Great Wrecks In Store
August 26, 2010 Loyal Henchpersons, it has come to my attention that some of you are now concerned about ordering a cake. You feel there's no hope; that you're doomed to receiving a Wreck no matter what precautions you take. And for some strange reason, I feel a little responsible for this.
Well, good news, cake consumers: I'm here to restore your confidence! That's right: we're going to take a little field trip over to the local grocer's bakery. C'mon.
[pulling into parking lot] Aw, look! That must be the decorator's car! See, now that is an artist who takes his craft seriously.
Don't worry; I'm sure "CACE" is just an acronym.Or a pun.
Or...something.
See?[heading down main aisle]
Oooh, check it out! There's a sale on...er...wait. What does that say?
Ok, I can see you're getting a little concerned here. And, yes, three of the five words in the product name are misspelled. But, hey, they got "air" and "Febreze" right and those are tough! Besides, I'm sure the bakery employees are much more literate.In fact, let's get over there; we have a cake to order!
Well, it's nice to know their ingredients may or may not be certifiable. Like I always say, a little mystery adds spice to life! Right? [elbowing ribs] Right?[arriving at bakery counter] Ah, here we are! Now, let's get that cake ordered!
Hey, where are you going?Tell you what: I'll tell the nice employee here what we want, and you go grab some candles, ok? Meet you back here in five.
[five minutes later]
Oh, good, you found the candles! So...why don't you look happy?
Ah. Well...on the bright side, I doubt our decorator had anything to do with this! Heheheh - no?Look, just to prove to you that everything is going to be alright, I got a copy of the order form the baker submitted for us. I'm sure once you look it over, all your concerns will be gone.
Um. We did want to be "Drawed a picture of a Thrown," right?
Oh, quit complaining: a double inscription means double the fun!
And centering is boring.
And teal is kind of like "royal blue." In as much as it's blue. Ish.
And it only looks a little like a shower chair toilet thingy.
And...hey, where are you going? We still have to add the candles! Come back!
Well, Wreckies, I hope this little excursion has helped allay your fears of professional cake ordering. Now go forth, and order cakes!
And maybe bring your cameras. You know, just in case.
Tesha W., Cathy W., Amanda D., Noelle R., Maggie C., Morgan W., & Penske, I guess that order was such a royal pain that it blue right past the wreckerators and had them throne for a loop. So I guess we'll call it a "drawed."
Reader Comments (89)
I seriously dont know which is more ugly...that dreadful car or hideous cake...they both made me want to cry :(
Excellent post. I'm glad I'm not the only one bothered by all the misspellings in the world. It's good to be able to laugh at them! :-)
Best post ever! Just hilarious!
Wow. That car is awesome, although I think the candles are a bit over the top. Heehee.
I. Love. This post :)
That was the funniest thing I have seen all day! Well, it is only 9:41am, but still, so funny!!! Oh, wait, did I spell that rite? Ah, good, no silly red squiggly lines under any of my words..That's how to live life, watching out for the squiggly red lines under us.
P. S. How cute is Matt Smith as the new doctor? [just picked up season 5] I wasn't sure he'd pull it off, but he manages well! Spoiler...the last doctor regeneration will have ginger hair! [fingers crossed]
I don't know about anyone else, but whenever I order a cake or even walk past the bakery displays, I'm half-hoping to get/see a wreck. Alas, the bakers in my area seem to be annoyingly competent at their job. Either that, or I'm frequenting the right (any by that, I mean wrong) places.
bahahahah maybe your best one yet!!!!
I want one of those Flood Parking signs.
Excellent! Thanks for the field trip. And you wonder how these people ever graduated...then I read the spelling of teachers on Facebook and I know!
Sharon's Edible Art
Thanks for the field trip! I feel so much better!
http://agirlinherkitchen.blogspot.com
Very funny. The "Writting" sign was just to much.
I'm "writting" this to say thank you for making me laugh - again and again and.....
WV: squalit
What some cakerwreckerators do when writing on a cake, you know - just squalit down and hope the customer doesn't notice.
wow, I LOL'd IRL at the birthday candles
I shouldn't mention this but.... I'm pretty cure I misspelled "case" when I submitted the car photo. But either way.... AHAHAHAHAHA! Love the story, totally funny. =)
WV: suppin
I'm bored, wanna do suppin?
Same here, TechyDad. Crarg, I say!
Truly one of my favorite posts! And, I too, am bothered by the misspellings in the world. (I think my favorite was the package of candles, though)
Thanks for bringing the laughter every day! (Except Saturdays. aww)
Oh, so happy! Two of my fave blogs (cakewrecks, of course, and the blog of unneccesary quotes) collide. Brilliant story telling!
I must say, though, that the sign for the air freshener has me totally irked. How is the savings "up to" 60 cents? I swear, that is going to be bothering me all day.
hahahaha!! This post was excellent, I love it. Thank you so much for a daily dose of humor. and cake. :-)
I'd totally order from the "writting" person. He/she had good penmanship!
*headdesk*
Really???
*headdesk*
I think I want to stay home for the foreseeable future. Now I'm afraid to go into the grocery store at all, much less the bakery.
Unless my monitor is off, that icing on "Farewell to the Queen" looks more powder-blue than teal to me. Not royal blue, in any case. Next time I want to be Drawed a picture of a Thrown, I'll know to ask to see the icing color in advance, before the baker does the Writting on the cake.
Allayed my fears?
Nope.
You've just made my life harder.
Everyone I ever sent here to enjoy the laughter is calling me to do their cake.
Thnaks. Yeah, "rilly".
~~Di
ps - totally love how you find and organize the photos so well in conjunction with your storyline.
wv - harifil -- these signs are harifil portents of the future of the English language.
Those providing the 'writting' on these messes are also selling their 'dinning' room sets on craigslist... the 'thrown' — spelling and drawing — were AWESOME!
Oh! the other craigslist typo that's reached epidemic proportions is describing things as 'hugh'! Makes me insane!
Erm, "alright" isn't a word. It's "all right."
WV: cousn. I wouldn't give this cake to my least-favorite cousn.
Bonjour Kayk,
The word "alright" has been in use since the 19th century and is an accepted merging of the words "all" and "right." Though some folks still object to its usage. Which is strange since "although" and "altogether" are equally acceptable conjunctions and there doesn't seem to be any issue with them.
So there.
john
ps. You spelled "cake" wrong.
;)
Actually, it's only 3 out of 5 words spelled incorrectly on the air freshener ad; "Febreze" is the correct spelling of the brand name. How they managed to get that right and mangle the rest is beyond me. :)
I feel it's my civic duty to inform you that "Febreze" is the correct spelling of that particular brand. Even though it may seem to be a better portmanteau of "February" and "Breeze" than "Fabric" and "Breeze."
And I thought the "garadge sale" sign we drove past last weekend was bad...
Ha! That kind of reminds me of this book, which the grammar ogre in me is absolutely DYING to read!!! http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=129086941
Jade and TJ,
Boops. You are absolutely right. And apparently, what looks like poor spelling is really marketing genius.
Thanks for watching our proverbial backs.
john
All that misspelling makes my skin crawl! I don't think I will ever order a cake again - I think I'll just get a can of spam and put a candle on it...
To go with everything else, I guess it's appropriate that the bottom edge of the cake was crooked too.
I can't believe how many signs I see misspelled... I think it was in JFK airport that I saw a sign for the "Baggagge Claim"
How sad is it when all I asked of for a birthday cake was a certifiable Wreck???
Thanks for the laughs and the hopes that one day I may get a wreck of my very own!
O_O; That "throne" looks more like the electric chair from the Green Mile. Even John Coffey couldn't heal this mess; it's terminal.
As usual, I'm speechless by the sheer amount of wreckitude. Wow. I'm surprised they didn't get a baseball cake or something with those sketchy directions.
OR a cake with just those words on it. And nothing else. Or perhaps just the word 'THROWN'. Cakewrecks has taught me that NOTHING is impossible.
Haha! For some reason I thought of http://www.asylum.com/2010/08/10/great-typo-hunt-jeff-deck-benjamin-herson-correct-grammar/?icid=mainhp-desktopdl5link3http%3A%2F%2Fwww.asylum.com%2F2010%2F08%2F10%2Fgreat-typo-hunt-jeff-deck-benjamin-herson-correct-grammar%2F" rel="nofollow">THIS
as I was reading this post. Those of you who get annoyed by misspellings as much as I do should enjoy it. They even have a book!
To be fair, that cake was done in whipped icing (see, it was circled on the order form!) and it's nearly impossible to get a dark color like royal blue in whipped icing. The icing just doesn't like to take that much coloring without going wet and flat and bitter.
... but the rest, totally true. -.-
HBPPY
HBPPY
My daughter just started Kindergarten. And she knows what's wrong with that. And CACE.
WV: WAXED what? A real word for a wv? What's this world coming to?
I ordered a cake from the grocery store for my birthday. I was a little afraid to do so. I am picking it up on Saturday. I must admit that I want it to look nice, but I also want to be able to send you blog fodder. We will see how things go!
I so enjoy this site! Now y'all need to check out http://unnecessaryquotes.com for some hilarious commentary on the overuse of "quotation" "marks". I'll never get any work done around here . . . =-D
I love this post - maybe even one of your best ones yet! But on the other hand, oh god help us all...
even better... the regence ad matches the cake perfectly.
.... JEEZ! I did it again! Ok, that's it. I am completely unable to spell "cace" without triple checking it and accidentally changing it to an actual word!! lol
WV: welymen
Welymel... when "Happy Falker Satherhood" just doesn't cut it!
This makes me glad that my grocery bakery sells slices of cake, no writing necessary.
One of the best posts EVER!
Love it...but why would anyone want a picture of a car going through an automated car wash on their cake? Oh, it's a throne. Right. Been a long time since you lot had a royal family, I guess!
The flood zone parking was only a "risk" when someone left the cake car out in the rain... Now just try to get that song out of your head!