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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Thursday
Nov192009

Batter UP!


Frankly, Carianne, I don't think I can top the genius of the pun that is 'batter up', so I'll just quit while I'm ahead.

PS: Take that, Failblog.

- Related Wreckage: Freud Would Have a Field Day

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Reader Comments (163)

I'm going to rechristen this hot mess of a clover a "quatrefoil." This way, it seems almost fancy enough to command a price of $12.99 for the privilege of taking it home.

Or is that an offer of $12.99, paid if you take it away and never bring it back again?

November 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Ooh yummy! Faeces and a penis on the same cake.

John, I think the family friendly word for penis IS penis

November 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterChristine

That "bat" on the left has GOT to be a deliberate act of cake-wreckery. I mean really, there's suggestive and then there's blatant and this cake, my friends, is blatant.

November 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAshley

Meanwhile... Aside from the (oh yes they are, too!) obvious [ahem] "bats" .. IF someone did buy this moist-est cake in the world and prevailed upon some others to eat it, just how long [dear me, euphemisms do "pop up" don't they?] would it take for their teeth to return to their normal shade? There's an old film called "how green was my valley." This cake asks the question, "how green were my teeth." (Among OTHER questions, of course.)

November 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterDeborah in California

Christine (3:06)... i agree completely. we should use the proper words when talking to our kids about their awful dirty, shameful reproductive organs!
-helen

November 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

...can it get any worse?

November 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I totally just threw up in my mouth a little. I'll bet the poop is delicious, though... Oh god. Just typing that made it happen again.

November 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterRobynn

The moistest cake you've ever tasted.....Hahaha...

November 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterSarah McNair

I wanna know who put that $12.99 sticker on there! SERIOUSLY.... How do they sleep at night... I hope this ccc stays in their dreams and haunts them, I know it will me... lol!

November 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterNettie

Ohmigosh... what a way to start the day! Peckers and dog poop..yum yum!
And 'moistest'??? LMAO!

November 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterTatersmama

The moistest cake EVER? So why is it that instead of drooling, my mouth has gone completely dry?

November 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

O.M.G. This may be my favorite Cake Wreck. Or maybe I mean Cake Erect.

November 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterB Johansen Newman

At least it's moist. Bleah...

November 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterShelley Dayton

I didn't even realize those were supposed to be bats until I read the comments.

November 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterTanya

Ummm....*blinks* I think "jaw dropper" would be an appropriate description. It really looks like the resemblance to the male genitalia is intentional! Wow.

November 19, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterkatie

Nothing says baseball like a two headed *dilly* and a pickaxe made of poop...the ten pounds of green frosting is the least offensive item on this "cake".

November 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

So this reminds me about a Ron White sketch about some women who were having a bachelorette party at one of his shows, which involved a chocolate member there.

Maybe this cake was for them?

I'm hoping a lot.

November 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterSyldoran

I have something for you on my blog. Check it out!

November 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterTin Kettle Inn

Remember Pinky and the Brain? That's what first came to mind, except as the Penis and the Poo. Oh, the adventures!

-Laura

November 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

bahahahahaha. moist. ccc. poo 'bats'... *chortle*

November 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterNicole

omg, so realistic ! with dog sh*t and everything ! :U

November 19, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterredmorningstar

I'm guessing the wreckerator thinks sex should be America's national pastime instead of baseball.

November 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterBree

Actually it reminds me of the Gorn. Turn your head and you can see two bloodshot eyes, a pointy head and some mud thrown on the face by James T. Kirk.

November 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterJerry

It seriously looks like my chihuahua left some itty bitty poops on that demented four-leaf-clover. Or something like that.

November 19, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterzan

I Heart Chaos > Failblog > Cakewrecks

November 19, 2009 | Unregistered Commenter...And IHC for the win

I guess those brown things would be the male reproductive organs of turds, if turds could reproduce. I think I have to go vomit now.

November 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

A swing and a miss.

November 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

It looks like a really weird and bad 3 leaf clover. Not a baseball diamond. The key word should be DIAMOND!!!!

