That Personal Touch
April 24, 2009 When you start a new job it's always nice to feel welcomed. This lucky individual - who may or may not be named "Steve" - got a cake:
Supposedly that reads "Greetings Coworker," but it looks more like "Exploiker" to me. Regardless, it's nice to see a little Alien Robot lingo being used in the workplace. (Back in the day I was known to bleat out the occasional "EXTERMINATE!" when talking to the "parental units," but then a friend told me I was "too carbon-based" to pull off the 'bot vibe, so I stopped.)
If there's ever a time to celebrate your individuality, though, it's your birthday:
So remember, Chris's sister: You are unique. Just like the rest of Chris's siblings.
Of course, Chris's sister is older than Chris, so what do you suppose her first three birthday cakes read? "Happy Birthday, To-Be-Determined-Upon-the-Birth-of-Our-Next-Child?"
And for those picky people who want their actual names on a cake, bakeries are now offering some handy fill-in-the-blank form cakes:
Just pick out which awkwardly worded, misspelled message you would like, write in the name of your choice using the mismatched icing tube, and voila! One personalized, heartfelt Wreck!
Generic Wreckporter, Becky F., and Carmen, thanks for all wonderful Wrecks.
Reader Comments (97)
I thought the first cake said "Spelunker" myself. Which didn't really make any better sense to me. I was totally cracking up at your commentary on the second cake though. OMG!
Looks like they recycled a St. Patrick's Day cake, too. Reminds me of the "Dexter's Laboratory" episode in which Dexter stays with an Amish family whose female members apparently have no names.
WV: phybrent -- a wrecker's version of "vibrant."
Oh my! That last cake is really wrecky! "Thanks for All Wonderfull Memories" Apparently, the memories weren't "wonderfull" enough to encourage the use of good grammar on the cake!
"EXTERMINATE!" ... "parental units" ...
You sure we didn't hang out with the same crowd in high school? ;-)
I remember going to dinner at my in laws house years ago for my Hubby's Bday. They had gotten a cake that said 'Happy Birthday Megan' (his younger sister), in pink with pink roses. It was nice. Then below that it said Happy Birthday Craig, in blue. It looked like a total after thought. I felt so bad for him.
He said it happened a lot.
"Oma" is actually German for grandmother.
@Trevor -
That what *I* thought!
It's certainly...um...curly?
Omg...poor chris's sister. :( I think it is very sad to share a birthday cake, even for a twin....but these people aren't even the same age! And then they can't even remember her name! I hope the birthday present is some cash for the therapist.
As someone whose sibling insisted upon all friends addressing me as "[name removed to protect the guilty, though I'm not sure why]'s sister" rather than my actual name, I must sympathize with Chris's sister. Mine would totally have ordered that cake if our birthdays were anywhere near each other's...
I've had shared birthday parties pretty much whenever one of my aunts is in town (two days later, and I would have been her "birthday present" :) ), but at least my family doesn't do afterthought cake inscriptions.
WV: mingl -- very appropriate for that birthday cake.
I'm glad to see that whoever got the Oma cake cared so deeply for their grandmother as to get her such a heartfelt and grammatically correct cake. *rolls eyes*
Wow, absolute unintelligible. Poor Chris' sister. Poor Grandma, who was so wonder-full.
What's the deal with the blue card beside the first cake? Dave is crossed out and replaced with Steve?! That'll sure make the new employee feel welcome...Good thing they didn't write the same thing on the cake...
Where to start? There so much, ...so much...SO MU-U-U-CH!!! Okay removing my hands from the being entangled in my hair...here we go....
How you were even able to read "co-worker" on that cake was beyond me. I tried over and over to read it before going to the cheat sheet. And I love the recycled card for Dave...no wait..STEVE!
As for the Chris's sister cake. Poor kids not only had to share a cake but most likely had to have the misfortune of having shamrocks on it year, after year .....after YEAR. ( Stop that stuff Moms out there. Let the holiday be the holiday and the birthday be the birthday)
As for the Oma cake....Tooo tooo tooooo funnn-eeee!!! Did you also catch the misspelling of "wonderfull"?
I hope Chris's sister gets her parents a cake for their 50th that says, Happy Anniversary Chris's Sister's Mom and Dad.
Angie (from over at www.HalfAssedKitchen.com)
Those are great! So I thought of your site yesterday as I was poking through the bakery at my local grocery store. There is now a "Copyright" sign up about taking photos and recreating their cakes! Hmmm...the only cakes I recreate are the ones you post here. Hmmm....
My my older sister and I were born two years and one day apart (we were supposed to be a present for my dad that he couldn't return).
Once we held a surprise birthday party for each other on the same day, in the same place.
One very confused individual was invited to BOTH parties seperately.
I think it was my mom's idea.
About the last one, if it's a "thanks for the memories" cake, it's either for a departure or, more likely in case of a grandmother, in honor/memory of her after death. Honestly, cake for a funeral? I think that's the most bizarre and hidden feature of this wreck.
PINK: THANK YOU!!! My younger brother & I have birthdays 4 days apart soon after Christmas. Not only did we have to SHARE a cake (Mom would make one sheet cake, half was for my brother, half for me) we had to suffer through shared Christmas/Birthday presents too! I guess I should be thankful that my mother didn't ever call me R's sister though!
It's not so mush the "wonderfull" i have a problem with...
but does that say "mamories"?!
I hope Chris is in charge of this friend's cake on their birthday. We'll see the cake that says "Happy Birthday Chris's Friend"
Steve suddenly was hired to replace Dave who decided mere hours before starting work that the gig wasn't for him.
