And Now, A Demon Dog For A Five-Year-Old

Iiiiit's Hump Day, minions!

Isn't that great news, "Demon Dog For A Five-Year-Old?"

::gutteral snarling::

Aw, I guess he can't hear me over all the screaming.

Actually, looks like it's been a pretty rough week all 'round for 5-year-old girls:

Can YOU say, "creepy anatomical inaccuracies?"

No?

'Cuz I'd like demon dog back, please. [shudder]

***

If I told you someone ordered "Congratulations Cub Scouts, Pack 47" on a cake, which of those words do you think most likely to be misspelled?

AHA!
You guessed wrong.
(I'm guessing.)

It is, in fact, every word except that one:

"Club Scott Pac 47."

[salutes]

*****

Two wrongs may not make a right, but two rights DEFINITELY make this wrong:

[give it a second]

You'll gladly foot the bill for that one, though, after I show you this:

SOMEONE CALL DEMON DOG!

Thanks to Donne G., Leah S., Maura M., Anony M., & Diana M. for the womb with a view.

*****

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And from my other blog, Epbot:

Sexy Tractors & Pancake Dogs

It's Quirky Country Music Song Titles Day, minions, and if ever there was a holiday to celebrate with Cake Wrecks, this is it.

Can you guess which of these songs are real, and which ones I just now made up while giggling madly?

LET'S FIND OUT.

"My Dog Told You So"

You said he's just a mutt
But now you're on your butt
Don't gimmie no lip, 'cuz
My dog told you so

*****

"She Thinks My Tractor's Sexy"

She thinks my tractor's sexy!
It really turns her on
She's always starin' at me
While I'm chuggin' along

*****

"You're The Reason Our Kids Are Ugly"

You're the reason our kids are ugly, little darling!
Oh, but looks ain't everything
And money ain't everything
But I love you just the same

*****

"Hold My Beer And Marry Me"

I'm drunk
Ohh whoa whoa
Drunk in love
You're all I'll ever want
So hold my beer
And marry me

*****

"Dropkick Me, Jesus"

Dropkick me, Jesus
Through the goalposts of life!
And over end neither left nor the right
Straight through the heart of them righteous uprights
Dropkick me, Jesus
Through the goalposts of life

****

"If You're Lookin' For Lovin' Don't Sit On Her Dog"

That cushion made a yip
It was my one-way ticket trip
If you're lookin' for lovin'
Don't sit on her dog!

Thanks to Lisa Marie, Fiona, Sarah Z., Elizabeth C., Kelli M., & Jan W. for helping me fool John with at least one of these. How'd the rest of you do? :D

*****

Do you shop Amazon? Then how about clicking through my affiliate link to shop? USA, UK, Canada.

 Visiting Amazon through those links will help support the site, and costs you nothing. Thanks, guys!

And from my other blog, Epbot: