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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Friday
May282010

This Weekend, Pig Out

Since Monday is Memorial Day, I thought you guys might appreciate a few food tips before your weekend get-togethers kick off.

Tip #1: So long as you have beer and bacon, all of your male friends will be happy.

Which is why I, as a girl, think it would be hilarious if you substituted all the beer and bacon with beer and bacon cakes, like this one. Just think how pleased the guys will be at the surprise!

Tip #2: Know your pig.

Calm down; I mean the animal.

Sometimes I think a vegan named these things. "Haha! I will name THIS one 'jowl butt,' so NO ONE will EVER want to eat it! Mwuhahahahaa!

Now, who wants some niiice fresh asparagus?"

Tip #3: Sometimes it helps to channel your inner Freddie.

Ewwww.

Tip #4: Or, if you're like me and subscribe to the "no guts; too gory" philosophy of food, try the all-inclusive cooking method:

Just don't forget the apple.
I don't know why. Just...don't.

Bonus: When you're done, you'll have a lovely centerpiece!


"I see you eating that jowl butt. And, yeah, I'm totally judging you."


Never mind all that, though, because the important thing to remember here is the glory of bacon.


Apparently it even makes 40 better. Although what that has to do with a mountain range at sunset is beyond me.

Julie B., Kellie B., Jade B., Dorota, Monica I., & Melissa C., notice how I didn't say anything about head cheese? Yep. Some lines you just don't cross.

« Sunday Sweets: Shoes & Purses | Main | Der Burger! »

Reader Comments (73)

@ Amy, cute idea! it would be so much fun to serve that way!

"Jowl butt, anyone?"

wv: humme. what a happy person would do while carving up these cakes.

May 29, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

"Bacon is the fairy dust of the food community" To make anything taste better they wrap it around it or sprinkle on top.

"the pig is an amazing animal. You feed a pig an apple and it makes bacon!"

"I like dogs but pigs would be a good companion. when they die you could have a barbecue. 'Sorry your pig died. Can I come over for breakfast?'"

"The success of Kevin Bacon is somehow tied to his name."

ah, pork. the source of all happiness. religions that restrict it are just cruel. (joke)

thanks for that funny video post, Emily!

May 29, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterbaconlover

Is Cheryl a butcher or a serial killer? Just what are we celebrating here? And why does that steak look like a heart?

Why am I now thinking of Sweeney Todd now...a shop selling meat pies made out of human victims. "Good luck in your new business, Cheryl!"

Or maybe it's a creative divorce cake....

May 29, 2010 | Unregistered Commenteroff to a slow start

Cake#1 Did they actually wrap that cake in plastic & put a grocery store sticker on it?

Cake #3 Is that real meat on the cake or is it cake? And the utensils?

The animal "head" cakes are hideous. I could never eat that.

Oh my, I love cake wrecks.

May 29, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterThatDeborahGirl

@thatdeborahgirl- no it's not real meat :) it's cake and very very red frosting and the utensils are made of fondont.

May 29, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJade B

in cake #1, the beer can is cake, too. right?

and for those of you scifi fans of SGA, remember the scene from the episode, The Storm. the one where while the marines are guarding the gate, they discuss the things they miss most about being in another galaxy? Bacon.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aET0crK2iY0

May 29, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I think 'head cheese' is the most disturbing.

May 29, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterHeidi D

Ohhh, these are so GROSS!! But in a good way! I wish I could get one of those nasty bacon cakes for my husband's birthday, just to see his reaction (and to capture it on film forever)...

May 29, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterRebecca Grace

... now I'm really going to barf.....

May 29, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

So does the US Memorial day commemorate deceased pigs?

If so - why?

May 29, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

That boar's head cake....eeeyagh! I don't want to eat a severed head of anything cake that's staring at me!

At least this post made a silk purse out of a sow's ear?

May 29, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterA

You know, on the first picture, there is totally a hidden Martin Luther King, Jr. right underneath the price label, a little to the right.

May 29, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAmber

What EXACTLY is Cheryl being wished "Good luck!" for? Graduating Butcher school maybe? If that's not it....then I'm scared.....

WV: upulc
I'll upulc before anyone can make me eat Cheryl's cake!

May 30, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMelissa

TWO postings in one day! How awesome!

The first bacon cake is amazing... while my reaction was "ewww, as a cake?!" I know some people who would consider that the stuff of died-and-gone-to-heaven. However, I'm not sure if I'd call that can "beer". Yellow water, maybe ;)

The rest were well done but... I'm now considering keeping kosher ;)

May 30, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAliza

#1 Since most guys -- including me -- are cake (eating) fanatics, I doubt they'd mind.

#2 Actually well-executed (pardon the pun) -- where is the wreck?

#3 Seriously disturbing. The 'steak' looks like a heart, so what is Cheryl being wished luck with -- her trial? Does anyone else hear the signature music from Psycho?

Speaking of t-taxidermy, #4 looks like a baby elephant, what with the outsize ears and extra-long snout. Poor Dumbo... Nicely caramelized, though. Eww.

#6 Also seriously disturbing. Maybe it's just me, but two things I like in a cake are: it's not watching me eat it, and no herbal garnish. In fact, I would call those requirements. Diet aid.

#7 Bacon may make 40 better; what would have made the cake better? A pre-decorating visit to the local butcher? Dialing the airbrush down from 'tactical assault' to 'decorate'?

May 30, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterCraig

I don't want to 'hog' the comments, but I just thought of an obvious one (with apologies to anyone already posted with the same idea):

The bacon cakes should be frosted with lard. (Apologies to anyone who just ate before reading that, as well).

May 30, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterCraig

Jen isn't the only one with counting difficulties.

I'm calling this one on myself: 1,2,3,4,6,7? I learnt them countin' numbers real good. ;-)

BTW, I loved the Sweeney Todd reference on the Cheryl (Chessman?) cake.

May 31, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterCraig

ah head cheese. Worked in a meat warehouse once... dropped every type of meat at one point or another. Generally the boxes just fall and stay down, but head cheese boxes... well... they bounced like rubber balls. That aside, i do like the pig diagram.

May 31, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterEvalis

All I can think of is poor Piggy and Simon in Lord of the Flies. "Kill the pig. Spill his blood!" Ug. If I ever teach sophomore English again, maybe I'll a pig on stick cake making contest.

May 31, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJ. Turner

Just stick cake #5 on a pole. Ooh, how about a giant candy cane?

June 3, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMikewind Dale

The #2 Cuts Chart was my husbands idea to bring to pig roast. The butchers there loved it! I just thought the little piggie was cute. The cake was Tomato Soup Spice Cake with Cinnamon Cream Cheese Frosting! So, to me, it tasted better than it looked!
~kellie b

June 5, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Not more meat cakes....thats just wrong! xx

October 13, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterCupcakes Lady

The pig's head cake reminds me of Lord of the Flies!

November 24, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterKristy

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