Der Burger!
May 28, 2010 As you are no doubt aware, today is National Hamburger Day. It's a day of celebration. Of history. Of patriotism. And, of course, of ridiculous amounts of icing smooshed between two cake layers.
Mmmm. Lovely.
"Hey, hey, bay-bee! You got some fries with that cake?"Whassat? Just dry cake crusts? Oh. Never mind."
"Is that really a burger cake? And if so, what are the red pointy things? Or the yellow pointy thing? Is the fireworks doodad supposed to be helping? Do they honestly expect me to pay $9.99 for this? Really?!?"
Good questions, all, but more importantly...
...am I the only one seeing a giant alien head here?C'mon, green eyes, brown lips, cranium about to explode like a jiffy-pop bag? You see it, right?
Ok, ok, so it's easy to make fun of cupcake cakes (haaaaaw-ptooie!). It's not like it's much harder with these:
Bringing "dirty-iced" to a whole new level.(A dirty, dirty level.)
I call this one "The High Hat" -
"The containment field can't last much longer! Everyone to the exits!""The Bonfire" -
(Onion smoke rings cost extra.)And finally, "Peter's Pack of Peppers" -
Now with beach sand topping!Ashley M., Angela E., Alicia B., Christy M., Lindsey F., Julia G., Torie C., Stefanie M., Abelina V., & Paula B., have it your way.
And in case you missed it before, here's the reason John will randomly exclaim, "Der Burger!"
Reader Comments (94)
That Pink Panther clip is great! My husband loves to quote that scene, too.
In the Escaped Experiment cakes, I love how there is so much frosting shoved in there that they can barely keep the lid on the cake carriers. Not that that much frosting is a bad thing, but it doesn't make for a pretty cake.
I think the "dirty iced" cake is an omelette cake gone horribly wrong.
Sugar Chic Cakes did an excellent rendition of a hamburger. The bonfire one at first glance I thought it was a volcanic mound smoldering. Hmmm...I may have to rethink my lunch choice for today. I may have flashbacks to those cakes and need therapy.
I'm seriously jealous. We NEVER find good wrecks like this round here. I need to move to find something worthwhile. These are just AWESOME! I epecially love the stack of science experiments.
Where you saw an alien, I saw two giant turds garnished with Ketchup, mustard and relish...
OH MY GAWD! I have no words. No words at all.
How the first cake came to be:
Manager: "Can you gather up all the leftover cake and icing from this week, please?"
Worker: "You got it boss. But the trash guy already left for the weekend."
Manager: "Hmm."
I can Totally see an alien face!! LOL!
Love, Elly
Now I really wish I could figure out how to upload photos off my cellphone. I actually found a potentially wrecky hamburger cake a few weeks ago!
I'm thinking that maybe the last one is supposed to be a taco, hence the peppers.
Those are all probably better than I could do.
Under the "High Hat" - will someone please explain "conditioned fudge"?
(Jen - thanks as always for making me smile!)
The burger has fangs! That's what those pointy things are.
The "dirty" one looks like pancakes. eewww!
Oy! I want to go to Smash Burger now to rid my mind of these horrible wrecks!
If I watch that scene from the Pink Panther a hundred times, it will never stop being funny! Thanks for sharing! You always make me laugh!
Please tell me these wrecks don't have SESAME SEEDS on the "buns"!!! Sesame seeds and cake don't mix - end of story.
I am more curious about what "conditioned fudge" is.
Melissa
Hmmm, after seeing this CakeWrecks, I convinced a coworker to get some cheeseburgers for our company meeting today.
But then I did some research online and all the sites that mention a 'Nation Cheeseburger Day' say that it's September 18th.
Ooh, and for another Sweet burger, check out Charm City Cakes' version they created when Guy Fiery visited the bakery - awesome as always!
So the burger cakes are always funny, but it has sunk to a new low now that the "fries" are just stale cake scraps. That's sad.
Alien head? No, I see a couple of floaters left by someone who needs to see a doctor ASAP. There really should be a licensing agency in charge of brown icing.
Squinty little green alien eyes and a very weird green soul patch!
I'm not a fan of Steve Martin, but that is the best part of the Pink Panther movie. Anytime my family and I are making hamburgers we botch it up to sound like him.
GLARGH!!!
While I admire the artistry of the well done hamburger cake (heh heh well done, get it?) I am funny about stuff like this. I can't eat cake that looks like something else. I freak out. The bad ones, well... ew, revolting!
I did a halloween cake once with oreo "dirt" and gummy worms and a gray tombstone. It was by request. I actually hated it and couldn't eat it because ew, gray, ew dirt, ew worms! I ended up getting rid of the tombstone pan because I got tired of disgusting requests.
