My Other Blog

What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen

Friday Favs 9/23/16

Some of my favorite new submissions this week:


It was Talk Like A Pirate Day this week, but I think this bakery could have used less talking and more map-drawing:

When in doubt, add more arrows.


Julie asked for "boyish colors and decorations."

So you saw it here first, folks: Clown poop is officially "boyish."
And a "decoration."


Every time I complain about an insane icing-to-cake ratio, the pro-icing peeps come out of the woodwork, exclaiming that no amount of icing is TOO much icing.

Aiiight, you pro-icing-ers, consider this the gauntlet being thrown:

Is THIS enough icing for ya?


Kasey asked for a cake that said "Happy Birthday," and then in parentheses, "Mulan was here."

You'd think the parentheses curve-ball would trip them up, but no, that was the one thing they really nailed:

There's just nothing in it.


They say it's officially Fall.
I don't believe it.
They say Pumpkin Spice makes everything better.
I don't believe it.
They say this is a pumpkin:

[head tilt]

Eh, seems about right.


Thanks to S.E., Julie A., Kristina J., Kasey R., & Sarah C. for agreeing with me that Pumpkin Spice Oreos is the line, and that line HAS BEEN CROSSED TOO FAR.


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« Sunday Sweets: Flights of Fancy | Main | The Beach Is Terrible And These Bakers Know It »

Reader Comments (43)

Well, the ratio looks right to me, but it also looks to be that gawd-awful whipped "icing" so I'm still gonna go with nope.

September 23, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterAngelaS

…………… H. B.??? Oh!

September 23, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterShirley

Sometimes I wonder, when I cake wreckorator does something incredible, if they think "Boy, is this customer crazy!"

September 23, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterLady Anne

Boyish decorations = anemic triangles and random tip dots.

My son's going to be sooooo disappointed.

September 23, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterKimS


No it isn't.

Because I can still see some cake is why.

Proud Pro-icing Peep

September 23, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterBea

Correct amount of icing is n+1.
Moar icing!

September 23, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterXena

Pumpkin Spice Milano cookies was the step too far for me.

September 23, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterMiss Tree

So. They stripped Happy Birthday down to "H.B." and then they were just too stupid to put what was supposed to be in the parentheses INTO the parentheses.

Some people do not deserve to live, let alone be in business.

September 23, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterAisha

That pumpkin must be related to Spookley the Square Pumpkin. Cindy the Cylindrical Pumpkin?

September 23, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterMaryD

I have no words for the cakes, but today's sidebar ads... "bootylicious backside in just 2 weeks" and bust enlargement pills (for a gal with more than enough endowment on both accounts) has me giggling madly!

P.S.... I usually scrape ALL the icing off... so EWWW!

September 23, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterMelC

"Enough icing for ya?"

If it's buttercream we're talking about...

... and if it's made with powdered icing sugar we're talking about...

... and if it's the right side we're talking about...

... then just by eyeballing it, I'd say it definitely needs more.

September 23, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterSharon

I'm feeling three new cavities just by LOOKING at that icing cake! Ugh, can someone say "sweet overload"?

September 23, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterLaura P.

@MelC Can I have all your scraped-off icing in perpetuity throughout the universe pleeeeease??? (puppy dog eyes.. )

September 23, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterBea

The step too far for me was when I saw Tuesday in The-Store-Which-Must-Not-Be-Named a display stating "Great Stocking Stuffers!" REALLY? It's fricking September!!! Also, if I'm obsessed enough to buy Christmas gifts this early, do you really think I'd buy them in a grocery store?!? And I thought the stores were pushing Halloween aggressively this year!

Is it just me or is this as crazy as I think?

September 23, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterSaraCVT

Are "nipple eyes" the next big thing?

September 23, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterVictoria

oh geez, I am not a frosting/icing fan personally - typically look for the piece with the LEAST amount when I can get it. That pile of icing makes my teeth hurt, providing it's not just a can of shaving cream swirled on a cake.

September 23, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterAddie

I love how they missed the parenthesis and put quotation marks around "Mulan was here." So close.

September 23, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterStacey

That's a lot of icing... but I am not saying that I wouldn't eat it... :)

September 23, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterFelix

The boyish decorations put me in mind of snakes and snails and puppy dog tails - no, looking again they just appear to be random icing blobs.

September 23, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterAllegra

RE: Pirate Cake - at least all of the words were spelled correctly and in relatively nice cursive writing! (Although the wreckerator needs some practice in consist piping skills.)