And poor Oma, you'd think a grandmother who provided such memories would have grandkids that knew what to call her when ordering a cake.
The red lettering on the first cake, "greetings" is done so prettily, and then the wreck-word. wow.
"This is our daughter Dottie. ... This is our other daughter, Dottie's sister."
Very touching. It looks like the first cake just said "worker" and the "co" was added as an after thought.
I hope Chris's Sister was out getting wrecked on her 21st so she did not have to witness this one.
"Dear Oma thank you for all wonderfull memories" is kind of a weird sentiment for someone to give their Oma. It has a kind of closure or farewll feeling. Is grandma going away?
Did someone just forget "Chris' sister's" name, or what?
That last wreck is just terribly, pathetically, sad..
~Amy B
I really like that "Dave" is exxed out with "Steve!" written over it.
(Back in the day I was known to bleat out the occasional "EXTERMINATE!" when talking to the "parental units," but then a friend told me I was "too carbon-based" to pull off the 'bot vibe, so I stopped.)Are you a Doctor Who fan, by any chance (past or present)?
Regarding your firsty, I had no idea that cakes were being decorated with Sanskrit these days. The fake-looking, dramatic cross-out of Dave-I-Mean-Steve really tops it off nicely.
This is the friendly but absent-minded workplace that says, "We're nice enough to welcome you with cake, Co-Worker X, but not competent enough to get the details of your identity. So this was really just about having cake with a stranger, wasn't it?"
"And welcome!"
www.captainjackmakesport.blogspot.com
WV: saukert - Noun. Essential component of a Reuben sandwich.
So ... I'm thinking, yes, an 18th birthday IS important ... but isn't 21 a bit MORE-SO?? Wow, talk about getting shoved aside on a special day! I'm really thinking TWO cakes, but, silly me ... what do I know?
And, as for the other cake, tell me it was made somewhere where the word, "the" is supposed to be omitted?? Right?
They only invited Chris' sister to the party because she is old enough to buy them beer. Ironically enough, I'm Chris' sister too, except he's older.
That first cake is such a shame. The word "Greetings" is written so well...
It isn't the fact that they call their grandmother Oma. That's perfectly appropriate in Germanic and Scandinavian families. It's the fact that somebody decided that Oma deserved really, really hot pink for her name.
And, apparently, needed to be thanked for her mamories. 'Cause I swear that's what it says.
As for poor Chris. It could be worse. My best friend was born on Christmas day. She didn't get cake. And they took one of her Christmas pressies and wrapped it in birthday paper. 'Cause apparently her birthday wasn't that exciting. The one I feel for is Chris' sister. Must sick. Almost like being the (wife).
But I am most disappointed that there are no quotes around Oma. Shouldn't there be quotes?
Poor Chris' sister. It makes me a little mad at Chris' parents.
BOGUS!!??!!
That first "inscription" looks to me like: "Tieetings Coriloiker"
And of course they had to do that because the idiots weren't really sure WHO had actually been hired, and on top of that were too cheap to even get a fresh envelope to put the card in. I'll bet Dave/Steve/Coriloiker was instantly/rightfully worried about who the hell his first paycheck was going to be made out to.
=^!!^=
Why is there a kidney on the first cake? Poor Dave, er, Steve. And I'd really like to hear from Chris's sister.
WV: undle -- Where is Chris's sister? She's crying undle the table.
Michelle, I was reminded of that great A League of Her Own quotation, too!
"Hello I'd like to order cake for two birthdays, It's Chris's 18th birthday, and Chris's Sisters 21st birthday, her name is Emily. You got that?"
"Yes sir, one Birthday cake for Chris and Chris's Sister..."
Decorator thinks: "What a Cheapskate! can't even afford two cakes. Hey Where'd I leave that one left over from saint patty's day? Oh there it is! What did he say again? Oh ya, Chris is 18 and Chris's Sister is 21...
lol! excellent cake selection as usual.
I thought it said "congratulations" and then had an L in it somewhere... hmm...
Does that last cake say Mamories?
Sweet!!
"Oma" is also Korean for aunt, and can be used for "mom's friend." But like said before.. what a weird thing to write on a cake.
My guess for the Dave cake is that his friends bought him a cake only to find out that his sister was in town and it was her birthday too... So as to not have her feel left out they threw it on the cake.
WV: Missess - some spelling error you would see on a cake!
The icing on the first one looks like ketchup. :s
"So remember, Chris's sister: You are unique. Just like the rest of Chris's siblings."
LOL! Out of all of the hilarious things I've read on this blog, nothing has made me laugh harder than this. Priceless!!
Oma is actually DUTCH for Grandmother.
Oma is my Grandmother's name. (it also means mother in Korean, if I recall correctly). Either way, no mother, grandmother, or random person with that name needs a cake that looks like a card bought in bulk (one clearance due to spelling/grammar). Though I bet it was tasty, I mean, it is cake after all.
Oh boy! Just found your place and I'm telling you, I haven't had such a good laugh in a looong time. I cried myself trough the pages. Thank you, I'll be back =)
I think the card is the clue to the first cake - it originally said "Greetings, Dave" but then they realized his name was Steve instead of Dave. So they tried to fix it...
You sure we didn't hang out with the same crowd in high school? ;-)
I recall an incident with the PGUs which resulted in grounding for two weeks for calling them the parental carbon units. Ah the memories these cakes bring back!
Thanks for the great laugh today! Exactly what I needed to get my Friday afternoon kick-started. Too funny!