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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Friday
Jun122009

Star Wars Weekend

Tomorrow John and I are going to the Star Wars Weekends out at Disney. This is the event that causes our friends who work at Disney - even the hardened sci-fi geeks - to go blank-faced with terror, so needless to say I'm pretty psyched about it. (Apparently we Trekkers have nothing on Star Wars fans in the crazy department.) So in honor of the occasion, and for those of you too distant/sane to attend, here's some Wreckage to get you in the intergalactic mood.

This fun little number features a puddle of R2D2 (or possibly an attempt at Captain America's shield?) in the upper left-hand corner, and a Ferengi Marauder in the lower right-hand corner. [head tilt] Huh.

Hey, uh, Wreckerators? It's probably not wise to cross the sci-fi/geekery streams. Especially the Trek/Wars streams. You never, ever want to do tha...

Oh no you di'n't, Matt B.!

(Ok, so Matt's friends Wrecked it on purpose. It's still funny, though.)


Come to the Dark Side. We have granite texture-in-a-can.

Plus, our storm troopers have huge...

Uh...

Goiters?


Yeah, let's go with goiters. No one knows what those are, anyway.


Bobble-headed Yoda you will love. Awesome is he:

His lack of legs, disturbing I find.

Little known fact: the first R2D2 prototype was made using only Styrofoam, blue painter's tape, and a Sharpie:

Plus, did you guys know that R2D2's birth name was Reginald Dillingham? It's true. I wouldn't lie to you. (Unless it was funny. Or I was bored. Or cake was involved. But this, this is true. Honest.)

And lastly, J. Williamson's local paper featured this as a "hot new trend" in weddings:

So naturally you're thinking, "Gee, Jen, people are serving Wolfman's head on a platter at weddings?"

(This is Wolfman, by the way:)


The answer, of course, is no - and I laugh in the face of your childish naivete. Hahahah! Ahhahaha! Mwaha. Ha. Aha.

Yes, as I was saying, the answer is no - because people are in fact serving Chewbacca's head on a platter at their weddings. That's Chewbacca. See the resemblance?

That's what I thought.

Debra B., Luci, Katie R., Brandi M., & Anony, when it comes to cake, use the forks.

Related Wreckage: Do These Taste Chewy To You?

NOTE: Today's post is dedicated to CW reader Jacob Taylor, since I hear he's a big Star Wars fan. Jacob is 8 years old and was diagnosed with an inoperable brain tumor last month, so he and his family could use all the good wishes, prayers, and warm thoughts you'd care to send their way. The good news is that he's responding well enough to radiation treatment that he's back to reading again this week. So, hi, Jacob! Say, you bakers in the Cincinnati Ohio area, how's about whipping him up some organic cake to celebrate? (He's on an all-natural diet these days.)

« Wreckie Grad Shows Us How It's Done | Main | Expressions of "Graditude" »

Reader Comments (141)

Wolfman/Chewbacca on a platter looks more like a pile of Sculpey. If I see that at a wedding, I ain't havin' any!

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterEtiquette Bitch

The first cake is supposed to have the symbols of empire and rebellion. Not R2.

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterSW geek

The two emblems on the first cake are the Empire and the Alliance, aren't they? *ducks head in nerd shame*

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Hi Jacob! I will be keeping you in my prayers but I bet you won't need them!

I literally laughed until I cried at this post. Especially the storm trooper with the...uh...goiters.

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterBecs

When in Dagobah,
Swing by the Doll Dress Boutique.
Say, "Yoda sent me."

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterHaiku Joy

My favorite part is that the deliberate wreckers even said "Live long and PROPER!" Although, that is probably good advice too.

Jacob, my prayers are with you & your family. I am sure you will come through this just fine. Maybe you will even have a cool scar and be able to tell your friends it was from a shark attack or something :)

WV:ADVAI - If you are going to give advai on a cake, you should at least spell it correctly.

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Awwww! I hope Jacob gets inundated with cakes!

My prayers are coming right out to you buddy! (And your family)

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJudy

"Live long and proper!"
could be wreckier. Just say
"Live long, you pooper!"

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterHaiku Joy

Hi Jacob!! Sending you lots of prayers, smiles and hugs!

