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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Wednesday
Jul142010

The Amazing Adventures of Spiderman Head

Last week, we left our courageous cranium in the grips of the Evil Dr. Irving Expector Ant and his band of Belliger Ants. Will our hero escape? Or will the city of Metropolis be overrun with outrageous outlaws most...malignANT? Let's find out, as we continue with...

The Amazing Adventures of Spiderman Head!!!

BUM BUM BUUUUMMM


Ant minion #1: "Haha! We've got you now, Spiderman Head!

Dr. Expector Ant: "Yes, and when we're through with you, there won't be any body for the police to find! Mwahaha! Right, boys?"

Ant minion #2: "Well, obviously, boss. He doesn't *have* a body."

Dr. Expector Ant: "Silence! I kill you!!"

Ant minion #3: "Um. So...is now a good time to ask for a promotion?"

Ant minion #1: "Hey, where'd Spiderman Head go?"



Dr. Expector Ant: What?!? He's escaped?
Noooooooo!!

Meanwhile, our bravely balancing brain bowl bounced his way to freedom!

"My trusty spider-bot ought to crash their party. Ha! So long, ignorANTS!"


With the persistent pest population handled, Spiderman Head heads home for some much-needed family time:

"G'nite, Mom, g'nite, Dad!"

"Goodnight, Son."

"G'nite, Uncle Sherb!

"Uncle Sherb?

"Da-aad! I think we brought the football in instead of Uncle Sherb again."

"Don't worry, son, we'll get him out of the yard in the morning."

Little did Spiderman Head know that his brother Sherb was NOT in the yard, but rather in the grips of the maniacal madman, Monochromatic Max!

"Aaaauuugh!! Help me, Spiderman Head!"

Will our noteworthy noggin' notice his brother's absence in time?!? Or will Uncle Sherb be doomed to a colorless demise?

Tune in next week for the thrilling continuation of...

The Amazing Adventures of Spiderman Head!!

Thanks to Wreckporters Tim H., Stephanie Z., Margaret R., Carolina D., & Amy H. for helping me get ahead.

Update from john: Spiderman Head is the Amazing Spider-Man's nephew. In an act of teenage angst, he de-hyphenated his name and moved to Metropolis where he currently works with Super-Man Head.

« Wrecks Without Question | Main | Phonics Phailures »

Reader Comments (123)

Is that cookie moldy? Just ick.

July 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterChef Runner

That was hilarious! Thanks for the morning laugh.

Meg R.

July 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Wait...so Spidey has an Uncle Sherb and an Uncle Sherm?

July 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAmy

The cupcakes with the football kind of reminds me of that Sesame Street song - "One of these things is not like the other, one of these things is not the same..." lol! Crazy!

July 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterBecky

So is Spiderman Head and ants a new prevalent cake design out there? These cakes are crazy...but why are the first two identical in design?

I will stay tuned for the next thrilling episode. Ba-Ba-Bum.

July 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterLindalou

HAHAHAHA! Dr. Expector Ant has been learning from Achmed.

"Bravely Balancing Brain Bowl" I must find a way to use this in a sentence this week.

July 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterThe Black Dog

Dr. Expector Ant?? OMG, you just made me to a SPIT take!! LOL!!

July 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJenniffer

Great post! I'm sensing an instant classic!

July 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Bonus points for the Achmed the Dead Terrorist quote!!!

Anyway, there's no spiderman head on the second cake (he escaped, remember?). I think the cake design is just "ants stealing a cupcake" and the first one just happened to be a spiderman-head cupcake...

July 14, 2010 | Unregistered Commentermotherbynature

Awesome!

wv: idesse. Don't give wreckerators any more bad idesse.

July 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterCakey Goodness

Does it make me a geek if I read the whole thing with the movie announcer guy's voice in my head? Thanks for the laugh, you're absolutely brilliant!

July 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJessa

Kudos for the annoying, affected and awesome alliteration.

-French Bean

As a comic book geek I feel I must point out that Spider-man does *not* reside in Metropolis. Spider-Man patrols New York City and the surrounding environs. Superman lives in Metropolis.

After that... hilarious.

July 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterStressfactor

I enjoy the Achmed reference.

July 14, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterthe mama

I hope this isn't another Epcot, but... isn't Metropolis the city for Superman? Spidey hearts NYC!

Love it when you tell a story using cake wrecks :)

July 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

That is some great writing! You should turn it into a comic book and release it. ;)

Teresa
simplyenduring.blogspot.com

July 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterTeresa

OMG, I laughed and laughed. The first one is ants at a picnic - thank you for the second one to explain that. Why the football, did they run out of flotsam?

July 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

You know, the stories you write to connect all the wrecks really make it work. I like!

July 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJenn

"Silence! I kill you!"

