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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Wednesday
Sep102008

The Cake Head Diet Aid: Killing Appetites Since 2007

We've all been there: six weeks of rigorous dieting, all ruined by the sugar-paste encrusted morsels at cousin Jill's wedding. But what is today's bride to do? Is it possible to have the wedding cake of your dreams while still showing consideration to your dieting guests?

Yes, it is!

Introducing the Cake Head Diet Aid!


That's right, folks, just place the professionally decorated Cake Head Diet Aid alongside your wedding cake. It's that easy! In addition to being a delicious red velvet groom's cake, the Cake Head Diet Aid will effectively dissuade all but your most ravenous and/or non-squeamish of guests from indulging in the gut-busting baked goods. Guaranteed!

Here's what our happy customers are saying about the Cake Head Diet Aid:

"The children ran screaming - no sugar buzzed hellions at the reception! Thank you, Cake Head Diet Aid!"

"Never have I wanted to eat cake less. Just the thought of your product has kept me up nights, and I've lost over 15 pounds!"

"When my husband said the wrong name at the altar, I was ready to kill him. Slicing into the Cake Head Diet Aid, however, helped me vent enough of that murderous rage to make it to the annulment. And the jam filling - oh, that was the best part!"

As a bonus, your Cake Head Diet Aid is completely customizable! From football helmets to sunglasses, iPod earbuds to nose rings, you can make your Cake Head Diet Aid the spitting image of your husband-to-be while incorporating his favorite hobbies!

So girls, be kind to your guests waistlines while giving your guy his just desserts: order the Cake Head Diet Aid today!

Michelle D., I bet these work great at birthdays, too.

UPDATE: Alright, all you PhotoShop nay-sayers: there IS such a thing as edible image printing, mkay? I also verified that this came off a professional bakery's portfolio site, so chill wit' da hatin' , yo.

« Don't Do It, Billy! | Main | The Painted Cake Cometh »

Reader Comments (193)

Now hang on - there's no way that's not a real head. His eyes are glinting in the camera flash! It's got to be one of those pranks where somebody sits under the table and sticks his head up through a hole. Maybe the cake decorator posted the photo to show that she could even ice real heads?

September 10, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterHolly

That is the most disturbed thing I've ever seen! I question the sanity of the Bride.

September 10, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterjencoe

Now that's just nasty!

September 10, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterCrochet by Momma J

Ah, the perfect groom's cake to go along with that wedding cake that looks like the bride!

September 10, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterladycrim

That is terrifying, the eyes are way too real. I've got goosebumps.

I should have ordered one of my ex when I got divorced - that would have so been worth it.

September 10, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterHope

i totally thought of that scene in "hanibal" when i saw this cake, creepy!
-Mary

September 10, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterMary

I don't get how people can't figure out this was edible ink?? I've seen amazing works of cake-art with the edible ink printer stuff....

The person in the picture, though, looks REALLY depressed....

September 10, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterDea

creepy cake, that's for sure!

but i can't believe all of you who are making such rude comments to our blog owner. she has proven herself already by researching as much as she can about each cake post so we have no reason to believe that she has done any less with THIS one. take thumper's advice...and if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all :)

thanks for an always enjoyable blog!!!

September 10, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterjen bryner

Ew, ew, ew! What? I think a headless helmet would suffice, don'tcha think?

September 10, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterRonnica

Cake for everyone....

Would you like the ear canal or perhaps a bigger piece of sinus cavity?

I'm partial to tounge in cheek....

September 10, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterJulie

If this is a wedding cake, why does that football player look so bummed out? He looks like someone important to him died yesterday.

Props to the decorator though. My cake decorating skills run along the lines of those wedding cake disasters posted here previously.

September 10, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterJuliet

On second thought, add some "blood" and some gruesome details and you'd probably have the most awesome Halloween cake ever. Still wouldn't eat it though. That scares me!

September 10, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterTanya

I bet they made the helmet cake and then just put a picture of his face in it.

September 10, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterMim

The only thing wrong with this is the face could stand to be a little bluer, and a pool of red icing around the base could have done wonders for the effect.

September 10, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterJason

GRRROOOOOOSSSSSSSS!

September 10, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterThe Engelhardt 4

We would not find it hard to believe that someone could paint a sculpted piece of clay to look like this, so why is is so unbelievable that someone brushed edible ink onto fondant laid onto a well-sculpted cake? The "glint" in the eyes could easily be a bit of white paint. The cartoon characters on the back of my cereal box have a "glint" in their eyes, but I'm pretty sure there isn't an actual cartoon character sticking his head through the box.

September 10, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

For a second I thought someone put their head through a hole in the table...the face looks too real! Scary!!! I wonder how much that cake would cost.

September 10, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterTSoph

frightening...

September 10, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterThe Halls

YOU CAN TELL THAT THE PERSON IS STICKING UP THRU THE TABLE AND HAS DECORATION ON HIS HEAD. THAT IS A REAL PERSON...NOT FAKE! HAHA

September 10, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterhollywoodgirl

I had to stare at that one for a while. I thought someone stuck their head through a hole in the table or something. What the !@##?

September 10, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterYénifer

Wow! And Wow! That looks so realistic that it's creepy. Hats off to the decorator for the real life head....thing, but to eat a piece of it? I don't know, it's just too weird. Why would someone commission something so not edible? Oh, I forgot. It's the DIET cake. You are so hilarious!!
(Maybe photoshop ought to have some regulations- no using it on cakes! The public gross out factor is enough reason.

