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What's a Wreck?

A Cake Wreck is any cake that is unintentionally sad, silly, creepy, inappropriate - you name it. A Wreck is not necessarily a poorly-made cake; it's simply one I find funny, for any of a number of reasons. Anyone who has ever smeared frosting on a baked good has made a Wreck at one time or another, so I'm not here to vilify decorators: Cake Wrecks is just about finding the funny in unexpected, sugar-filled places.

Now, don't you have a photo you want to send me? ;)

- Jen
Friday
May152015

Friday Favs 5/15/15

Some of my favorite new submissions this week.

 

If you have a daughter named Brandon, guess what you get asked the most?

I'm kind of loving the piping gymnastics the baker had to go through to fit all that on there. Do you think at any point she stopped to wonder... ?

Naaaah.

 

Uh, guys? Did I miss something? Are brain cakes for babies a thing now?

Because the pics of little Toby covered in red cake gore are seriously not safe for life.

 

Believe it or not, though, that's not the wreck. See, someone else wanted a cake just like that for their baby... but instead they got this:

It looks like a big mushy ball of Mac n' Cheese. Which, let's be honest, is WAY BETTER THAN BRAIN CAKES FOR BABIES, mmkay? Yeesh.

Ok, maybe the brain cake is too divisive of an issue.

So can we at least agree that THIS is wrong?

"Icing shots?!" With no cake?? FOR $2.00??

Whaddaya mean, you like that much icing? Are you INSAAAANE?

(Side Note: anyone else distracted by the "Dry Old German Chocolate" sign? I was about to be impressed by their honesty before I realized it's supposed to be "Day." Heh.)

Well, in the interests of minion harmony, let's end with a classic:

A birthday cake with "a big number 2 and stars on the sides."

I guess there wasn't room to write "stars" on both sides.
Shame.

 

Thanks to Jennifer B., Amanda N., Kathleen, K.T. for bringing us only the second-best stars.
P.S. If you're not following both The Bloggess and yours truly over on Twitter, then you're missing out on some riveting intellectual interactions, like this:

*****

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Reader Comments (56)

It's wrong for a baby, but I would not mind a brain cake myself.

May 15, 2015 | Unregistered Commentermindy1

Excuse me, does that baby have TATOOS?????

May 15, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterShirley Fowley

You know, when a cake order asks for a "big old number two on top, with stars on the side," you're lucky all you got was that.

May 15, 2015 | Unregistered Commenterkhereva

Icing Shots for $2?!?!? To coin a phrase from the old lady from the Wendy's commercials..."WHERE'S THE CAKE???"😜😝😁

May 15, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterBigg3469

Can mayonnaise shots be far behind?

May 15, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterSuBee

Geez Toby has a lot of tattoos! Hope they're temporary. Love the confused look on the kid's face.

May 15, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterJodi

At least in the last cake, "you're" is spelled correctly...if you count the smear at the right side of the u an apostrophe, that is!

May 15, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterGirlNamedCorrie

Jodi - yeah, I'm with ya there. The tattoos on a baby are more disturbing than the brain cake.

May 15, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterHAL

I totally thought that said "DIY Old German Chocolate"! I was very confused!

May 15, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterHaley

The reports of The Bloggess's death are greatly exaggerated.

May 15, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterAthena

That puzzled look on Toby's face makes it all worthwhile.

And yes, I can appreciate the beauty of and need for icing shots. YUM!

May 15, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterTLC

My friend LOVES icing. She was thrilled when one of our upscale grocery stores started selling tubs of their famous buttercream and chocolate buttercream icing. In fact, that's what I brought her for her birthday this year--no cake, just icing!

May 15, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterMichelle

I know exactly where those icing shots are sold... and, when you are in the mood for crazy-good buttercream, they are worth every penny. An indulgent "one for the road" when you're loading up the car with pink boxes filled with exquisite cookies or cakes for later...

May 15, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterLeslie

I love how that baby is looking around at everyone like, "WTF, dude?!?"

May 15, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterTracey

The Brains cakes are obvious-- "zombie babies eating Brains"... but I'm snickering at this look on the kids' faces when they see these pictures in 16 years and say "Mom, Really?!"

Or they'll think it's really cool. Or both, knowing teenagers. :)

May 15, 2015 | Unregistered Commenterbyrdie

Yes; I was thrown off by the dry old German (I'm surprised he had it in him)! As for the cake wanting a "big number two"? They're luckier that a lot of the cakes we've seen here recently that showed up dumping PLENTY of #2 doos! Be careful what you ass--oops--ask for.

May 15, 2015 | Unregistered Commentersendingtheclowns

I'm guessing Tattoo Baby's parents are Walking Dead fans? That's the only explanation for the baby brain cake.

May 15, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterRoxy Random

Toby has the old man ring of hair just like my sweet grandboy. The brain cake does NOT give me ideas for his 1th birthday smash cake.

@SuBee, that made me gag worse than the mac & cheese ball up there. O.O

May 15, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterJodee

I would totally do icing shots. That sounds so much more grown up than 'eating an entire carton of icing with a spoon.'

May 15, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterTitanium

I'm totally down with frosting shots! Why not cut out the middle man and just enjoy the best part of cake?

May 15, 2015 | Unregistered Commenterartgirl68

I work in a supermarket meat dept. and we always refer to the day old rotisserie chickens as the "dry olds". Because even printed on a tag by a computer, that's what it looks like. I guess our tag printer's more into honest advertising than the rest of us.

May 15, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterBanana

Lol, the icing shots! I'm pregnant, last night during dinner I told my husband that I wanted a big spoonful of icing!