I kind of dig the granite in a can Darth Vader. But the Yoda had me laughing out loud.

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterjustmeandthevoices

Hi Jacob - our love and prayers to you. Laughter is the best medicine - keep reading Cake Wrecks. I know you will "Live Long and Proper!"

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Alopecia
Wookies John-the-Baptist style?
Salome = Leia?

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterHaiku Joy

Great collection of wrecks Jen.
Enjoy the weekend.

And HI Jacob!!! Prayers being sent! Continued success with his treatment.

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterCALpumper

A friend of mine scored this sweet boba fett cake for his birthday this year.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PzkW3u3Hai8&feature=channel_page

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterRandomeis

I've got a friend who works in the Marketing Dept at Busken in Cincinnati. Let me see what I can do for Jacob!

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterGot Triplets?

All I could think about re the Chewie head: "Hello? Is it me you're looking for?"

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I'm glad someone else mentioned the emblems on the first cake! Here's what they're supposed to look like:

http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/61xymUVLVcL._SL500_AA280_.gif

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/0/00/Galactic_Empire_logo.svg

Good luck Jacob!

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMeg Spencer

Greetings to Jacob!
Who's your favorite character?
Mine is so Yoda.

Painted on velvet
is Dagobah's Jedi knight
and on my room's wall!

Jacob, get well soon!
We're all rooting for you here.
Live long and proper!

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterHaiku Joy

Jacob, lots of love and hugs and prayers from Florida! I hope you get a wrecktastic organic cake so you can send us a picture, or maybe, even better, a Sunday sweet.

Jen, thanks, I'll probably be muttering goiters and shaking my head and laughing for the rest of the day, which is fine by me, but my coworkers are starting to wonder if they should call the people with the big butterfly nets.

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterYota Armai

Sending many, many good wishes to Jacob and his family. <3

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterChey

Yoda has a milk mustache.

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterHorribleLicensePlates

As others have noted, the R2-D2 puddle crossed with Cap's shield is supposed to be the Imperial emblem:

http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Galactic_Empire

And the Ferengi marauder is the symbol of the Rebel Alliance:

http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Alliance_Starbird

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMarcos

Prayers and good wishes to Jacob!

BTW on that first cale, I believe it's the http://images3.wikia.nocookie.net/starwars/images/thumb/2/2e/Imperial_Emblem.svg/600px-Imperial_Emblem.svg.png" rel="nofollow">Imperial Logo the Wrecker is attempting to emulate.

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterLauren

muah i just love your blogs!

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterLivingDeadNurse

Oh no, you did NOT just misspell Cincinnati!!

HAHAHAHAHA!!

Granite Vader got a little Alderaan on 'im.

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterFlartus

"Live long and proper."

MC Hammer IS Mr. Spock IN an enormous mistake.

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterdlauthor

Gotta respond on a few levels here -
1. I have a son, Jacob also, who is disabled and one of the biggest Star Wars fans ever! He checks into Cake Wrecks often so I am sure he will love your post today.

2. He will be bummed to hear that someone is going to Star Wars weekend at Disney and it isn't him! Want to rent a kid in a wheelchair? They're great for getting right to the front of the line!!!

3. Definitely will keep the Jacob you mentioned in my prayers - maybe my Jacob will email him and they can talk SW.

4. And last - because you have nothing else to do - check out my son's new blog: The Happy Wookiee
http://thehappywookiee.blogspot.com

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMary

Am really grateful l don't know what the heck any of you are talking about. :)

Angie (from over at www.HalfAssedKitchen.com)

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterHalf Assed Kitchen

StarWars Weekend at Disney, you ARE NUTS.

It's 100' in the pandhandle, Disney will be roasting!

Here to hoping your icing doesn't melt off !

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterCaryl

Are Darth "Granite" Vader's eye prunes?

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterBob Borst

Hi, Jacob. You and your family are in my prayers. I can tell you from experience that it is amazing what medicine can do these days. Live long and proper.

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterblueiguana

Jacob! Many prayers for you bud! Make sure your parents give you a giant "Git Well Soone" (organic) fudgey chocolate cake!

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterStacie

Warmest wishes to Jacob for a speedy recovery filled with lots more CW laughs!!! xoxox

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I'm guessing Jason is at Cincinnati Children's. I hope he is able to see this (they do have internet access in rooms) and knows that thousands of people are thinking/praying of him.

