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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Wednesday
Sep242008

Any Occasion Will Do

I'm the type who thinks cakes are good for any occasion. Apparently, so are the people who ordered these:


After all, how often do you get to congratulate someone on "completeing" their jail sentence?

Wow, that often? Ok, never mind.

(Say, are those orange things supposed to be flowers or carrots? Either way, I'd be sorely tempted to stick some plastic babies on them.)


Alright, for those of you who are being congratulated: make sure you always thank the ones with the fat checkbooks.

Yay appropriate quotation marks! And thank goodness the decorator didn't choose to take a more literal approach to a cake celebrating potty-training.


Pete and Pete's lady, this one's for you:

Frozen peas only go so far,
So Ladies, here's a tip:
Be sure to buy your man a cake
When he gets the ol' snip-snip!

Yeah, I know: I missed my calling as a traveling troubadour.

Thanks to Wreckporters Monique R., Kyla S., and Stephanie P.!

Also, in the interests of full disclosure: the Bail cake was a gag. The others are legit, as far as I know.

« The Great Cupcake Cake Debate Continues | Main | My Youngest Wreckporter »

Reader Comments (105)

First off wow! People will celebrate just about anything just for the sake of eating cake. I thought about getting a potty cake for my son when he was potty trained but figured it would have been a waste of money since I figured he would have a relapse. Which yes he did LOL.
As for the calenders I have the perfect place to have them made and sold plus the owners of this site (if they make them) gets to keep some of the profits from those who buy them. I highly encourage them to check it out:
http://www.zazzle.com/create

September 24, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterNiamh

What a great idea a cake wrecks calendar would be!! A great gift for that person who has everything!!!

Vicki

September 24, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

LOVED the vasectomy cake. I think physicians everywhere who perform vasectomies should provide the vasectomized with a gift certificate for such a cake. Or at least provide a smaller version at discharge from a surgi-center (Along with the obligatory bag of frozen peas!).
However, the decor should consist of dying or trapped spermies instead of roses. Much more symbolic and meaningful!

September 24, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterCaliGirl9

A vasectomy cake! I wish I had thought about that when hubby had the snip earlier this year! I'm notorious for cake occasions at our house (the 6 month old got a half-circle cake for his half birthday, get it?), so a vasectomy cake would have been perfect! I'm with the other poster who got her kids new undies when potty trained, but a cake would have been fun! I'll remember that for next time!

September 24, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterCarrie

OMG...one of my dearest online friends is named Pete! But he and his wife have grandkids, so it probably wasn't for him...but I wouldn't put it past his wife to get this for him ;)

September 24, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterphillygirl64

Too funny!

September 24, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterCrochet by Momma J

My mother bought a cake when I got my period. I was mortified. It said "welcome to womanhood."

September 24, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterYvonne

OK. You CRACK me up every DAY with these cakes.
hahahaha

I was thinking the same thing about the orange carrots and the babies.

heeheehee

I love this blog!

AND there's ALWAYS a good reason for CAKE!!!

September 24, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterdebbiearnn

I requested the calendars --
and I'd like to add to my order with a dozen or so Wrecks on greeting cards.

I'd like to give the nakedmohawkbabyjockeys to all my expectant friends. And hey, with today's batch, I've truly got a card for every occasion.

*sobbing* ...please, please, pretty please!?!

September 24, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I, too, want to jump on the calendar bandwagon. Let us know if you decide to do one. I would buy about 10 for my friends.

September 24, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterLaurie Laws

I am going to get one of those vasectomy cakes for my husband. What better reason to celebrate.

September 24, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterDiane

Jen ~ I am a graphic designer ... I certainly can design a "Cake Wrecks" calendar for you ...

September 24, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterDebbi

No wonder Americans are obsese!

Get out of jail?

Celebrate with cake!

Used the toilet?

Celebrate with a cake!

Voluntarily give up your fertility?

Celebrate with a cake!

