Tuesday
Jul132010
Phonics Phailures
July 13, 2010 When "sounding it out" goes horribly, hilariously wrong.
"Good By Kathleen." As opposed to 'Bad by Wreckerator,' I guess.
"Don't Techno For An Answer"Especially when Polka is much more effective.
Aw, they always were joined at the hip.
"Ay, lass, nao A'm off to tend me wee bairns!"(Don't worry; I have no idea what I just wrote, either.)
Hey, just for fun, try adding in a bad connection to your Phonics phone order. Why, you never know WHAT you might get!
Can you guess what the order was?[humming Jeopardy theme]
Give up?
It was supposed to read, "Goodbye, farewell, now get out!"
And finally, a Wreck that pays tribute to my very own Sunshine State:
"Fair Wiell Dan
In Joy Florida!"
Huh. I think I knew a girl named Joy Florida once.
[clearing throat] Um. Not that that has anything to do with this cake, of course. Heh. Aheh. Yeeeah.
[checking watch]
So...
What do you say we get to the credits now?
Thanks, Fernando, Dori K., Wayne H., Todd K., Tammy B., & Judith B.. That almost got awkward there.
Also, you guys ever notice that the name Phonics is super ironic? You know, since you can't actually sound out the word for sounding out words? Just curious.
Reader Comments (70)
not only can I not figure out why you don't techno for an answer (Maybe I"m being dense), but why does that cake have crayon candles on it? Inquiring minds.....
...should probably learn it's best not to ask.
I don't know. I think "Don't techno for an answer" is pretty good advice.
Good bay.
Just when you thought it couldn't get any better, "Don't techno for an answer" comes along. Best wreck ever!
You don't know what you just said? Well I do (after all, this frog learned to speak Enlish by watching Buffy and by having a Scotish Nanny).
"Ay, lass, nao A'm off to tend me wee bairns" would roughly translate to:
"Yes girl, now I'm off to ake caire of my small cubs (or my little ones; it depends whether you mean animals or kids). ;P
"hoo-ked on p-honics...work-ed for ME!" - Brian Regan.
"Don't Techno" sounds like it might be a similar accent as "Under Neat".
Perhaps "don't techno for an answer" was supposed to be "Don't take 'no' for an answer"? Or else it was just someone (like me) who really doesn't like that type of music!!
As for the rest... oy gevalt!!
I think the person who ordered "Don't Techno" is the same one who ordered "Under Neat". They need to start writing things out instead of calling it in. :)
The last one kills me: "Fair well"? "In joy"? REALLY?
I am sooo glad you provided translations. One would never no nohow what the H*** they were saying. Norine
I think that possibly there may be a need to have non-native speakers who get bakery jobs pass certain tests before they are allowed to do the writing part of cake decorating...... But that's probably just because I teach ESL.
However, if someone actually added the correct comma to the direct address (which almost never appears on even your Sunday Sweets cakes, I might add, making them still technically wrong), that one cake is still pleasant: "Good Look, Eileen" could be used to tell her that her new hairstyle is a winner. Okay, well, I'm stretching it here, but it is better than some of those others.
I actually have the album "Don't Techno for an Answer". It's a techno compilation album (actually, it's a series).
lol love to see people write in a scottish accent but as for you not a knowin what ye sayd lass Ah can nah believe dat. Keep em' comin. (YES I did spell that all how it sounded when I said it feel free to laugh)
Drumnate, I think you may be on to something.... I had no clue and after thinking about it, it probably was meant to say, "Don't take NO..." rather than, "Don't techno..."
This and the Florida cakes, I think, are todays weiners.. I mean wynters.. I mean winners..
Perhaps Dan's cake was a message from the well driller putting in his sprinkler system:
Fair Well (not a good well, but a fair one)
In Joy Florida (a suburb of Celebration FL, perhaps)
On the other hand, some of these have such bad handwriting that you can't expect decent spelling.
Fair, well Dan in Joy Florida??? I think that belongs with the previous day's "naughty wrecks" :)
You know, I've played a lot of Mad Gab, but that "Good Bay Sher Well Know Getout" blew my mind. (And is it just me, or does the 'G' look like the type of 6 you see on a digital clock?)
Somehow, I am reminded of those old "hooked on phonics works for me!" commercials...these Wreckers obviously never took those courses. --.--"
-French Bean
It amazes me that you've had this website up for so long, yet there are still so many cakes wrecked every day! There should be a public service announcement along the lines of the old "The More You Know" ones...
"Don't Techno for an Answer" must be the motto of several of the tech help lines I've called.
WV: kunplayi, as in "Someone's singing, Lord, kun-pla-yi."
All I can do is laugh. In Joy Florida. Bwahahaha!
Too bad about Wayneengreg because the handwriting is pretty.