Fangs! and long, yellow, pointy Gene Simmons tongue! Those say "hamburger" to me. Actually they say "run for the hills, your food has gone to the bad!"
I also really, really want to see onion smoke rings. That would be so cool.
my WV is ating: I'm ating these faux burgers.
Thank you for the wrecks, and
clammering to know what "conditioned fudge" is.
My guess?
A form of olestra.
mocking
That second cake actually looks like a hamburger. What a revelation! Now I know what all those other wreckorators were trying for, however cluelessly. Cake Number Two's baker even used an airbrush without the result looking horrible. Wow!
I usually never LOL at your site, but today I did. Several times.
I was cruising BiLo last night about 11 PM and came across a burger cake and fries. Was going to submit it, looks like I'm too late! It even had ketchup icing for the fries.
Oh no, the vampire craze has spread even to hamburger cakes (the one with the red pointy things)!
Seriously, who knew there were so many burger cakes out there?
P.S. Every time I even look like I'm going to cruise my grocery store's bakery the bakers immediately look up and demand in a snippy tone, "Can I help you?" And I'm not even wearing a wreckporter T or carrying a camera!
I am so glad that we are not planning to have burgers this weekend! I just lost all desire for beef and bread...
"CONDITIONED" FUDGE:
A type of fudge/frosting that is very sensitive, and therefore is required to go through a rigorous training and desensitizing program before it is anywhere NEAR ready to be put on any horrendously ugly cake.
There you go.
=^u.u^=
I think my favorite was the dried cake crust french fries-that had me laughing out loud after I figured out they were supposed to fries and not extra cake just thrown on the side!
For some reason on the one you called "The Escaped Experiment" all I can think of is how if that were a REAL burger, you know how the lettuce on burgers tends to be kind of wilty, maybe bordering on 'too old to really be consuming' so I think my intestines kind of seized up in fear upon viewing it.
....Then I realized that was giving it too much credit, as that's assuming that crazy mountain actually resembles a hamburger with lettuce. Which it doesn't :)
The nonwreck looked great, the others looked like it send me into a sugar coma
I teach English in France. I *live* that clip.
::mounting soapbox::
I live in an area of China that has no McDonalds. There are no hamburger joints of any kind. There are 15+ KFC's and they do have a "chicken burger" but it's not a hamburger.
As someone who only eats hamburgers during visits to the United States, I would like to know:
WHY WOULD ANYONE WANT A HAMBURGER CAKE??? Puh-leeze! Enjoy your hamburger in the form of a hamburger! Enjoy your cake in some other form.
::bows. off soapbox::
Okay. I feel better now!
OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG
My 2 1/2 year old is sitting here next to me exclaiming "Yucky!" "It's gross!" "Yuck!" "So yucky!" over and over and over and louder and louder and louder.... Then.... "More yucky?" ROFLMAO!!!!
I can't stop laughing! THANK YOU!
wv: larging. The sound one makes when trying to swallow a piece of one of these enormous globs of coma-inducing icing piles.
Yikes - those are truly hideous "cakes."
But, I truly commented only to post my WV: derases.
Seeing der burger cakes caused them to laugh off der ases.
Hee hee.
No doubt someone else has already POINTed this out, but the pointy things are supposed to be fireworks. I had to zoom in to see it better. Why, you can even see little bursts (with little chicken feet (?) on them) on the tail end of them, indicating that they are zooming up into the night sky....
..........
....OOOOO! AAHHHH!
Yeah.
=^e.e^=
@WriteCards:
WELCOME TO AMERICA!!!
=^~.~^=
The one that looks like an alien also looks like a character from Genesis' video "Land of Confusion."
I thought National Hamburger Day was in July. Are you two months early for this one, maybe? :)
You know, I have the feeling that a Big Mac in all its raging caloric glory would actually be healthier than having a piece of some of these overly frosted monstrosities.
At least it would LOOK better. and no doubt TASTE better!
"High Hat" cake looks to me like it was made in anger (like they just whomped that top part on, quit the job and stomped out. Don't know why I get that feeling...I just do.
The "Escaped Experiment," I think, just *could* be a secret stash--a stockpile, if you will--of radioactive or nook-you-ler weapons disguised as cakes. There certainly are a LOT of them. And will ALL of them be sold? I think NOT. Check out those "watermelon" ones...bet they glow in the dark.
And zoom in really close and you can see, way in the back, some green, POD-like things...NEED I say more?
I'm getting goosebumps...
=^@.@^=
Look at that one you called the "High Hat" and underneath is a sign that says "conditioned fudge". What in the WORLD is "conditioned fudge"?????
"Conditioned fudge" made me feel rather nervous.....
So I love the Pink Panther "der burger" bit on its own, but didn't believe it was realistic until I lived in France. They really so pronounce it like that. Really and truly.