September 10, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterkristin

OMG- that is awful. So disturbing, and realistic. Tell me is wasn't red velvet...

September 10, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterSouthern Family

How?
How?
How?
How did the cake decorator do that?
If that's photoshoped then the groom was gosh, darn, drunk to do that.
Ah,no I don't want a slice of that.
Thanks, but no.
Ummm, ewww.

Peace,
Clueuin

September 10, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterclueuin

Go long!!

September 10, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterManders

That made me literally LOL! Hilarious

September 10, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterCakeEater

Like someone said in an earlier comment. It is amazing how many people do not actually read the other comments or even your notes at the bottom of the blog.

http://www.photofrost.com/

The above link is for the Photo Frost which allowed you to print a photograph onto an edible surface to use in cake decorating. The cake designer took the picture, placed it at the side of the cake, and sculpted the icing for the helmet around the photo to make it looks like he was wearing the helmet.

Keep up the great work with the blog and don't get the others get you down. I hate when people try to tell blogger how or what they should blog. It is your blog and you can blog as you wish with it.

September 10, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterTeagan Blackthorne

If I had to guess, I'd say the cake behind the head is a football.

The head sorta reminds me of John Belushi.

September 10, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterGethsemane

Yeah! I found the cake and it's real from a real bakery!

sweetcreationsbysharon.com

Check out the groom cake section and it's right there. Personally I think it's a really well done cake.

I think Jen is owed an apology.

September 10, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterFondant Guy

i could never eat a cake that has a pink helmet. i'm sorry, pink just is repugnant.

September 10, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterdykewife

Is that for real?! Pretty amazing if it is! I'd eat it! HAHAHA.

Come on over to my blog for a giveaway!

September 10, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterMyCozyCreations

Hahahaha! That is seriously #@*%ed up.
The fact that it's red velvet inside...oh, good lord!
I mean, it's no worse than the life-sized bride cake...
Oh, wait. Yes it is. SO much worse.

September 10, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Check out that Sweet Creations site-- if that decapitated armadillo roadkill cake isn't a wreck, I don't know what is.

September 10, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterLarissa

This just made me not a football fan. Who in the right bloody mind would pay for this??? It'll leave ya speechless alright...

September 10, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterSeeryus Mama

That's seriously creepy and tasteless (ha). Am I the only person more interested in the apparently skunk-like object in the background? A previous poster called it a possible "skunk bum cake". Glad I wasn't at this wedding. What the heck was the theme? Redneck fantasy?

September 10, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterNeb

I love your blog and appreciate the fact that you take your personal time to find ways to make us laugh. If people don't like it, well, they could quit paying you- oh wait, they don't pay you!
(you don't have to publish this, i just wanted to encourage you!)

September 10, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterdiddlesgirl

first off, does anybody rememer the sculpted baby with the eye looking at you? there was a video of it being made. i would never have believe that such a realistic cake could be real. but, it was. so why can't this one be real? (yes, i thought head sticking through table too at first)
but, wouldn't it have been better to use grey cake with red filling ....so much more realistic... ewwwwwwww!

September 10, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterdiddlesgirl

i think the skunk in the background may be the football on the same website. or else someone went to extreme lengths to not have to eat that cake!

September 10, 2008 | Unregistered Commenterdiddlesgirl

Personally, I think it's kinda nifty... I mean... If you hated the football players in school, this way you can trash them without going to jail.

If you always wanted to BE one, you could now become a football player--at least in cake!

And, on yet another hand, if you really LIKED someone, you could put his/her image on a lifelike sculpted head cake and... well... "tongue" him/her--or at least his/her icing likeness.

There seems to be a whole untapped market for stalkers out there!

September 10, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterRobert

I'm always impressed with the research that goes into these posts to verify their authenticity. And, frankly, even if they WEREN'T researched, who cares? It's her blog! And the cakes are funny! We're just here for the entertainment value. It's not prime time TV! Unhappy Neilsen families should go watch something else.

Carry on, Jen. And thank you. :)

September 10, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterMichelle

LMAO yeah, that armadillo is TOTALLY wreck-tastic!!!

September 10, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterDea

My first thought was: I sure hope it was not for a funeral.....

September 10, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterNicole

Is this to train children into cannibalism? Who baked this thing, Idi Amin?

September 10, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterJorge Patiño

Makes me wonder: if you cut it up, will you find some kind of "sweet chestnut spaghetti"-type brain inside?
Note to all the Salome commenters: According to a couple of archaeologists I know John the Baptist in all likelihood did not wear football gear.

September 10, 2008 | Unregistered Commenteravocadohead

Blech, just looks a little too real.... (shudder)

September 10, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterKahla

In all seriousness, if I would have had something in my mouth when I saw that cake, it would have been all over the computer screen!

Seriously?!?

September 10, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterJennifer

...At least he doesn't have any zits.

September 10, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterMonster

This is the perfect cake to serve on movie night - if you happen to be watching "The Philadelphia Experiment" that is...

September 10, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterDeborah Godin

I think it's funny!!!

September 11, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterK2

ok- the foot cakes, pregnant tummy cakes, and baby cakes didn't throw me, but this i find creepy as hell. *shudders*


i'd still eat it tho heehee

September 11, 2008 | Unregistered Commenteronionpencil

Why sans chin?

And yes all photo cake images printed with an edible inkjet printer on potato starch paper have been around for years:

http://www.cakedecorating4fun.com/ediblecakeimages.php

September 11, 2008 | Unregistered CommenterMatt Horn

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