...good thing their not superstitious! Dead on Arrival...oh, my, Jen, how did you restrain yourself?
Great, now I'm going to have the sing stuck in my head for the next hour. :)
Btw John, my load time was much faster today!
Seems like they could have switched the initials... AOD wouldn't have raised any eyebrows.
Kelly- your comment was a super LOL (:
This is why I never got serious with a guy who had a last name that started with S. Then my initials would be A$$
Either English is not their first language, or they did it deliberately and proudly so that they could be featured on CW. Looks like yummy chocolate, at least!
Awwww, I miss the wv!
I made it a point to find a guy with the same last initial so I wouldn't have to change mine. :)
*facepalm* How did no one see this?!
My ex-husband's sister didn't realize her daughter's monogram is "STD" until somebody monogrammed something for her. Gotta be careful about those things! lol
It's not THAT obvious. Who goes around with a memory full of acronyms??
my, that's unfortunate!
unless it's a funeral cake.....
maybe the father of the bride is in the mob and it's a threat to his new son-in-law...
Other equivalents...STD, HIV
Just as long as they aren't paramedics or Emergency Room staff!
Well throw some flowers on that tombstone and ... oh, they already did.
As long as it isn't a warning label of what you will be "if" you eat the cake! Do you think that chocolate is laced with laxatives?
@Kelly - maybe just stick with the one K monogram - his/hers/ours it works LOL!
Oh my. I don't know if I'd even want to eat a cake labeled that way. What's in it?
maybe if the bachelor or bachelorette parties get a little crazy...
With a monogram, the middle letter should be taller than those on either side. Had that been done, I don't think the acronym would have been quite as obvious. Instead the wreckorator produced a "D" that is almost as tall as the "O" and an "A" that is physically shorter and, thanks to the stylized font, looks shorter still.
Another sizing solution could have been to put the monogram on the opposite side. If the "A" were on the shorter end of the sloping bottom tier, it would have produced the illusion of uniform letters.
wv
R.I.P.
2008-2011
word verification quietly passed away on Friday, August 5, 2011, after a brief but fun run on the Cake Wrecks blog site. A mystery so some (what’s this wv?) and a delight to many, it brought an added dimension of humor to an already hilarious site. For some it was the frosting on their comments. I loved wv, and found it stretched my mind in ways I didn’t think possible (or desirable, at times….). I only passed on one: peenes. It was a hard decision, but I thought, I’m not gonna touch it. I wasn’t afraid of the outcome – I knew nothing would come of it, but in a rare moment of better judgment, I kept my hands off. (Funny, I did feel blue afterwards….)
So here’s to you, wv. Thanks for that extra opportunity to indulge in some mental gymnastics, for another chance to chuckle, and for supplying us with a fun way to get our MDRS (Minimum Daily Requirement of Silliness).
wv is survived by it’s relative CAPTCHA, and thousands of fans.
*Darkener of apricot*
For some reason, that made my day. :)
That's why I won't monogram things for my daughter - it spells "ARF"
Ignoring the initials for a moment... what happened with the polka dots? The top row is evenly spaced, then each subsequent row becomes more chaotic. Did they try to place the dots randomly and fail? Did the wreckerator not have anything with a straight edge (such as a knife or a spatula or the side of a square cake pan) to use as a guideline? Ah well. Stick some flowers on it and call it a day.
Years ago, Conan O'Brien told a story about buying a monogrammed photo album for his parents' anniversary. He ended up with a gorgeous leather-bound volume... with "ROT" embossed on the cover.
Here in Iowa, they recently renamed the Department of Elderly Affairs...to the Department of Aging. This must be the cake from the ceremony.
Boy, I like the ever-threatening Darkener of Apricots. The menace in that sends chills right up and down my cottage cheese salad.
They could have made it a little better if they had done small his first intital LARGE LAST INITIAL small her first initial.
Maybe they have a macabre sense of humor and/or are proclaiming to the world their complete lack of belief in jinxes. It could also be an attempt to preempt the inevitable gag gifts (monogrammed black towels, etc).
In my case, the wedding monogram as traditionally constructed would be my initials (her first initial and my middle and last are the same). I can hear it now: "Ok, that must be the groom's cake. Where's the wedding cake?"
I see we have another 'Craig' on the board now. Welcome.
Kudos to Mel for the eloquent eulogy for wv. It will be missed....
Um. Wow.
Truely a monumental wreck.
I just did my first wedding cake for non-family/non-friends... and the entire time my mantra was "as long as it doesn't end up as a CW, I'm good." LOL
I love your blog, and I'm amazed each and every day at what some so-called professionals churn out!
There is a remote possibility that husband and wife both collect Asian ball jointed dolls. DoA is the acronym for the online forum Den of Angels. Or, if you turn it around to AoD, you get an Asian ball jointed doll company named Angel of Dream. Better than the alternatives!
Oh Mel, you made me cry...
A loose translation from Portuguese to English, "Doa" stands for "May it hurt".
"Doa" is from the verb "Doer" that means "To hurt". Appropriate, no? :D
I miss wv too.. thanks for the WV obituary Mel.... Funny cake!
Yeah no "Dead on arrival" cake at my ceremony! My daughter is getting married in less than 2 years and her fiance's last name begins with an O and their monogram is ROB or BOR. No monogrammed cake for them either! LOL
We got a wedding invitation from my husband's cousin and at the top were the beautifully embossed initials "KKK." My husband said his cousin (the bride) most likely had no idea of the connotation. I wish they would have incorperated it into their cake.
the initials are least of the worries....that 'frosting' job looks like somebody slapped on duncan hines with a butter knife and piped on some cake mate frosting in the tube....the flowers from michaels on the top are a nice touch ;P
Oh yeah. I *totally* thought of "Darkener of Apricots" when I first saw "DOA" on the cake. Didn't everybody?? ;)
Some friends who recently got married included their monogram on their invite. It read: a S s
We didn't use a monogram, because it would have been RIP!
I almost thought it was a groom's cake…and when I clicked on it I expected to see a Wife statue dragging her DOA man behind her!
as a cake decorator (please let that never become "wreckerator" I just can't believe nobody tried to talk the happy couple out of using their initials... sometimes they're just not pretty together... sometimes the cake style doesn't work with big honking letters... and sometimes they spell doom and gloom for the happily wedded couple :)
My husband was going to be named Christopher Owen Douglas, until a helpful relative pointed out that his initials would be COD!
Kelly you made my day!
The wv obit was great, didn't know what that was til then, so thanks!
Janice LOL!
I live next door to a Nicaraguan church group, who we "affectionately" call the "Army of Darkenss" or AOD...this could possibly work as well, no? LOL
No one told you life was gonna be this way...
Your cake's a joke, it's broke
Your wedding's DOA!
Okay, I don't know what's funnier- the cakes, or your witty comments about them. I have never laughed so hard in my entire life at some of the things you have on your site, and my teens think they're hilarious, too. Thanks so much for posting- keep up the good work!
My Initials after marrying are PMS- not something I want to see monogrammed anywhere. But if it were, a giant chocolate cake would be the most appropriate.
My husband's and my dual monogram is STD if we put his initial first, so needless to say, we are DTS all the way!