Debbie

November 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

LOL and it is the MOISTEST cake you've EVER tasted too. ;)

Rashelle

November 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

That "bat" on the left could not look any more like a phallus if was one. It's horrible to look at.

November 19, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterannacakes79

Okay....I think this must be the beginning of some sort of contest among cake decorators, "Can I get my cake featured on Cake Wrecks before you do?"

No way that "bat" on the left was unintentional. No. Way.

November 19, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterKristy

I don't care how moist this cake is, because between the shiny, shiny, deeply green icing and the icky brown bits that may or may not be poo (which the intensely green icing probably also tastes like), there isn't much left to love. Unless you're into eating paperboard, that is.

November 20, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

B Johansen Newman for the win!

I've laughed until I cried. Especially at the "Pinky & The Brain" thing. I'm inspired to write a parody...

The "abbreviated" version...

Penis & The Poo
Penis & The Poo
When looking for a Cupcake Cake
No other will do(o).

They're such a load of Klass
Just this shy of crass...
Someone needs to kick
The Wreckerator's ....

Penis & The Poo
Penis & The Poo
They're Penis, Penis and the Poo, Poo, Poo, Poo...

November 20, 2009 | Unregistered Commenterllama,llama not yo mama

0_0

That's about all one can say about that.

November 20, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterMelissa (& Billy)

llama,llama not yo mama -- ROFL!!! Great parody!!

Really, this cake is a KEEPER!

November 20, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterTammi

I think they drew the "realistic" looking on of the left and were cracking up like "DUDE, THAT ONE LOOKS JUST LIKE A PEN15! okay, okay NOW we have to make the other one NOT look like one so we won't get into trouble..."

and of course, the irony of it also being the "The Moistest Cake You've Ever Tasted"
priceless.

November 20, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAJ

I was going to make the crack about the cake being "the moistest you've ever tasted!" because it's no doubt "cream"-filled, but De beat me to it. Still had to comment, because...

WV: ingisms
Something that might happen on the ingfield of this cake if it's handled incautiously!

November 20, 2009 | Unregistered Commentermakingyouhungry

Is it just me or was there more time spent on the left bat than the right? Maybe these people need a picture for inspiration before they wreckorate. Have they never seen a bat? Maybe when the person thinks of a bat.....penis comes to mind,lol. Nevermind. :oP

November 20, 2009 | Unregistered Commentersleeplessnights04

Omigod, this one has made me laugh more than any other. Everyone has already said what I've thought. I only can add "Moistest cake ever"??!! BAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHHHHHHAHAHAHAHHA!!!

November 20, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Notice the sticker at the top:
"Moistest cake you've ever tasted!"

Ahem.

November 20, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

OK, so it's not just me. Seems everyone saw the same thing I did. Whew!

November 20, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Is it me, or does the less-phallic poop baseball bat also strongly resemble a pick-axe?

November 20, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterFruppi

Moist Irish penis cake, can anyone say Yummy :).

November 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

To all you commenters...ROFLMAO!!!!

November 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterShari

Is that a poo penis? Yikes?

November 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterThe Beach Life

I like how the sticker states "moistest cake" uh, with those poo/penis "bats" i really dont feel the urge to eat this cake..

Jennl

November 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I like how the sticker states "moistest cake" uh, with those poo/penis "bats" i really dont feel the urge to eat this cake..

Jennl

November 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Has anyone noticed that it is even labled, "The moistest cake you've ever tasted?" I mean come on! "tasted!" "Moistest!"..this is one cake you do not want to bring home to the parents...

November 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterYevah

I only had to tilt my head side ways to tell that they were NOT black jelly fish with radioactive uni brows and no eyes! Their tomb stones! You can really see one says RIP if you just tilt your head side ways (Or computer, I would prefer head, but its you mind. -snicker-) Any ways, its a TOMB STONE! For the death of the scribble man! Who turned into a radioactive ghost and is trying to teach the tomb stones how to spell! See what a little head tilt can do? See? Huh?

November 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I've never seen anything but a penis look more like a penis than that bat on the left... dang. What kind of nympho bakery did THAT come from?

November 21, 2009 | Unregistered CommenterAngie

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