May 15, 2015 | Unregistered Commenterbeppy

Oh, frosting shots are a thing now. I've seen them in more than one bakery :)

May 15, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterCarrie

brain cakes would be perfect for a zombie themed birthday for a 40 year old birthday bash.... but for babies.
Nope.

May 15, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterJdad

I love that much frosting and would probably buy two. Yes, I know how awful it is for me.

May 15, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterKathi C

At least they didn't take the euphemistic meaning of "A big number two".

May 15, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterRoy S.

I personally love the thought of brain cakes for babies and told my husband we need a friend to have a baby so we can do that.

May 15, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterAmy

That brain "cake" looks suspiciously similiar to a Halloween brain I made out of Great Stuff window sealant... Did anyone check to see if it was really frosting???

May 15, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterNaughty Nautilus

So I actually recognize the frosting shots store, and to be fair (1) it's based in Silicon Valley (SF Bay area for those unfamiliar) so everything is ridiculously overpriced here and (2) their cupcakes are btwn $3 and $4, with frosting pretty much making up half of it, so really, $2 for just the frosting, which is ridiculous delicious, is pretty good if that's all you want.

May 15, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterIvy D.

I recognize the icing shot location: it's a very high rent location in Northern California. I've spent more time there than I care to admit (why I totally recognized it), and now I'll never look at their "day old" the same way again. :)

May 15, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterHP

Actually, I think the mac-n-cheese cake is made out of that canned foam insulation my espoused loves to spray into every nook and cranny in the hopes of keeping drafts out of our 98 year old house.

May 15, 2015 | Unregistered Commenternanalettie

I'm just glad it's not "#2" in the usual wreck sense.

May 15, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterClassic Steve

In the "icing shots" picture, I'm distracted by the brown mound on the left-hand side of the picture that looks suspiciously brain-like to me. I think the idea of icing shots is brilliant.

May 15, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterChicago

Yeah, if you watch the sales carefully, you can score about 8 cans of Betty Crocker frosting for under $20. At some point, quality is no longer a concern. "My name is Velvita, I'm a frostingholic."

May 15, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterVelvita

Oh, whew! I am glad I am not the only one who thinks the baby brain cake is an awesome idea! I am a zombie fan (and also have a slightly askew sense of humor!) and would probably do something like that if I had any little ones. Minus the tattoos though--that crosses the line! :)

May 15, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterNicole

Does it actually contain a dry, old German? Maybe they found Hitler's brain!

May 15, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterChazz

We have a bakery near us that sells icing shots too! They also have little tiny plastic spoons to go with them.

May 15, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterHeather

OK, I must defend the Icing Shots. That is a photo from my very, very favorite bakery, Icing on the Cake in Los Gatos, CA. Their cakes, and everything else they make, are the best I've ever had! Their cupcakes are huge and if you love the icing as much as the cake then an Icing Shot is the best thing ever! Classic icing is $1.50 but the specialty icing is $2. Trust me, it's worth it! You will never see a wreck from this bakery!

May 15, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterRobinfromCA

Those icing shots are the best thing EVER. I can get it as extra frosting for any of their cupcakes, they have THAT MANY flavors. All of them are heaven in a cup and nothing like Betty Crocker. Plus, the day old cake is 100 times better than any grocery store cake. But don't take my word for it. Go on a field trip to Los Gatos and try it out. You will want to move next door

May 15, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterIcing Eater

Either I'm assuming that day old German chocolate cake slice is larger than it is, or those icing shots are much larger than others I've seen advertised. You could probably bake a small cake or 4-6 cupcakes and just buy one of those to ice them with. That's pretty cool if you want something quick and somewhat home made.

May 15, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterTifa

Most toddlers walk like zombies at some stage or another. This is a brilliant idea for a smash cake. I'm hoping Toby's first word was "braaaains"...! And I can't figure out why some folks are disturbed by temporary tattoos -- most kids love 'em! They just come off with baby oil....

May 15, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterEmmay

There's a thing called icing shots? Where do I sign up? :)

May 15, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterErica

the only way icing shots would make sense for me is if they were like jello shots-- a bit of vodka or tequilla in every lick :p

May 16, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterJess W.

Babies love spaghetti. Maybe the brain cake is just a bad rendition of Toby's favorite finger food, only in cake form. Kinda like the wrecky mac and cheese cake. And if you think about it, are frosting shots really any worse than gelatin shots, sugar-wise?

May 16, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterNobodee Home

Lol that kids expression is hilarious. At least his cake actually looked like a brain. It could have ended up like what that other mom got. I would love some icing shots. They sound yummy.

May 16, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterArlene Marie

Another post in support of Icing on the Cake in Los Gatos, where the icing shots are. That place is amazing, and their frosting is well worth that glorious splurge. Though, I must say that I find their cookies to be even better than their cakes, which is saying something.

But I agree with the previous commenter that a day old piece of cake from them will be still be better than a fresh cake from most other bakeries.

I've admittedly bought frosting shots myself (from a different local bakery), and have a friend that gets them for her daughter that won't eat the cake part of a cupcake. So rather than spend the money on a full cupcake, she can just get exactly the part of the treat she wants.

May 16, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterIcing Lover

Nothing wrong with Icing Shots! I sold them all the time at trade shows. People like that little cup of sweetness without the whole slice or cupcake. :) I only charged a buck for them.

May 16, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterBecky

Oh wow. Unpopular opinion maybe, but I LOVE zombie baby. He's even doing a zombie snarl in one of the cake gore photos.

May 16, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterTrisher

I love the brain cake ... the inspiration, not the day old mac'n'cheese one. And I'm surprised at the shock over the tattoos. You do know they're temporary and come off after a couple of days and a good wash, right? We have a stash of Cars and Transformers tattoos that the boys love.

May 16, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterKimberly

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