September 23, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterGeekyGrandma

Just give me the tub of icing and a spoon and all is good.

September 23, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterJacqueline

That too much icing cake looks like they messed up one design, then decided to ice it over and try something else.

September 23, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterErica

As a mom of two boys under 10; yep clown poop is THE most boyish decoration on that cookie.

September 23, 2016 | Unregistered Commentertonya

I am not a fan of lots of icing. About 1/4" or less is the right icing depth for me. That icing pile monstrosity nearly made me gag. I can't even look at it. So gross. x_x

Meanwhile, I thought that last cake was the pokemon Psyduck at first glance. I still think it looks more like that than a pumpkin... :P

September 23, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterMerida Ann

Any guesses of what they were attempting to depict with that much icing? It looks like modern art from the cake vs. icing angle. :)

September 23, 2016 | Unregistered Commentermillbrit

So those parenthesis.... that outline... I see...*waggles eyebrows*winkwinknudgenudge* ....oh, just me? Ok... *sigh*

September 23, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterKati

I'm totes a pro-icing-er and........ you win.
But MOSTLY becuauae I can tell it's really not good icing...

September 23, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterCarrie

"Decorations" :/

September 23, 2016 | Unregistered Commentermindy1

Are you sure that doesn't have a layer of icecream on top of the cake? It looks more "solid" than the whipped stuff on the edges and top.

September 23, 2016 | Unregistered Commenter4katnap

I can't stop staring at that frosting heap. So many questions come to mind: How big of a sugar puddle would it make if it melted? Can you torch the outside to make creme brule? And how is it still standing?? It seems to be defying the laws of physics...

I thought those parentheses were a toilet seat. I can understand the boy one.... if the decorators never met one.... maybe they're space aliens? And I have never seen a pumpkin with poop on its head and boobs for eyes. Perfect.

September 23, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterNaughty Nautilus

WELL, Mulan COULDN'T be there. It says, "WAS" on the cake....meaning that she went to lunch, or had to use the bathroom, or took a walk, or found a REAL job. Jen's right: This is the most correct (albeit dopey) of them all.

September 23, 2016 | Unregistered Commentersendingtheclowns

I'm pretty sure that I'm going to be the only one that thinks "Mulan was here" was in reference to her birth between those parentheses. Although since she was a Disney character you're basically looking into the imaginative depths of Disney employees instead of the real thing. *gulp*

September 23, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterMari




*mashes his face into the icing heap*

September 23, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterKai Lowell

Ugh the "whipped topping" icing is not icing in my book! That stuff is nasty!

September 23, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterAmy

1. Yoda is a cake decorator now?
2. Ew, just ew. Bad color combination + bad decorating.
3. I'll just have a slice from the bottom layer please. The icing on the side is enough for me.
4. A really nice cake til they wrote on it.
5. A fondue monster?

September 23, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterThor

I've seen it all -- poo wangs and pumpkin boobies.

September 23, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterZippy

The boyish decorations made me think of the buttons on a game controller. So yes, they may have been fine. Not so fine is that massive mountain of icing. Ick. Good, homemade icing is one thing, but that whipped goop from grocery store bakeries just makes me gag.

September 24, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterNobodee Home

Oh man lol these are hysterical. They couldn't even manage to write happy birthday but managed huge parenthesis lmao.

September 24, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterArlene Marie

That "pumpkin" cake looks like Donald Trump.

September 24, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterJay

I virtue I see in that amount of icing is that when you slice a bit of cake and put it on the cake the eater can fold the icing part over onto the cake part and have "enough" icing on every bite.
However, I too am puzzled as to what the cake was supposed to represent (the Alps in spring, perhaps) and it does indeed look more like whipped topping than butter cream, which, while lighter, would not be my thing either.

September 24, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterAlison in Indiana

Am I the only one hoping this week's Sweets are completely without icing? I feel so sure there must be awesome things you can do with just cake. C'mon, bakers, prove me right!

September 24, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterAA

*dives face-first into the frosting cake*

September 25, 2016 | Unregistered CommenterNathan R.

That reminds me of when I worked at a fast food chain. We had a customer come in and ask for extra ketchup on his burger and even stated "You can't add enough ketchup". Well that ended up being a challenge for one guy I worked with and the burger required a box not a wrapper. The next night the same guy came through with the same order because he finally got what he ordered. So the customer may have made that request of tons of icing and someone else at the party may have had the problem with so much icing.

October 1, 2016 | Unregistered Commenterrhonda

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