When do we get so see

"Congratulations Jenny on Becoming a Woman" With all red roses and borders, of course...

September 24, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterRachael M.

I also thought of "Back to the Future" upon seeing the first cake. At least that one had an amusing illustration on it ...

September 24, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterladycrim

Hmmm - I think my hubby would agree - the chicken wings and bottle of scotch he got post-vasectomy trump the cake any day of the week! LMAO!

September 24, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterDea

I love how the vasectomy cake has a nice "pairing" of *ahem* round (some might say, "ball-shaped")blue (blue!) roses, dangling from severed little green vas deferens--I mean, rosebud--stems.

September 24, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I am totally behind the potty training cake, as well. After finally getting little Aiden on the toilet, I am sure this mom wanted some cake for herself!! (It's a long process!)

As to the vasectomy cake...We won't go there! ;-)

September 24, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterManders

holy cow.
Can't......stop.......laughing......

September 24, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterLisa

Hmmmm.. a potty training cake.. what a GOOD IDEA!! why didn't I think of this sooner?!

"Okay son... once you start using the potty.. you get CAKE to celebrate!" ...

maybe that will work? hmmmm..

September 24, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterLilBit

I loved your blog. I can't read it during the day though because I don't want to burst out laughing in court (I am the clerk) - that would be bad!

September 24, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterJulie

a cake for going potty?! are you kidding me? is there a special one for going poo-poo?? LOL

September 24, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterNMrunner

My husband recently got snipped. I feel very sad that this idea didn't come to me sooner! I guess I could say, "Congratulations on your successful vasectomy!!" HAHA! That cracked me up!

September 24, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterKrista

I feel like I've been potty training my middle child forever and I'd be more than happy to make a congrats cake for him once we're finally done :)
- Julie
(http://www.cakesandkids.com)

September 24, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

For more "quotation mark" fun you should check out:
http://quotation-marks.blogspot.com/

September 24, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterTanzie

I love your blogs, and these are some great wrecks!

because your blog is so great, I gave it some bloggie love. please visit me to see.

http://chroll.blogspot.com/

September 24, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterLa Pixie

Huh. Vasectomies, jail and potties. I'm thinking of some cake occasions I could do in my house for teen boys-

I love you! You put the seat down!

Thank you for using the same glass more than once!

You took the trash out, way to go!

Congrats! That is the laundry hamper!

We could do cake morning, noon and night here....

September 24, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterholly

I heart your blog so I gave you an award! http://thefreebiediva.blogspot.com

September 24, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterJennifer

Your blog frequently makes me laugh out loud! I just made a spectacle of myself while doing this in the Barnes and Noble cafe (where I am availing myself of the free WiFi because I still have no phone or electricity thanks to Hurricane Ike).

September 24, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterPam

Been reading the wrecks for a couple months now. Awesomely terrible wrecks. (Criticism ahead)

I'm sorry, but those quotation marks ARE appropriate because "go" is being used ironically. Remember class, what is irony? "The use of words expressing something other than their literal intention" Thank you, Mr. Bender, now finish watching Fry's Opera.

See, go being used as a euphemism for bodily evacuation and go used in the nebulous, encouraging sense. (/criticism)

Love the blog, though! :-)

September 24, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterBrainGaius

@braingaius: [scratching head] Er, I was actually celebrating the correct usage of those quotation marks when I said "Yay appropriate quotation marks!"

See, for once I WASN'T being sarcastic. ;)

September 24, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterJen

These are truly truly fantastic..great wreckporting.

September 24, 2008 | Unregistered Commentermanicpaniccomix

On the first one I read
"Congradulations
on completing
you fail sentence"
Which would also have been funny lol

September 24, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

wow... that's so appropriate to have a cake with pretty flowers on it after a vasectomy... Bet Pete feels like a REAL man now.

September 24, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterCynthia Z

A friend of mine is active in AA. At the end of each month, his group has a birthday cake for those who celebrated "sobriety birthdays" that month. When it was his turn to buy the cake, he had it read: "Happy Birthday Drunks"

September 24, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAmy

I made my son a red velvet cake when he potty trained (It was an Elmo thing)...I should have realized that one was for "Welcome to Womanhood."