I love that Dr. Expector Ant is channeling Jeff Dunham's Achmed, the Dead Terrorist. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=umpdfYuVwmQ

July 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterLili

I kind of like the ones with the ants stealing the cupcake (not sure how Spiderman fits in, though).

July 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterEG

I can't wait for the next installment of Spidey head. Should be worth the wait.

July 14, 2010 | Unregistered Commenterteri

Monochromatic spidey is just gross. They couldn't spring for the extra icing to actually ice the ENTIRE cake? Eeeewwwww.... it makes the other ones, surprisingly, seem professional. Bodiless and all!

July 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterBryna

I am speechless!!!! (In a good way!)

July 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterConnie Moreno

*slow clap*

Awesome!

July 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterVicki

You almost made me snort Dr Pepper out my nose! This was great. :)

July 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMy Genes Are Crafty

Who knew that Achmed the Dead Terrorist moonlighted as Dr. Expector Ant? Love the reference! Weird how Spidey heads are so popular ... *scratching head*

Love your site,
Rachel

July 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterRachel T.

Oh, my gosh. Those were the best names of all time! I just lol'd so much! Your attention to the little details is amazing--you're so ped-ANT-ic, in the best way psosible =D

July 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAmanda

So, um, not to call you out as being less geeky than you imagined...But, Spiderman lives in New York City. Superman lives in Metropolis. Although, perhaps your point was that Spiderman Head lives in Metropolis? Anyway, it was totally hilarious. Great story.

July 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterBabsiegirl

oh the hilarity! My 4 year old loved it.

July 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterLittle Lovables

He not only had an Uncle Sherb and Sherm, but apparently a brother Sherb as well. Who knew? And he lives in Metropolis not New York? Total weirdness haha

Jeff

July 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

ROFL!!!

July 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

Love the Achmed the Dead Terrorist reference!

July 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJulia

Spider-Head!
Spider-Head!
He's a spider and a head!

July 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterFanboy Wife

This was really funny! You had me chuckling as I read this, especially the first part. That was pure genius.

However, I do feel obligated to finally point out that correctly, there's a hyphen in his name. It's really supposed to be Spider-Man. But that's just a tiny little detail.

Personally, I can't wait for the next episode of "Spider-Head!"

July 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterTrevor

This definitely goes in my Top 5 Favorite Cake Wrecks Posts Ever!

July 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterRebekah

References to Achmed the Dead Terrorist, the Waltons, and The Fly all in one post. Brilliant!

Hate the ants on the cakes. We had one at our Albertson's store. Ants on watermelon CCC. Patooie!

Sharon's Edible Art

July 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterSharon

Love the Achmed the Dead Terrorist quote - I wonder if there are any Achmed wrecks out there....hint hint...

July 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterTammy

The ants on a picnic blanket is a cute idea, but the Spiderman Head is very out of place. Either way, I love the Achmed reference! "A-C-phleeegm"

July 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterKelly

I just thought I'd let you know, Cake Wrecks brightens my day every time you post. I really enjoy this blog... and Epbot is great as well for my geeky, girly fill. :)

Thank you for doing what you do!

-Laura

July 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterLaura

Ants? On a cake. That is supposed to be eaten. Ewwwww.

July 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterBub

Great way to weave a story, Jen! (you got it, right - WEAVE)

BTW, Sherb transmutated to Sherm in the last paragraph. Might want to clean that up.

July 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterEsty

The Ant comments reminds me so much of the Xanth series.

July 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterJen

every post is funny. every cake is horrific. this post shows why you are a blogger on another level. Truly great humor writing and glorious display of geekiness! much love!

July 14, 2010 | Unregistered Commenteranawinston

I like that Dr. Expector Ant is also a dead terrorist...

July 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterRenny

Gray frostiong for spiderman?

LOL, please, just don't bother next time.

July 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterMary Connealy

All the Ant words remind me of Xanth novels by Piers Anthony, a fantastic read if you got the Ant jokes! And I loved the anouncer voice, I did the same thing for my bestfriend's bachelorette party, it's a superhero theme! lol. Keep up the great work!

July 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAnonymous

I'm thinking you had A LOT of fun writing that post. I certainly had fun reading it! Nice work!

July 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterCarley

Spider-Head!
Spider-Head!
Fights a terrorist who is dead!

Lives in New York!
Not in Met-
tropolis
Yeah, you bet!

Hey, look out!
Ants stole the Spider-Head!

WV: persi - persiAN ice cream is my new favorite thing in the world! (Well, it is)

July 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterKate Halleron

wow these cakes are simply awesome. How can anyone make cakes so beautiful

http://www.languagestand.blogspot.com" rel="nofollow">Learn Italian

July 14, 2010 | Unregistered CommenterAli

Dr. Expector Ant = Achmed? Ach! Say it ain't so! Spider Man Head is in trouble!!! He might laugh to death.

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