I think "Don't techno for an answer" might be my new favorite wreck, since I enjoy quite a bit of techno music.
Anyone watching Bonnie Hunt? Cakewrecks was just mentioned. woopwoop!
Anyone notice the wrist bracelet on techno cake? Between the crayons, and the bracelet, maybe prison bakery?
mocking
"Ay, lass, nao A'm off to tend me wee bairns!"
Scottish translation; Yes young lady, now I am going to take care of my little children. (I learned this from Star Trek actually))
Wow - really? Were the decorators still hung over from the night before?
King of reminds me of when you try to read English that was translated from a Chinese.
ROFL!! SO glad my cuppa was done today.
oh -- and what's wrong with sounding out pahonixs? Just wondrin.
Egads.. I canna do it. That last line just killed me.
~~Di
"Techno for an answer" . That is the best. EVER.
That life's a faught there is nae doubt,
A steep and slipp'ry brae,
And wisdom's sel', wi' a' its rules,
Will aften find it sae.
The truest heart that e'er was made
May find a deadly fae.
And broken aiths and faithless vows
Gi'e lovers mickle wae.
When poortith looks wi' sour disdain,
It frights a body sair,
And gars them think they ne'er will meet
Delight or pleasure mair.
But though the heart be e'er sae sad,
And prest wi' joyless care,
Hope lightly steps in at the last,
To fley awa' despair.
It's the MAD GAB "sweets" version! "Ice Mail Ask Hunk" I love this game, and coming soon, gluten-free & low-fat versions.
In joyed today's cakes. Phonics is our friend, but so is spelling things out that you want on a cake!
As a woman named Kathleen, I can tell you that the first cake was sent from the future, and it celebrates a book I'm going to write, titled "Good". A little punctuation may have made this more obvious.
It's a darn shame that these are sooo wrecky--Waynengreg's cake looks delicious!
I think whoever did the "goodbye 'farewell'/get out" cake did so because they wanted all of that ganache and strawberry goodness for themselves. OM NOM NOM
And I'm shocked--shocked, I tell you!--that someone spelled Eileen right. But the cake...well, as that great philosopher, Maxwell Smart would say--"Missed it by THAT much!" XD
haha I wish the "techno" cake was a little more colorful.
I think I'm most disturbed by the fact that the last one seem to have two bright red bell peppers on the side...
As I'm looking at the site, and actress named Busy on The Bonnie Hunt Show mentioned it. You're famous!
As a first grade teacher, I translate these too well :)
-AJ
Actually, children learn that "ph" together makes the "f" sound from a very early age now, so it would be appropriate to expect them to be able to sound out the word "phonics"!
Sometimes you can't Techno for an answer 'cuz ther line is always bizy!
Yup, that was intentional....
But I still have to worry about the garbage truck seen in Pennsylvania that claimed to do "Municiple" waste removal. In big bold letters!!loach
Epic-ly, awesomely, dreadfully bad. Honestly, does becoming a cake decorator require checking one's brain at the door??
Erin
aka http://haveyourcakeandreadittoo.blogspot.com/" rel="nofollow">Baker-Writer Extraordinaire
Silly peeps, while your Scots is otherwise commendable, us Brits know that the Good Look cake is clearly from Yorkshire. So really it's "Ey up, lass, A'm aff t' see m' wee chooks."
As for the Good bay, Sher well cake...mind blown. Even more so now I've noticed the peppers.
I can't hear (even in my head!) a Scottish accent now without thinking of David Tennant, Dr. Who # 10. {sigh} Thank you, Eileen, whoever you are, for having an occasion to have a Wreck created so I could think of David Tennant.
Hooked on phonics worked for me
"Don't techno for an answer" sounds like something you'd see on a t-shirt at Hot Topic or something.
And the Waynengreg cake looks so tasty, too. T'is a pity it's illiterate.
In the Goodbye, Farewell, Now Get out cake those strawberries are glazed to within an inch of their life. At first glance I was wondering why the hell they put red peppers on the cake!
this post reminds me of an old Phonics joke...
the one where a kid is overheard at a zoo yelling,
"Look mom! A Freakin' Elephant!"
(the sign reads: African Elephant)
yeah... maybe those bakers should go back to 1st grade ;)
Don't TAKE No for an Answer.
I knew the comments section would clear up my confusion.
I couldn't get it.
Can we get "Don't Techno for an Answer" on a shirt? With strobes and/or glowsticks? That would be seriously awesome.
On a side note...as long as you're pointing out the irony of not being able to sound out the word phonics, ever wonder why abbreviation is so long?
It's just like MadGab, my favorite game! I called mt husband in so we could play. When you say them out loud it all starts to make sense.
I think Cakewrecks and MadGab should put out a special cakey edition!