My bad.

September 24, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAllergy Mom

I'm going back to see if the fireman cake might have been a better decorative background to use to bare, er, bear the vasectomy message. And does anyone think that "hose" being held by Happy Harriot on the fireman cake represents the common denominator between the jail sentence, the commode and the vasectomy? Lois

September 24, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I'm thinking these are all thematically related. See, Pete should be congratulated on the vasectomy, because now he won't have any more no-good kids who are destined to be imprisoned. Hm. Not sure how the potty fits into this, though. A little help?

September 25, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterandie

Niamh, maybe if you'd gotten your kid a cake, he wouldn't have relapsed...;)

Mine just started making it through the night without accidents. I'm thinking definitely cake worthy. =D

September 25, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterHolli

i seriously think this is the best blog of all time.

September 25, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterstephanie

Surely there are enough bad cakes out there for some sort of 'cake a week' desk calendar?

I'd buy it for sure - as long as you ship to the UK!

September 25, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterHelen

OK then.........LOL. And "completing" is spelled wrong too. All the lovely people out there decorating cakes with words who don't know how to spell.........it just cracks me up

September 25, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterSusan

I've just discovered your blog site and can I just say that I've appreciated every laugh and giggle you help to provide.
But, really, a vasectomy cake? Isn't anything sacred anymore?

Truly...let them ALL eat cake has new meaning!

September 25, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterDebbie

My husband and I got a cake to celebrate his vasectomy, but I never thought to get it personalized. Darn! Missed opportunity.

September 25, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

The jail cakes remind me of the one from Back to the Future for Uncle Jailbird Joey. ~ Evil Jim

September 25, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Ah, bruised blue roses. The perfect decoration for a vasectomy cake. especially if attached to a pair of blue blobs of icing that look like dubiously like more organs.

The first one: Was it carrot cake?

September 25, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterCalantha

oh, yvonne and amy! your comments had me cracking up!

i am having trouble getting my little boy potty trained, but when we DO get there..i'm buying a cake for ME!!

this site cracks me up! i am about to go into labor (37 weeks!)!

September 25, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I love the calendar idea. But there are so many random cake occasions! You need a page a day calendar so you can include all the new cake-worthy holidays and occasions (with witty verses and banter)!

(No, really, PLEASE? I would send them to SO many people.)

(I fully realize this takes the Cake Wreck Calendar idea out of the realistic possibility range but figured I'd run with it.)

Cakes are great as usual!

September 25, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterStephanie

O.k ditto on the whole calendar thing. You Jen, gurl, would be making money hand over fist!
Give me a heads up when you make them. (I say when because there is no "if" about that hon! You should make one.) Jen your blog rocks!

To Pam: Keep your head up babe, we're praying for you here at Riverside Chruch in New York and will be sending you guys down there some supplies and such.
Good luck!
(Free Wi-fi rules, don't it Pam!)

September 26, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterclueuin

I sent in the vasectomy pic and yes, the woman at the Stop & Shop bakery was amused at the personalization.

September 26, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterhnybny

Ok...so the bail cake was mine for my 19th birthday. I feel like I need to share the story.

As was disclosed, it WAS a gag (I was not in jail.)

I was throwing myself a birthday party and thought it would be totally egotistic to order myself a cake that said "Happy Birthday Kyla!" I couldn't possibly dream of going cakeless, so my friends and I brainstormed for the most bizarre cake wish we could think of...we finally picked after going through Dairy Queen's list of images they could ice onto the cake.

We spent much of the party taking pictures and posing behind some prison-bar chairs that I had. It definitely the highlight of the party!

As a side note, I feel like this blog inspires me to go out and purposely try to find wrecks, rather than waste my time with awesome cakes...wrecks are much more fun!

September 29, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterKyla Springall

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