Great wrecks as usual Jen.

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMichelle

Hi Jacob! Said a little prayer for you, friend!

(hopefully you read the comments... or you mom or dad does & can tell you!)

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterSusan

That top cake is the exact same one my little brother just had for his birthday! Must be Wal-mArt or something.

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered Commenter:::b r a n d i:::

Hi Jacob! Sending warm, loving, healthy thoughts your way!

Now, if someone presented me with that clay sculpture of... er... whoever's head that is, I would throw it at them! However, your take on all these cakes, as usual Jen, is hilarious!

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered Commentereilbeback

Oh goodness Jen. I visit Cake Wrecks every day for a giggle or two, but you outdid yourself today. I'm not even a trekkie, but tears are rolling. From laughing, of course! Thanks!

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterFrannie, AKA Q's Maid

Many Prayers for you and your family Jacob! I know it's hard now, but someday you'll have quite the story to tell! We have two little boys at my church as well who have cancer- one is only 4 and the other 7 and we've been praying really hard for them too. I hope that you're able to get out and enjoy some of your summer. Enjoy cakewrecks as much as I do!! Laughter IS the BEST- and Jen is REALLY great at making me laugh, even out loud!

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnniebananie

Wow! This is a well-timed post!

My own Jacob turns 8 today! And I made him Star wars cupcakes to take to his class today.
They are topped with crossed light sabers made from multi-colored twizzlers and tootsie rolls.
See?! http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2236187&id=121420&l=49fcb10c2c

Prayers going out to your Jacob!

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMarian the Librarian

LOL I'll have to pug your site today on The Happy Wookiee my star wars blog http://thehappywookiee.blogspot.com/

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJediman

Live long & prosper, Jacob! Something tells me you are one tough dude & that this thing can't beat you! Sending you tons of "kick butt, Jacob" cheers!

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterDorfmunder

As a star wars fan i always THOUGHT it'd be cool to have a star wars cake.... but...uhh... maybe NOT....

why does Yoda have an ape face?

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJust Me,Pilgrim

I actually thought the Wookie-head-on-a-platter cake was supposed to be Teen Wolf. Until I recalled the theme for the day.

WV: matorye: a tomato-flavored grain used when making sauceless pasta

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMilton

I'm praying for Jacob. I hope the treatments work. Below are links to the starwars cakes my twins had for their birthday..

http://picasaweb.google.com/jrbookse/LindaSCakes#5254991701405387426" rel="nofollow">Chewbacca

http://picasaweb.google.com/jrbookse/LindaSCakes#5254991711268193138" rel="nofollow">Darth Vader

Julie

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJulie

Jacob, keep reading CW and laughing, you'll get better in no time! Sending you lots of virtual hugs from the mother of another Jacob.

Live Long & Proper...sounds so boring :-)

I love the flattened R2! Goiters...*shakes head* much more PC term than the one I originally thought of! And the Vader cake...it looks like flecked-stone spray paint I've used on decoration projects (that my husband openly despises...)...yum, if you're a Rock Biter, that is...

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterEmily

Cake 1 looks like R2 melted, and an Imperial Guard left his uniform on the floor. Why was he nekkid????

The Chewie head is in no way close to the actual Chewie. And Yoda is going to fall over anytime he tries to take a step on those legless feet, b/c he's top-heavy!

Great cakes today.
Amy B.

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAmy

Still laughing out loud at the Yoda cake. (hahahahaha!)

Also, the "Chewbacca" head cake's resemblance to Wolfman is uncanny...

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterDangGina

So jealous... er, of your SW Weekend, not of the cakes. I always wanted a SW cake for my birthday; I've been waiting since 1977, but my family has yet to think to give this Geek one. With a basement full of SW crap, you'd think they'd catch on... sigh. Well, at least I collect SW cake toppers (along with nearly everything else Star Wars).

May the Forks Be With You!

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMaureen

extra great post, today .. 'use the fork' hahaha!!!

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMuum

The best part about the Star Wars cake with the Spock tag line is that the line is wrong. It should say "Live Long and Prosper". It's missing the "s", which of course makes it even funnier.

June 12, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAmira

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